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Catholic Church Denies Funeral For Local Gay Man...maybe


katholikkid

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katholikkid

SAN DIEGO -- A funeral service for a gay parishioner that was canceled by a Catholic church will be allowed to take place, according to the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Diego. The church, however, has not communicated the decision change to either the family of the deceased man or the media.

Local businessman and devout Catholic John Sanfilippo died last week after struggling with emphysema. Friends said Sanfilippo planned for the funeral mass to be held at Our Lady of the Rosary Catholic Church in Little Italy, where Sanfilippo had attended for decades. Friends said he even left the church a large sum of money in his will.

This past weekend, Sanfilippo's partner of 28 years and Sanfilippo's family were notified that the church canceled the funeral because Sanfilippo was gay.


Friend Patrick Cannon told 10News, "The fact that they're now turning their backs on him is a… sad thing."

"It's like 2005 all over again for us Catholics… especially us gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Catholics," said Nicole Murray-Ramirez, Sanfilippo's friend.

Ramirez told 10News the same thing happened in 2005 when Bishop Robert Brom said John McCusker, a gay businessman, could not have his funeral at any of the diocese's churches. McCusker's funeral was eventually held at an Episcopal church.

Friends said some of McCusker's family converted to the Episcopalian church because of the way they were treated by the Catholic Church. Bishop Brom apologized to the family after the fact.

"This is the only diocese [where] this has come up," said Ramirez, who is also Catholic. "This is the second time in the entire nation."

He led a small group in prayer outside the Our Lady of the Rosary on Monday and taped a letter addressed to Brom to the front door of the church. Ramirez said the letter asks the bishop to clarify the church's position on funerals for gay parishioners.

"Are there going to be others that are going to be denied in the future? Will we have to go through this again?" asked Ramirez.

Sanfilippo's partner and his family were not available for comment on Monday.

In an email, Rodrigo Valdivia, the chancellor of the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Diego, told 10News, "The Diocesan office was notified about this situation earlier today... Diocesan Authorities have concluded that the funeral as scheduled at Our Lady of the Rosary Parish may take place. Plans for the ritual are yet to be made."

At the cocktail lounge that Sanfilippo owned for 28 years came outrage from friends over what some called a confusing statement from the San Diego diocese.

"All of a sudden, they change their mind and say, 'Well, you know, we may still allow the funeral to be here.' Why? Because they got caught in the process of denying equal rights to people?" asked Neil Thomas, a friend and customer of Sanfilippo's.

Cannon also believes the statement is unclear.

"I think it's confusing… They did their best to put the verbiage in there that they needed because they still have their… out," he said.

Ramirez said the statement was proof the parish was acting alone and the diocese needs a diocese-wide policy so a similar situation does not happen again.

But after a hurtful rejection, it appears Sanfilippo's family has moved on.

"From what I'm told, they don't want it there now," said Thomas.

Ramirez said Sanfilippo's family had already found another Catholic church for the funeral. Ramirez said the family would not feel comfortable going back to Our Lady of the Rosary after what happened.

No one from Our Lady of the Rosary was available for comment.

--San Diego 10 News.


First of all I am a new-ish member of phatmass and love it! Since this is such a hot topic lately I would like your guy's thoughts on it. Pax Christi :-)

Edited by katholikkid
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katholikkid

As a disclaimer that was the title of the news story. I added the "...maybe" because the title was made to sound more sensationalist by the news.

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Nihil Obstat

He died having lived in a state, quite publicly, which was contrary to moral law. If I'm not mistaken, a publicly celebrated requiem Mass would be inappropriate in his circumstances.

Edited by Nihil Obstat
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This makes sense to me ... since the guy had a "partner" .... if he was living a celibate life then I don't think this would be right... of course the reporter does not distinguish between the two... which DOES make that parish sound like bad guys...

