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The St. Monica Club


MissyP89

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[quote name='MargaretTeresa' timestamp='1312691319' post='2282817']
Yeah... I don't know if that would have flown with their craziness.

Mom: "Why were looking it up online?"
Me: "I stumbled on it reading a blog."
Mom: "Why are you reading Catholic blogs?"
Me: "Because I want to."
Mom: "Are you Catholic."
Me: "....."

Since she doesn't approve my of le "Catholic-ness" :doh:
[/quote]

Ah, I get the picture. For me, I was raised in the Church -- well, dragged to CCD (catechism classes) every week because "if I had to do it, then so do you." We never went to Mass, only when I was required to in preparation for a Sacrament. Basically, for my first 13 years it was all empty and forced. Mom went to Catholic school and had a similar experience to Julian -- they would be hit behind the knees with rulers as a form of discipline, Mass was in Latin and no one understood it. Everything was rules, rules, rules.

So basically, I was sent to classes and got my Sacraments to have a good moral foundation. I wasn't supposed to do or believe anything the Church said. People that did were brainwashed and crazy.

The hard part, I think, is being dropped off at Mass. People watch us walk in together, her kiss me and walk back out. I know people wonder why I'm always there alone. Being the only one under 35 doesn't help, either. :lol: I sit in the back for a reason.

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tinytherese

My dad was raised in a Christmas and Easter church going Methodist home. He converted to Catholicism for his first wife so that there would be unity in the family. They were having marital problems, so they went to see a therapist. On the second session, dad found out that she had no intention of trying to stay together with him, that she had already met someone else. Dad of course asked, why the heck they were even there, and she responded that it was to ease the transition. My brother was two years old at the time of the divorce. My mom had come to the conclusion that she would only marry a Catholic and dad counted, even though he only went to Mass at Christmas and Easter. He got an annulment from the Church and married her.

It wasn't until I was a freshman in college that he went to Mass more frequently, almost every week. Eventually, he came to going every week, but it is clear that he still has serious issues with Catholicism and he doesn't believe in the true presence. He has been known to corner me with questions on why the Church does what it does, but he doesn't let me give a very long answer and then he would pretend to be playing devil's advocate with more questions, when in reality he gave off the impression that he was attacking and not truly trying to learn. It was basically done in an, "Answer Me This You Devout naiive Catholic girl!" and wouldn't allow me to answer his questions fully. He's abusive on multiple levels to mom, my brother, and I. I've been staying with my grandparents five minutes away when I'm home from school since I refuse to live in that environment with him. Mom wants to leave him, but she hasn't been able to find an impartial lawyer since she herself is a lawyer and knows so many that would favor her and she knows that that wouldn't be fair to dad.

Mom sometimes leans on the liberal Catholic side. For example she votes for pro-choice candidates. She also still doesn't understand why getting drunk is a grave sin. She works 60+ hours a week because of the change in direction in her law firm because of the economy and the flood that happened in my home town years ago which we're still recovering from. I'd like to catechize her (along with other members of my family,) but she doesn't seem to have the time.

I'm concerned about my 9 year old brother who is rude and has an unhealthy obsession with violence. He says that he wants to join the military when he grows up to torture and kill terrorists. The other night he made a paper dolls that was supposed to be Osama Bin Ladden and he stabbed it with a swiss army knife. Mom usually doesn't discipline him, but threatens to. Just turning him and saying, "Ben, that was naughty," isn't going to do much for the little hand-ful. He also isn't being well catechized. My parents let him watch movies that I would definitely not want a 9 year old, let alone one that is not properly catechized in todays world to watch. If he were a high school or college kid who was properly catechized, he might realize how stupid and inappropriate those Austin Powers films and the like are and know that they are unhealthy.

My godparents (who are my mom's brother and sister) need prayers as well. My godfather/uncle doesn't go to Mass. If my godmother/aunt goes to Mass it is not consistent. My cousin usually doesn't even want to go to Mass. My uncle either used to be Catholic or never was. (His parents are Catholic though.) Dad's side is almost completely Protestant. My brother from dad's first marriage was baptized Catholic but confirmed Lutheran. I'm not sure what he believes now.

That was a long rant. :covereyes:

Edited by tinytherese
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"...My conscience joins with the Holy Spirit in bearing me witness
that I have great sorrow and constant anguish in my heart.
[b]For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ
for the sake of my own people,[/b]
my kindred according to the flesh."
--Romans 9:1-2


The hardest thing for me is to know I am willingly separating myself from the people I love. Sometimes, it feels easier to just forget about God, or bargain with Him. Looks like St. Paul felt this way, too.

That passage has always brought me comfort. It's OK to feel torn.

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TheresaThoma

On the topic of good Scripture passages here is another one I like Matthew 10:34-36. It is not an encouraging passage but it keeps me grounded. It reminds me that even though I face strong opposition in my family that doesn't mean I'm going against God's will or doing something bad.

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I half belong I suppose. My dad is "catholic", although even that is a stretch. He converted to marry my mom, and he only goes to Church when we are with him (note: my parents are divorced). I would consider him to be more atheist than "catholic", very secular, and very liberal. He could definitely use some serious prayers.

