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Encourage Vocations!


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#1 FuturePriest387

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Posted 03 March 2012 - 09:47 PM

It is quite common for me to hear about suppressed vocations. For parents to tell their children they cannot be a Priest or join the Religious life. I recall a while ago a woman saying that her local Priest spent a while teaching young boys how to be altar servers. They spent a good while doing this, and by the time the parents came to pick them up, one of the younger boys ran up to his parents excitedly and told them about how much he enjoyed it, and said that he wanted to be a Priest. The father replied quite simply "No." The boy looked quite disappointed, and said "Well, I do like to do a lot of things anyway..." That was it. He walked with his parents back to their car, and that was the end of it. How truly sad that this happens, and how truly sad it is that this is so common. Parents fall into the problem of imagining what their children will do. The career they envision for them varies, but ultimately, they always envision the child to get married and have children. Once they have this vision for their children, they refuse to have it taken away, and when the child suddenly takes an interest in the Priesthood or Religious life, they become angry, and tell their child that they can't. The same people that go to Mass every week and say "Thy will be done" thousands of times don't actually mean it. In reality, they're saying "Thy will be done... *Whispers* As long as your will is my will..." You cannot truly say you want the best for your child if you don't want what God wants for him/her.

I have been blessed with a family that is accepting and in fact encourages my vocation (Except for my brother, but that's a different story). I have some family that if I told would think it was completely stupid and I can imagine that they will talk about how my parents didn't raise me right, but I have mostly been in a very good environment. Because of this ability to freely discern it has been easier for me to realize my deep inclinations towards the life, and when I am of age I plan to visit many communities, and I can rest easy that I won't have to tell my parents that I am "doing errands". I would encourage everyone here (Especially parents) to encourage people that are discerning, and to in fact encourage them to start discerning in the first place. Father David Mary of the Franciscan Brothers Minor says that you should in fact discern the Religious life or Priesthood first, not marriage. Encourage people to visit the Community they like, to go on the Diocese's annual visit to the Seminary, and to truly look deeper into it. Instead of saying "No." encourage them, help them to discern, show them where to go, and let God's will be done.

Edited by FuturePriest387, 03 March 2012 - 09:49 PM.


#2 mysisterisalittlesister

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Posted 03 March 2012 - 09:58 PM

Yes, I agree! Nurturing vocations is very important!

But if someone was really truly called to a religious vocation, I don't really think it would matter If someone discouraged them. If it was really God's will, then it would, somehow, someday, happen. Just my little opinion.

#3 FutureCarmeliteClaire

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Posted 03 March 2012 - 09:59 PM

That first story about the young boy was so sad... :(

Yes, I agree! Nurturing vocations is very important!

But if someone was really truly called to a religious vocation, I don't really think it would matter If someone discouraged them. If it was really God's will, then it would, somehow, someday, happen. Just my little opinion.

You are right, but it is still really sad and I know that it really can hurt you for a long time...

#4 Nola Seminarian

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Posted 03 March 2012 - 10:25 PM

My parents are not supportive of my [possible] vocation, yet, here i am at seminary! If someone truly has a vocation, God WILL find a way to put you where he wants you to be.

#5 FuturePriest387

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Posted 03 March 2012 - 10:31 PM

My parents are not supportive of my [possible] vocation, yet, here i am at seminary! If someone truly has a vocation, God WILL find a way to put you where he wants you to be.


I'm not denying that. But completely ignoring your call because your parents or someone else important to you disapprove has happened many times before. I'm not saying that your vocation won't happen, I'm simply saying that instead of saying "No." you should instead nurture and support the vocation. A tree cannot grow without water. Though the Lord gives you enough water by himself, many find it increasingly difficult without direction. I have basically found all of the Communities that I'm discerning with on my own, but if my parents hadn't supported me I probably would never have even looked. I was so against it in the first place, and if my parents told me no I most likely would have had a huge sigh of relief.

#6 homeschoolmom

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 06:54 AM

I agree, but please don't forget that marriage is a dying vocation as well. I think many parents take for granted that their children will get married, but nowadays, this is not a given. So, while we *do* need to discuss religious vocations with our children, we also need to discuss marriage.