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katholikkid

[quote name='sixpence' timestamp='1309287622' post='2259800']
This makes sense to me ... since the guy had a "partner" .... if he was living a celibate life then I don't think this would be right... of course the reporter does not distinguish between the two... which DOES make that parish sound like bad guys...
[/quote]

Yeah I agree it is a bit sensationalist and lazy. But I guess the fact he was a parishioner is where it gets gray for me even supposing he was aware of the contradiction of his lifestyle and church teaching and thus never received but still attended for the 30 years. Maybe a memorial service or something could have been done if it was not offered in the first place. Again the story is under-reported. Just some thoughts.

Edited by katholikkid
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[quote name='sixpence' timestamp='1309287622' post='2259800']
This makes sense to me ... since the guy had a "partner" .... if he was living a celibate life then I don't think this would be right... of course the reporter does not distinguish between the two... which DOES make that parish sound like bad guys...
[/quote]

How many homosexuals do you know who are linked to a "partner" live a celibate lifestyle?

I know hundreds (yes, literally) who do not. The connotation assumes a sexual relationship. That is one of the definers of an active gay lifestyle....

We can argue all we want about the semantics of this....the reality is that he and his "partner" lived together and the GLBT community is bemoaning and supporting him...I don't know of any GLBT group anywhere which advocates celibacy for "partnerships."

So, it is safe to assume that he was not celibate.

On another note, it is absolutely irrelevant that he left money to this parish. I am grateful that he did, but that has no bearing on the state of his soul at the time of death. It would also make sense that if he had repented and made proper amends before his death, then he would have been afforded a Catholic funeral.

So, I think that this is yet another example of the MSM misinterpreting the truth of the Church.

I will pray for his living family members who apostatized and fled to the Anglican Church. They need our prayers too.

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Nihil Obstat

Cam, would I also be right in saying that he cannot be buried in a consecrated cemetery, or is that no longer 'on the books'?

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[quote name='Nihil Obstat' timestamp='1309288945' post='2259817']
Cam, would I also be right in saying that he cannot be buried in a consecrated cemetery, or is that no longer 'on the books'?
[/quote]

That would be correct.

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Nihil Obstat

[quote name='Cam42' timestamp='1309289029' post='2259820']
That would be correct.
[/quote]
Kewl. I thought so. Thank you.

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[quote name='Nihil Obstat' timestamp='1309289135' post='2259822']
Kewl. I thought so. Thank you.
[/quote]

Yeace...no problems... you haz teh pwnership on that one!

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What's the problem? He was a devout Catholic... according to the article. <----sarcasm

[size=1]edited to avoid phishy tag[/size]

Edited by Papist
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[quote name='Cam42' timestamp='1309288213' post='2259809']
How many homosexuals do you know who are linked to a "partner" live a celibate lifestyle?

I know hundreds (yes, literally) who do not. The connotation assumes a sexual relationship. That is one of the definers of an active gay lifestyle....

We can argue all we want about the semantics of this....the reality is that he and his "partner" lived together and the GLBT community is bemoaning and supporting him...I don't know of any GLBT group anywhere which advocates celibacy for "partnerships."

So, it is safe to assume that he was not celibate.

[/quote]

oh my goodness!.... please be consoled.... (:console:) I was not trying to claim that this guy was leading a celibate lifestlye at all; I'm sure he wasn't... I simply meant that the reporter should have clarified that this was the reasoning and not just because the guy was gay...

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Nihil Obstat

[quote name='Papist' timestamp='1309290189' post='2259833']
What's the problem? He was a devout Catholic... according to the article.
[/quote]
A 'devout' Catholic who lived in a state publicly contrary to morality.

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[quote name='Nihil Obstat' timestamp='1309290311' post='2259836']
A 'devout' Catholic who lived in a state publicly contrary to morality.
[/quote]
Exactly my point. The media loves to always put devout in there regardless. The author was trying to sway the reader. A 2nd grader can see the contradiction in someone being a devout Catholic while having sex with other men.

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