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MargaretTeresa

[quote name='TheresaThoma' timestamp='1313043020' post='2285822']
On the topic of good Scripture passages here is another one I like Matthew 10:34-36. It is not an encouraging passage but it keeps me grounded. It reminds me that even though I face strong opposition in my family that doesn't mean I'm going against God's will or doing something bad.
[/quote]

This is one passage I have kept in mind all too much. :(

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Deus te Amat

Psalm 27 :|

The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom do I fear? The LORD is my life's refuge; of whom am I afraid?
When evildoers come at me to devour my flesh, These my enemies and foes themselves stumble and fall.
Though an army encamp against me, my heart does not fear; Though war be waged against me, even then do I trust.
One thing I ask of the LORD; this I seek: To dwell in the LORD'S house all the days of my life, To gaze on the LORD'S beauty, to visit his temple.
For God will hide me in his shelter in time of trouble, Will conceal me in the cover of his tent; and set me high upon a rock.
Even now my head is held high above my enemies on every side!
I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing and chant praise to the LORD.
Hear my voice, LORD, when I call; have mercy on me and answer me.
"Come," says my heart, "seek God's face"; your face, LORD, do I seek.
Do not hide your face from me; do not repel your servant in anger.
You are my help; do not cast me off; do not forsake me, God my savior!
[b]Even if my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will take me in.[/b]
LORD, show me your way; lead me on a level path because of my enemies.
Do not abandon me to the will of my foes; malicious and lying witnesses have risen against me.
But I believe I shall enjoy the LORD'S goodness in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD, take courage; be stouthearted, wait for the LORD!

Edited by Deus_te_Amat
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Clare~Therese

[quote name='mcts' timestamp='1312428648' post='2281278']
I'm not QUITE in this club, seeing as my mom and brothers are definitely practicing, but my dad isn't Catholic. You guys have my prayers, though!
[/quote]


This is my situation also. My mother and my brother are Catholic but my father isn't.
My brother doesn't really seem to care about religious things though. If my mom didn't make him go to Mass I'm pretty sure he wouldn't go. My brother is indifferent; part of me wonders if I should tell him to go to Confession before he goes to Mass again with my mom and me.
None of the three of us who are Catholic were Catechized very well (at least not that I can remember) too, so I try to explain some things I know that they don't seem to, but when they don't get it I get really frustrated. I wish I was more patient with them.
Also, my brother doesn't understand the Real Presence. And if he did he probably wouldn't care.

I've asked my mom if we could read the Catechism together or something so we could know more, but she basically said that I have to do it on my own because my mom is busy and my brother is indifferent, as I said. That makes it really hard for me sometimes because as my priest said, "There [can] be no such thing as a solitary Catholic." In other words, we need some kind of support from our fellow Catholics; we can't do this alone. Which is a big part of why I love being part of the Phatmass phamily.

Edited to add:
I'm very concerned for the soul of my brother and my father's soul too.
My father, I think, tries to be a good person, but he's pretty much rejected organized religion because of some experiences when he was younger. Basically the gist of it was, the Protestant church he went to wanted a certain amount of money from him once he was 18, otherwise they would no longer consider him part of their church. That didn't bother my father too much. What did bother him, though, was when someone went to his mother's house from that church and basically badgered my grandma into giving the guy the money, even though my father didn't want to give them any money. So I'm pretty sure my father's reasoning is that organized religion just wants his money. He used to go to Christmas and Easter Mass with us (didn't receive the Eucharist) but now he doesn't even do that.

Edited [b]AGAIN[/b] to add:
But I've read what others have posted here and I'm not sure if I have much to rant about really.

Edited by Clare~Therese
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[quote name='Clare~Therese' timestamp='1313107738' post='2286223']


This is my situation also. My mother and my brother are Catholic but my father isn't.
My brother doesn't really seem to care about religious things though. If my mom didn't make him go to Mass I'm pretty sure he wouldn't go. My brother is indifferent; part of me wonders if I should tell him to go to Confession before he goes to Mass again with my mom and me.
None of the three of us who are Catholic were Catechized very well (at least not that I can remember) too, so I try to explain some things I know that they don't seem to, but when they don't get it I get really frustrated. I wish I was more patient with them.
Also, my brother doesn't understand the Real Presence. And if he did he probably wouldn't care.

I've asked my mom if we could read the Catechism together or something so we could know more, but she basically said that I have to do it on my own because my mom is busy and my brother is indifferent, as I said. That makes it really hard for me sometimes because as my priest said, "There [can] be no such thing as a solitary Catholic." In other words, we need some kind of support from our fellow Catholics; we can't do this alone. Which is a big part of why I love being part of the Phatmass phamily.

Edited to add:
I'm very concerned for the soul of my brother and my father's soul too.
My father, I think, tries to be a good person, but he's pretty much rejected organized religion because of some experiences when he was younger. Basically the gist of it was, the Protestant church he went to wanted a certain amount of money from him once he was 18, otherwise they would no longer consider him part of their church. That didn't bother my father too much. What did bother him, though, was when someone went to his mother's house from that church and basically badgered my grandma into giving the guy the money, even though my father didn't want to give them any money. So I'm pretty sure my father's reasoning is that organized religion just wants his money. He used to go to Christmas and Easter Mass with us (didn't receive the Eucharist) but now he doesn't even do that.

Edited [b]AGAIN[/b] to add:
But I've read what others have posted here and I'm not sure if I have much to rant about really.
[/quote]

What you have is worth ranting about regardless of the size of the issues.

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MargaretTeresa

Rant all you wish. It's tough going through this. I'm firming up nun run plans and telling my mom that I'm going to visit a friend. But whatever makes it happen...

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[quote name='IrishSalesian' timestamp='1313283050' post='2287287']
Hi Im back...maybe...
[/quote]

There are safe havens, if you know where to look. ;) *hugs*

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[quote name='MargaretTeresa' timestamp='1313281073' post='2287281']
Rant all you wish. It's tough going through this. I'm firming up nun run plans and telling my mom that I'm going to visit a friend. But whatever makes it happen...
[/quote]

I never did that for a "nun run". But until I broke the news of my conversion to them, my parents thought I went to the Perpetual Adoration Chapel just for the silence.

[quote name='IrishSalesian' timestamp='1313283050' post='2287287']
Hi Im back...maybe...
[/quote]

WOOT!

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