#7 Archaeology cat

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 08:18 AM

I pray for my children's vocations, that they will know where God is calling them and will live it out.

#8 FuturePriest387

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 08:45 AM

I agree, but please don't forget that marriage is a dying vocation as well. I think many parents take for granted that their children will get married, but nowadays, this is not a given. So, while we *do* need to discuss religious vocations with our children, we also need to discuss marriage.


Marriage is indeed dying, but the Religious vocation has been suppressed and denied since the Old Testament. Just seven centuries ago a young man named Thomas Aquinas felt a call from the Lord to join the Dominican order. However, his family had other plans in mind, so they hired a prostitute to seduce him. When she attempted to distract him from his vocation, he chased her out of the room with a hot firebrand. Imagine if this great saint, whom we know as “The Angelic Doctor of the Church,” had succumbed to her invitation. Marriage also has been suppressed in more recent times, and it too is starting to be degraded and hated upon, but it's merely feeling what Religious vocations have been feeling for centuries.

#9 FutureSister2009

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 09:24 AM

I hear stuff like this all the time. I wish parents would learn to be more supportive. If I'm not called to Religious Life, I would still encourage my children if they want to enter Religious Life. And I will continue to pray for Vocations too

#10 FuturePriest387

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 09:34 AM

I hear stuff like this all the time. I wish parents would learn to be more supportive. If I'm not called to Religious Life, I would still encourage my children if they want to enter Religious Life. And I will continue to pray for Vocations too


I do too. There is so much need to share the joy of Religious life. As the Carmelite Hermits in Wyoming say: "If everyone knew the joy of Religious life, the world would be empty, as everyone will have left to join a Monastery." Unfortunately for me, I'm not discerning with a Monastery, but I am discerning with the Franciscan Brothers Minor, and they have a Friary, which is close enough.

#11 homeschoolmom

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 09:57 AM

Marriage is indeed dying, but the Religious vocation has been suppressed and denied since the Old Testament. Just seven centuries ago a young man named Thomas Aquinas felt a call from the Lord to join the Dominican order. However, his family had other plans in mind, so they hired a prostitute to seduce him. When she attempted to distract him from his vocation, he chased her out of the room with a hot firebrand. Imagine if this great saint, whom we know as “The Angelic Doctor of the Church,” had succumbed to her invitation. Marriage also has been suppressed in more recent times, and it too is starting to be degraded and hated upon, but it's merely feeling what Religious vocations have been feeling for centuries.


I never said either/or (either we must pray for religious vocations or marriage). I whole-heartedly advocate both/and. We need to be mindful that marriage is no longer the "default" choice. .

#12 FuturePriest387

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 10:14 AM

I never said either/or (either we must pray for religious vocations or marriage). I whole-heartedly advocate both/and. We need to be mindful that marriage is no longer the "default" choice. .


I know. I advocate both most definitely, and I know that you were not meaning to say that we must support one or the other. Making your kids join the Religious life is just as bad as making them get married. I fully support both vocations, though I am quite biased towards Religious life. :P

#13 FutureCarmeliteClaire

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 08:07 PM

FP, I think you're kind of preaching to the choir on this one... :|

#14 FuturePriest387

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Posted 04 March 2012 - 08:50 PM

FP, I think you're kind of preaching to the choir on this one... :|


Not necessarily. Chances are there are some here who suppress vocations if it affects them (Or if they simply don't like the idea), and for those that do not, they sometimes don't support them as much as they should. I think we all do that to some extent. I somewhat encourage Religious vocations too much. I'm joking somewhat, but if someone says they are planning to get married I'll say something like "You should look into the Religious life instead!" Everyone needs preaching, including the choir and the preacher himself.

#15 mysisterisalittlesister

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Posted 05 March 2012 - 06:00 PM

I agree, but please don't forget that marriage is a dying vocation as well. I think many parents take for granted that their children will get married, but nowadays, this is not a given. So, while we *do* need to discuss religious vocations with our children, we also need to discuss marriage.

