Sometimes when discerning a vocation, one fears not doing the will of God. But as Thomas Merton once prayed: "My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.â€
Some people state that they KNOW they are doing God's will with this or that. Others can't say for sure. But I do believe that if you pray and seek spiritual direction you will discern His will. In addition, because you are seeking His will, He will make your actions work to His will, no matter what you choose.
Flu is more sudden...it doesn't come on gradually. Achiness that takes a while to occur, especially when accompanied by a lot of coughing, can be viral, or bronchitis. Coughing is usually the last symptom to go, often taking a month or so to go away. Sneezing is often allergies or a cold, although I don't know where you live. If you have a fever that's usually a sign that it's bacterial, so if that occurs I'd seek advice from your primary provider.
Very good points by MaterMisericordiae and CherieMadame. I hadn't even thought about the visits...it depended on the sister's distance from her family in one community I entered, due to expense, but once able to visit their visits were sometimes longer. I think that practice has changed for them.
I think there are many things that should remain a little ethereal and mysterious until entrance like what one wears to bed, blessings received at various times of the day by the prioress or the various prayers a sister prays as she dons each piece of her habit. But the items mentioned, particularly the OP by EmilyAnn and the questions by NotreDame are pretty appropriate. After all, you as the aspirant are investing a lot of money and time just to potentially enter. I'm not even talking about the lifetime commitment that's made if you're meant to pursue there. Some of those things listed above, the Horarium, communal and personal prayer times and practices, apostolates, etc. are pretty basic...those things should be made known long before the first visit. Knowing if you'll be seeing family in two years or ten, for instance, is pretty significant. Knowing if you're required to pay your medical insurance the entire time you're in novitiate or just as a postulant... these things matter.
Not to be flip, but wouldn't it be great for the discerner to be able to pull up a spreadsheet that listed some of these things? It would be a great way for her to say "this community is not the one for me" or "this is something I feel called to, when I pray". When I first discerned, very few communities even had websites (that was in the early 90s). I wrote to so many. Talk about confusing!
I agree. There are many that several communities wouldn't answer to maintain the mystery of it all. I think, if some of these questions were answered prior to entrance, some wouldn't enter and/or those who did enter would be more prepared for what they were beginning and might persevere longer.
Edit to quote NotreDame: "Have they ever been investigated by a Bishop or Papal visitor? Has a founder/superior ever resigned?"
Okay, this made me laugh out loud. All I could think of was...if a community had been investigated, would they admit it? :unsure:
But all were EXCELLENT questions. :bravo: I kind of wish I'd thought of some of them and/or asked them when I was discerning. IMO, just as the community/order gives the aspirant an application, they should receive one in return...or at least have most of these covered in a brochure or website.
Right. Your scenario was presented: I am the parent of a daughter and her beloved might possibly become more than just a boyfriend, although they are not yet engaged. He has no desires for a career with much financial potential. In fact, if given proper dispensation, he could become a priest...or a teacher, if not. Your directive: AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnddddddd react.
My response isn't so much to seek more from him, but from her. Hence my post and inquiries as to her thoughts of Rite changing and potentially being involved in his ministry. If she's okay with where that might take her, I, as her parent, would rejoice with her.
I used to be in the hotel industry when I was lot younger so I've met a lot of celebs.
Bil Keane the cartoonist from The Family Circus
Tom Booth (used to go to church with him)
Several Phx Suns
Today I edit as a side job for a large publisher so I've met a lot of authors.
No one really impressed me... Except maybe John Cardinal O'Connor, May he rest in peace. Now he was pretty awesome.
Well hmmm. I've been to ordinary form Mass, low Latin, high Latin, Byzantine Rite and full Orthodox liturgy. For those I've met and/or know who have also experienced (more than once or twice) other Rites, their attitudes are NOT ambivalent. There's a reason they chose the Rite (or in the case of the Eastern Orthodox, the religion) they did. These two young people are of different Rites? Is she all right with changing Rites? I don't know if this was mentioned before but I'm pretty sure, because she'd be his wife, she would be required to officially change Rites. I was never asked to when I made a Byzantine parish my home 5 yrs ago. I was told could be known as Roman Rite while attending, but could if I felt called to do so. (I'm no longer there as I moved out of the area, so that issue became moot for me.) I know for Orthodox men who aspire to the priesthood, their wives are required to also be fully Orthodox. I have good friends who were raised Eastern Catholic, but now he (the husband) is Orthodox. He's a deacon...and cannot be ordained a priest unless his wife converts. She's still E. Catholic.
One other thing you should ask of your daughter is if she's aware of her own potential time commitment to her parish. I do know not know well the priest's wife's role in Eastern Rite churches. But I do know four matushkas/presvyteras... Eastern O. wives. All but one are intimately involved in the parish, ie: choir director, Sunday school director, etc. a priest's vocation is a family affair, at times. Is she all right with that, should she be asked to assume an active role where he serves?
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My brother just went through a similar experience and their little family stills grieves, including their other dog. It will take time. And the time you take, however short or long, is what's needed for you.
My puppy has been with me through thick and thin... She has often been there when my family wasn't. She's well now, thanks be to God, but considering her death brings forth more grief than would most people's. I feel your loss and will keep you and your family in my prayers.