homeschoolmom Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 It's rather hard to have a civilized discussion when you start out proclaiming those who don't agree with you are "nutty." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beatitude Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 I've lived with guy friends before. I don't understand it when people express concerns about temptation. I don't think any guy is going to be overpowered with attraction for me when he sees my habit of leaving my grungy old socks in the bathroom. Equally, I am not going to sink into the clutches of rapacious lust for a male housemate who leaves his cereal bowl to fester in the sink for about six weeks. There was nothing sexual about that situation - just a group of friends in a house, with physical contact occurring only when I needed to frogmarch someone into the kitchen to do his dishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyAnn Posted March 27, 2012 Author Share Posted March 27, 2012 [quote name='homeschoolmom' timestamp='1332870151' post='2409231'] It's rather hard to have a civilized discussion when you start out proclaiming those who don't agree with you are "nutty." [/quote] All I meant was that there is a tendency there to make mountains out of molehills and turn every tiny little thing into a mortal sin. I have no doubts that they have the best of intentions, it's just sometimes unrealistic and unhelpful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixpence Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 I've lived in a house of 3 or 4 where one was a lab mate and a guy, it is very likely I will do it again this coming year!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lil Red Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 [quote name='EmilyAnn' timestamp='1332550930' post='2406717']Basically the question is it is sinful to have flatmates or housemates of the opposite sex? [/quote] yup. they're gonna burn in hell. so sry. i'm totally kidding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopefulBride Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 (edited) After graduating from college I moved in with one of my best friends who happens to be male. Being from a cultural where one doesn't live with someone who is not a relative or a spouse it was a bit hard for my parents to deal with. Eventually they realized that it was indeed the cheapest and safest choice I had and Mike and I shared a house for two years. I think as everyone says, you need to make sure your private living areas are secured. I had my own entrance and a lock on my bedroom door but even without my own entrance I felt secure in living with him. You want to make sure the person you live with is Someone whose judgements and morals you trust and agree with. Some of my guy friends I wouldnt live with not because of a near occasion of sin but because I know we'd end up arguing all the time about certain things. Edited March 27, 2012 by HopefulBride Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StClare_OraProNobis Posted April 11, 2012 Share Posted April 11, 2012 (edited) I think maybe I am the only one here who thinks that this would give scandal because it gives the appearance of sin and also not be prudent because attractions could develop. It is very naive to think that an attraction would not develop Ever have a guy friend and then out of the blue it turns into a crush? It is only natural and we need to be wise enough not to put ourselves in temptations way or to give others the wrong impression. Edited April 11, 2012 by StClare_OraProNobis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted April 11, 2012 Share Posted April 11, 2012 I agree to this, also. That's what I've been waiting for someone to bring up in this thread: the sin of [i]scandal[/i]. Regardless how chaste your relationship is with your opposite-sex roommate, it gives a pretty bad example, and could even cause others to decide to live in sin: "well so-and-so is living with a guy, and she's supposedly a good Catholic, I guess I can, too!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted April 11, 2012 Share Posted April 11, 2012 I want to add, that most of you here have stated that your relationships are way beyond chaste, there is no way you would ever even fall into any temptations with your housemates, etc. etc. AND That most of you believe it isn't causing scandal, but in reality... ...as holy as strong as most of you are, it is a pretty dangerous situation to place your souls in...i mean, i believe all of you saying that there is NO WAY you would ever even THINK of doing anything sinful with your housemates, etc.... and to that I commend all of you, but at the same time... satan is a very powerful spirit, and him and his minions are always searching the world for the ruin of HOLY souls... and you are giving him just enough ammunition to aim at you and fire... just something to think about... you never know how easy it can be to fall into the sins of the flesh even when you think there is no chance of that happening... ALSO...you have no idea whether or not your situations are causing scandal...do you speak individually with every single person who knows your living conditions or sees you from afar? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Autumn Dusk Posted April 11, 2012 Share Posted April 11, 2012 Honestly, I think it depends how big the house is, how many others live there and where the bathrooms are. In a large house with single gender bathrooms, where females occupy one end, males the other (or another floor) it's much like living in an apartment. In a 2 bedroom house where you share the bathroom and bedroom walls, it's asking for disaster. As a single person I've lived in my own apartment for years sometimes with opposite-gender housemates and never considered my housemates scandelous. We shared a common area downstairs where we could hang out and do laundry and we shared our outdoor area which we frequently spent time together in. We all had terribly small kitchens and non-existant dining rooms so we'd do what we could and ate together...or at the home of the neighbor behind us. I lived in a dorm that was segregated by floor. The girls and guys who were set on having sex had it. The rest of us didn't care. The most important part is segregated bathrooms. THAT is vital. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luigi Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) Just a note on terminology. Back in the 70's or 80's there was a term for what you're talking about, and it's easier to say than same-sex-housemate. Pronounce it POSS-L-CUE. Write it POSSLQ. Use it as a noun, as in, "My POSSLQ and I are hosting a party next week." It means Person of the Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters. Edited April 12, 2012 by Luigi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmotherofpirl Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 I lived in an all girls dorm in an all girls catholic college, and if people wanted to have sex, they had sex, every weekend in their rooms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missionseeker Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 I did, too. And they find the weirdest places to have sex... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissyP89 Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) Now[i] that [/i]is scandalous. Edited April 12, 2012 by MissyP89 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missionseeker Posted April 12, 2012 Share Posted April 12, 2012 you aren't the one who found two people in the bathroom where you work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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