Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Crusader_4

Discerning And Family

Recommended Posts

Crusader_4    0
Crusader_4
One pat of me seems to be calling me to the priesthood while another is calling towards a married life and perhaps a deaconate I was wondering how is a good way to discern this one, esepcially as an adolecesnt. Also i have a difficult family situation where i am the only Catholic in an all protestant family (some members are ex-Catholic) and they have quite often told me bluntly to never become a priest. Does anyone from any similar backgrounds have any good advice?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Theoketos    209
Theoketos
To give one's self to another is more then merely desiring what is good for another is something more then attraction desire or goodwill.

When betrothed love enters into this interpersonal relationship or union something more then friendship results: two give themselves to each other.

Whether to a human person or God such a gift creates a special form of love which we define as betrothed Love.

In Giving ourselves we find clear proof that we posses ourselves

In order for instance to 'give oneself entirely' to the vocation of the doctor, teacher, or pastor, it suffices simply to desire the good of those for whom these duties are preformed. And even in if this form of behavior comes to resemble a complete surrender of the self and so establishes its claim to be love it would still be difficult to apply the name 'betrothed love' to it.

All of these are from [i]Love and Responsibility[/i] Edited by Theoketos

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
DojoGrant    0
DojoGrant
This is just my feeling on the matter, so don't take it for the Gospel. ;)

I believe that celibacy is a calling (the single life), as I'm sure you do. What I had to come to realize in my own calling is that, in the immediacy of discernment, its more of single life vs. married life than priesthood vs. married life. The priesthood is indeed a calling and a vocation, but if you cannot accept celibacy, and you're Roman rite, I don't believe that would be calling you to serve in this way since he would not put you in a position that does not fit your particular calling.

By the way, the "you"s above are general; I wasn't implying anything about you personally! Rereading it I thought it might come across that way.

I too am the only Catholic in an all Protestant family, but I didn't really share my discernment process with them (knowing they would be displeased) until I discerned that I was indeed being called to that and made peace with being called to celibacy. Finding that peace in my life opened my heart in all sorts of different ways and helped me find the grace of courage to share that with family that would not and still to a great degree does not understand this calling and prays that this is really not God's will for me.

When I first started being moved by the priesthood by the Spirit, I was still dating a girl of two and a half years, with future plans to marry (although nothing concrete at that point; no proposal or anything as drastic as that). So, I was literally scared to death, because I felt that God was calling me to something I just couldn't do. The deaconate started looking mighty good to me because, hey, "THAT" was doable. But at least for me, that was a copout. I wasn't being called to the deaconate; I was just trying to bargain my life with God. Needless to say, I finally surrendered to Him and it was then that I found peace.

Oh, also, my girlfriend and I broke up just a matter of months after I started hearing the call, and as much as I dreaded a possible break up and how I would be devastated by it, it was the most peaceful thing in the world. We've been broken up two years as of yesterday, and we still very much love each other and are there for one another, but in the capacity that God had planned for us. His will be done, not my own.

You're in my prayers!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friarMatt    0
friarMatt
My parents are both Catholic, mom devout daily communicant, dad cultural Boston Irish who would NEVER be anything else....they where both apprehensive about me entering the friars, but the more they have seen from me this last few years, how happy I am, how life giving it is, etc th more they will support u...they started out very proud of me, but not to happy, now they are very proud and happy and the irnoy/paradox, ii feel like i have grown closer to my family since being further away!

in Christ and Mary,
fr. Matt, ofm conv

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
sista2b    2
sista2b
ya wanna know how i talk my parents i wanted to look into religious life?
i went up to a retreat, only thinking about it for a month before hand, they didn't have a clue. so i come back at 10 or 11 Sunday evening just beeming from ear to ear. i tried to hide it but just couldn't. my dad knew something was up. i think just seeing me that night was enough to tell him, and he's ok w/ it. even supports it.
my mom well i'll use smileys to illistrate :blink: :huh: :o :mellow: :blink: :wacko: :( :unsure: :freak: :weep: :scratch:
and eventually :surrender: though shes still not exactly thrilled w/ the idea

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friarMatt    0
friarMatt
Lifeteener.....

either tell them honestly and forthrightly or do what I did...i started leaving vocation material around my room....when my mom went in their she found it, she took me aside and aske me, this was at the early stages...she approached me as if she found drugs or a dirty magazine, kinda funny but also kinda sad... pray about it, and don;t rush into it when you are going to school, but sit down maybe with a coffee and have a good heartfelt talk...also make sure they are a part of the process

in Christ and Mary,
fr. Matt

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
FaustinaVianney    0
FaustinaVianney
Crusader--that's a touhg situation..I, too, am the only Catholic in an all-Protestant family. Well, 'cept for one aunt, but that is it. My entire family grew up hating Catholics and tried to teach me the same thing, (obviously it didn't work). I would encourage you to tell your parents along as it won't make things 'worse' for you. Right you are just thinking about it right? So, inquire, talk to priest, deacons, and others and if you think your fam can handle it then tell them what you are thinking about doing. Adolescent years are hard enough without parents telling you not to consecrate yourself to the Lord!! If your fam finds out before you tell them--don't lie, but let them know what you are thinking about. I think it is important to let your fam in on what you are thinking about, but maybe after you have found out a little about that vocation. Just my thoughts...

*HUGs-n-PEACE*
:) :) :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
cathgirl    0
cathgirl
[quote name='lifeteener' date='Apr 24 2004, 01:01 AM'] hmm ya i dont know how 2 tell my parents that i wanna learn more about priesthood :\ [/quote]
That's how i feel sometims...except, not w/ the priesthood ^_^

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
zwergel88    0
zwergel88
[quote]when my mom went in their she found it, she took me aside and aske me, this was at the early stages...she approached me as if she found drugs or a dirty magazine, kinda funny but also kinda sad... [/quote]

yeah, that is kinda like what my mom did. I sort of told her just yesterday that after I graduate, I think that I might like to be a sister. She looked totally dissapointed and sort of looked at me like I was crazy. She also told me that I wasn't doing anything like that untill after I finish college. Oh well, I think that she will probably warm up to the idea slowly. I wish all the rest of you guys good luck dealing with your parents, I think this is one of the most difficult stages of the discernment process.

Anna.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

Sign in to follow this  

×