50 replies to this topic

[CatherineM]

Outside the bars, but still, it's a day I'll never get back. A kid from church, we've been helping out for a couple of years ended up in jail last night. He's the youngest of 10 kids. His dad is a drug addict that lives at the homeless shelter. About half of his older siblings are addicts. His mom is raising 3 of her grandkids. We've been trying to be a stable, positive influence for him, and until a couple of months ago, he has been just a great kid. He started hanging out with older kids, started doing pot, and last night they robbed and beat up a pizza delivery guy. He used a baseball bat. If he wasn't 16 years old, he'd be facing some serious time. We are committed to being in his face daily if necessary. We got him bailed out, but I don't know if he is facing prison time for this since it is a first offense and the pizza guy is going to be okay. I could have rung his neck. It definitely takes a village to raise kids today.

[missionseeker]

Many prayers for this kid.

And for you.


And don't start topics with those kinds of titles!

[brandelynmarie]

What she said. Wow!

[Selah]

[LaPetiteSoeur]

Prayers for him.

[BG45]

Prayers for him and for you all to be so committed to helping him!

[MaterMisericordiae]

Oh my! CatherineM, you had me worried! I thought YOU were arrested or something. I'm not happy to hear about your "foster" kid hanging with the wrong crowd. Praying that your influence rubs off on him and he grows up to be a Christian man.

[Seven77]

prayers for this poor kid and his family.

[incarnatewordsister]

Prayers for him and for you. God bless your commitment to him.

[CatherineM]

Just got home from enrolling him in the Cadets. It's kind of a combination of Explorer Scouts and JROTC. We have committed to taking him every Monday night, and for a weekend a month. It means I have to drop one of my classes next semester that meets on Monday night, and will delay my graduation, but people before schedules. Monday and Thursday mornings he will go to the rec center with us. While we are in water aerobics, he will work out in the gym or play basketball or something. I don't think he's going to do water aerobics with the rest of the old fogies, but he could swim laps. Once a week he will also be volunteering at the Marian Centre. They feed the homeless. He gets to work in the back. We don't want him to work with the clients. He already knows how to make friends with drug addicts. We want him to learn how to make relationships with healthy people, and the Madonna House people are as healthy and holy a group of people as we could hope for. We were afraid his mom would feel like we were usurping her authority, but she is so overwhelmed with life that she is taking all the help she can get.

We also got him a cell phone today, not as a reward obviously. He has to work it off shoveling snow. We wanted to be able to keep better track of him, and his mom did too. Plus, we have told him that any time he needs us, we will come get him, no questions asked. Next time he is with people who are getting out of hand, he knows he can call us to come get him. I had that rule with my boys that if they found themselves some place where it meant having to ride with a drunk driver for example, they could call, and I'd come get them, and there would be no punishment for anything that might have gone on. We've also been feeding him at least once a day. His mom depends on the food bank, and sometimes that doesn't make for the best nutrition.

He asked me if I thought he'd have to go to jail. I don't know here, back home probably. I did tell him that if he does, then he needs to take his consequences like a man, but we would visit every visiting day, and make sure his mom has a ride to come too. We take them to his meeting with a parole officer tomorrow in preparation for a court hearing on Friday. I just don't know how juvenile justice works here, but after this, I guess I will.

[Luigi]

He's in good hands - laws vary by jurisdiction, but you have a legal mind and you'll be able to figure it out. If the kid goes from bad to worse, it won't be for lack of support & role models.

You're doing yeoman's work, and I've got him on the refrigerator prayer list.

[CatherineM]

Well, he can use all the prayers he can get. His name is Zack.

[TheresaThoma]

I will add him into my prayers. Hopefully this will be a wakeup call for him to get his life back on track. JROTC should be good for him. I know a kid who was really messed up but ended up straightening his life out and ROTC was a big part of that.

[i<3franciscans]

Prayers for him! JROTC is a great program, it will do a lot of good for him.

[CatherineM]

Just got back from a meeting with his parole officer. There is a chance that the charges might eventually get dropped. Since the two people he was with are in their middle 20's, and are known drug dealers with prior arrests, and Zack is 16 without a record, they may decide to consider him a Fagin/Oliver Twist kind of thing. In other words, a younger kid influenced or coerced by older individuals. That wouldn't be until next spring at the earliest. In the meantime, he has to go through every hoop and stay out of trouble. Since the other two weren't even granted bail, at least I don't have to worry about him hanging out with them.

[MissScripture]

He's pretty blessed to have you in his life! Prayers that you can help him get things back on the right track.

[Norseman82]

Catherine,

You are truly doing God's work.

We also got him a cell phone today, not as a reward obviously. He has to work it off shoveling snow. We wanted to be able to keep better track of him, and his mom did too. Plus, we have told him that any time he needs us, we will come get him, no questions asked. Next time he is with people who are getting out of hand, he knows he can call us to come get him. I had that rule with my boys that if they found themselves some place where it meant having to ride with a drunk driver for example, they could call, and I'd come get them, and there would be no punishment for anything that might have gone on.

May I offer a bit of unsolicited advice? It would be a good idea for him to learn that hanging around with the wrong crowd will lead to trouble, and if he weren't hanging around with the wrong crowd maybe he would not need to have that cell phone in the first place (at least that's how we survived in the pre-cell phone days).

[CatherineM]

The cell phone is more for my husband so that he can call him when the walk needs shoveling. He's an indentured servant until it's paid for anyway. We did that with him a year ago when one of his low life relatives stole his tools for drug money. We got him a new set, and promptly put him to work with them. One of the problems with him is that he has never attended school. His mom is supposed to be homeschooling him, but he's never socialized with other kids besides his brothers and sisters. When I homeschooled, my foster sons did little league and boy scouts and CCD stuff, so they were always around other kids. He literally never learned how to make friends, so the first losers who showed up and were nice to him he thought were the greatest. His mom is pretty weird too. She reminds me of the mom in the movie, Carrie.

Something else we found out today is that when he was arrested, they did a drug test, and he had more in his system than just pot. It looks like they soaked his joints in something. I don't think he knew about it because he seemed quite confused as to how one could soak a joint in something. He's been so sheltered, that I know more street slang than he does. He's the youngest, and I will say his mom did a good job of keeping him away from his brothers and sisters who were using drugs because he would know more about this stuff than he does.

[Lil Red]

Catherine,
I just wanted to say that you are one of the awesomest people i know. you have much love & prayers from me.

[Lisa]

You are all in my prayers.