YES. After all, marriage makes people with religious vocations! :dance5:

#16 homeschoolmom

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Posted 06 March 2012 - 07:28 AM

Look at how long a typical woman (let's say) prepares for a religious vocation. I really have no idea, and I'm sure it varies. But there's a time as a postulate and a time as a novice before making final vows. Years of full-time discernment! The preparation for the priesthood is even longer-- years of study and preparation. By the time you are making vows, you know pretty clearly what you are doing.

What do most people do to prepare for marriage? Date. Dating is fine and dandy, but it's not really preparation for marriage. (ie You could just go on dating for years with no end in sight, as many people are now doing.) And, of course, there are people who will live together as "practice" for marriage. I won't even suggest that that is preparation for a holy marriage.

And once people do decide to marry, their marriage prep may consist of 6-10 discussion sessions, or something like that. The assumption being that a good, holy, Catholic marriage was modeled throughout the person's life. That would be great if such a thing were true! Alas, we don't live in that world. Lots of people go into marriage with no real clear idea of what they are doing. And, as I said, nowadays many people have decided that they aren't going to even marry at all. (And I don't mean so they can follow a religious vocation. ;) )

FP-- I agree that we should be encouraging our children to discern a religious vocation, but we should also be preparing them for a holy marriage if they are not called to religious life.

#17 i<3LSOP

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Posted 06 March 2012 - 08:00 AM

Look at how long a typical woman (let's say) prepares for a religious vocation. I really have no idea, and I'm sure it varies. But there's a time as a postulate and a time as a novice before making final vows. Years of full-time discernment! The preparation for the priesthood is even longer-- years of study and preparation. By the time you are making vows, you know pretty clearly what you are doing.

What do most people do to prepare for marriage? Date. Dating is fine and dandy, but it's not really preparation for marriage. (ie You could just go on dating for years with no end in sight, as many people are now doing.) And, of course, there are people who will live together as "practice" for marriage. I won't even suggest that that is preparation for a holy marriage.

And once people do decide to marry, their marriage prep may consist of 6-10 discussion sessions, or something like that. The assumption being that a good, holy, Catholic marriage was modeled throughout the person's life. That would be great if such a thing were true! Alas, we don't live in that world. Lots of people go into marriage with no real clear idea of what they are doing. And, as I said, nowadays many people have decided that they aren't going to even marry at all. (And I don't mean so they can follow a religious vocation. ;) )

FP-- I agree that we should be encouraging our children to discern a religious vocation, but we should also be preparing them for a holy marriage if they are not called to religious life.

Avvesome post! I agree, many on here and many devout Catholic people I know push vocations to religious life on their kids a bit too much. Discerners, and also parents need to be open.

Also, when a parent is pushing religious vocations from the time their kid is young... the child is often imagines that they have a vocation... when it's just that it happened to be that the rose in front of the alter really isn't a sign... because they put roses out before Mass every other week! I just feel that parents and children should be careful... and most children will grow up and become married and hopefully have a family.

^That's all. (sorry if I came across as abrupt, my friend's best friend died because of the tornadoes and it's difficult for me)

#18 FuturePriest387

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Posted 07 March 2012 - 09:18 PM

Avvesome post! I agree, many on here and many devout Catholic people I know push vocations to religious life on their kids a bit too much. Discerners, and also parents need to be open.

Also, when a parent is pushing religious vocations from the time their kid is young... the child is often imagines that they have a vocation... when it's just that it happened to be that the rose in front of the alter really isn't a sign... because they put roses out before Mass every other week! I just feel that parents and children should be careful... and most children will grow up and become married and hopefully have a family.

^That's all. (sorry if I came across as abrupt, my friend's best friend died because of the tornadoes and it's difficult for me)


I completely agree. Marriage these days is really hard to do with society and such. I'd say religious life and marriage both have their difficulties in today's world, and I think it would be fair to say that we need to prepare our children for both, whether we wed ourselves to a spouse or to Jesus the bride groom.

I am sorry to hear about this person. I will pray for him/her.

#19 elizabeth09

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Posted 07 March 2012 - 11:23 PM

That is a sad story. Some parents want their children to be happy. While others, are all about one vocation.