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Ten Things For An Aspirant Not To Say


IgnatiusofLoyola

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PhuturePriest

I know you guys shave off your hair as a penance, but can I keep mine? I don't see the need in throwing away such a ridiculously amazing gift from God.

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"I 'want' to be a nun so I don't have to work."
I really heard that from someone when I was starting to discern, they were like I don't like to have to pay the electric bill.

I hate driving as well and solely for that reason, I'm entering a Monastery.

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Ancilla Domini

I have a list of 1001 movies I want to watch before I die, but I'm only at 534. Could I continue to check off my list while I'm at the convent?

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:unsure:

 

Your vows are so....archaic. Can't I just invent my own and take those?

I love your order, but I really hate your apostolate. You guys need a serious revamp.

Why is formation so long? I'm already sure I want to be a nun. Can't I just make my perpetual profession now??!?!?

I actually know someone who said that to her vocation directress and the VD looked at her funny.  

 

She didn't enter into that community.

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Actually, this doesn't seem like an unreasonable request if done for the right reasons and in the right setting (privately with VD or Superior).  If you get a letter from your doctor, they might allow you to bring it.
 

My favorite pillow that I love to hug says sexy female dog on it, so probably not.

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I use this special serum for my face, will you be able to make it available to me? I would hate to end up a wrinkly nun.

 

 

Your cook isn't very imaginative is she? We've had the same veggies three days in a row. Maybe you should send her on a refresher course.

 

 

You want me to dig - with an actual spade? Where's the rotovator?

 

 

Have you people never heard of a vacuum cleaner? What's with all this beating the rugs by hand?

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I don't really believe all the tenets of the Catholic faith and lean more towards Eastern religions, so can I just sit in the back of the chapel and watch everyone else participate in the Mass? I promise to be quiet.

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I'm giving up all my earthly possessions, but I insist that you take them.  They include 12 bottles of vintage wine, 4 bottles of rum, 3 bottles of bourbon, 5 bottles of gin, 2 bottles of vodka, an 18-pack set of Hofbräuhaus beer, a cocktail shaker set, 6 Pope Benedict shot glasses, and two beer steins I hand-painted myself.

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I'm giving up all my earthly possessions, but I insist that you take them.  They include 12 bottles of vintage wine, 4 bottles of rum, 3 bottles of bourbon, 5 bottles of gin, 2 bottles of vodka, an 18-pack set of Hofbräuhaus beer, a cocktail shaker set, 6 Pope Benedict shot glasses, and two beer steins I hand-painted myself.

 

 

 

I sure hope you have good communion wine. Who's your buyer?

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