I am fifteen and am currently discerning religious life
I have not talked to the vocations director and am kind of afraid to
I know him really well and I don't know how to talk about it I have
one friend who knows but that is really it I haven’t even told my
parents and I don't usually keep stuff from them.Everybody
keeps telling me I’m going to be a nun and I still don't l
ike the idea even though I think it is true

I just can't seem to find a way to work it in to conversation when I
see our vocations director which is fairly often and I’m still scared
of what everyone else thinks even though I try not to care I also
had an awful summer (my uncle died) and it seemed to shake my
trust for everyone even God (I hate to admit it)

I just am so confused and I was doing okay with the idea
of being a nun till I when back to school I mean I go to a Catholic
high school but the kids are not particularly holy or anything

I just want advise on how I should talk to my vocations director and
how to become more comfortable with a possible vocation I also
need to find a spiritual director but am so picky that it is really hard

Please pray for me

- Chatbox

Chatbox:

My vocation search started when I was 24 (I'm 36 now). I've got a story to tell you, that may help a bit.

So here I am, in Boston; I had moved there maybe two or 3 months earlier. I went to this youth retreat, and long story short I start wondering "oh my God, is He calling me to be a nun." Can't be. No way. I don't even know what nuns do during a day. But what if? I went to 5 years of college for nothing? This is nuts. (yada, yada, yada)

So I started thinking about who I could talk about this to. No, not mom and dad. Not my friends. Hmm.

Well, there was this one priest that I met about 3 months ago. He had helped me get situated (I was moving right towards the end of my RCIA program, and I didn't want to wait another year before entering the Church).

I think I must have waited about a month before I got the nerve up to call him.

I made an appointment ... he could tell over the phone that it was important.

Well, we got together. I start trying to talk, but no words would come out.

So he started to ask "Carmen ... what is it, is it your job?"

I shook my head no ...

"Did you do something you weren't supposed to". Another head shake.

"Is it your parents?" "Your faith" ... etc. etc. etc., and I kept shaking my head no.

Finally he asked "Is it something to do with a vocation"

I adamately shook my head "yep"

His response ... "Carmen, VOCATION is not a 4 letter word . You can say it, really"

The priest I spoke with ended up becoming my spiritual director for about 8 years (not to say the same will happen).

My one suggestion is to say a prayer to the Holy Spirit, to guide you to the person He wants you to talk to, and to give you the courage to do so. I'm sure once you find the right person to discuss your feelings towards religious life, and what happened to you over the summer.

Finally -- your vocation director may already have a sense that you're called to religious life. When I told the priest from the parish that I had started RCIA at that I was considering becoming a sister, his answer was "I knew it". In fact, in hind sight I think he made hints of it when in meetings he'd call the older Carmen "Mother Carmen" and called me Sister Carmen :-).

I will pray for you this weekend for peace in heart and guidance from the Holy Spirit.


-- Carmen

I think the best thing to do is to just be honest when you talk to the vocations director about where you're at, the struggles you have, and just let him take it from there. I go back and forth all the time between marriage and priesthood, but finally decided to talk to the local vocations director just to start taking some definite steps. I also got a spiritual director. It can be tough to build any kind of certainty without those people in your life to provide solid advice and help you grow.