Brief story about my life, for those who are interested: worked my arse of in high school, never slept like I was a manic freak. Mental and physical health negatively impacted. Graduated valedictorian, got rejected from most of the schools I applied to. Learned hard work and honesty =/= success. Went to a state-school, paid out-of-state tuition tho. Had an emotional/mental breakdown from years of accumulating depression and anxiety and suicidal ideation (but I hate when people say "oh yeah, college is usually when these problems appear" or whatever cause lemme tell you, I knew something was wrong with me pretty much from adolescence on, I just finally broke, and I now knew the name of the particular mental ailment I suffered).
So I had to leave school, mid-semester. Major depressed. Live no want. Went to therapist. God bless her heart she tried, but it was a major fail. Went months and months. I heard about a study they were conducting for people with social anxiety in Boston, but the thought of calling them caused serious anxiety. So spring, sad. Summer, more sad. Fall, I finally emailed the study. Then they called me. I was accepted. So I got free meds and psychiatric appointments. Which was clutch because I was uninsured at the time. They were remarkably understanding about the disorder I had (for example, when I first went in, I didn't even need to check in, they had someone come and get me. For someone who has suffered this anxiety, you know how daunting a simple checking-in can be).
Threw me on some meds. Zoloft at first. Made me a little sick. Was a bit awkward (as it always is) talking to a stranger about your deepest problems and such. Didn't work at first. Emotional bluntness and all. Disappoint.
Then, something peculiar happened. I actually started to feel good. In fact, I actually started enjoying this whole existence thing. It may sound crazy to people, but for as long as I could remember I had anxiety (which grew worse and worse) and for about half of my life I was so depressed, that the most I ever really hoped was that living would become tolerable. And even THAT seemed like it was never gonna happen, but that was as high as I was aiming.
Fast forward a few years, got my first real job (my first job was pretty much the result of nepotism), made some FRIENDS (ok so it was on the internet but they grew into the "real world." Hey one step at a time right?" Had some bumps in the road with learning how to be social and stumbling through it kinda like a baby deer (a fawn?) trying to find its legs, but hey life isn't perfect.
So about two years later, I'm finally ready to go back to skool and get my learnin papers git done. I reapply to my old school (I was on medical/psych leave so it was easier than reapplying to new skoolz). Got accepted back in, but sad news, did not get my scholarship back
. SO even tho I'm not living on campus anymore and commuting, we're not saving the money that we thot we were going to.croutons, I think I have to transfer. I hate the idea of transferring and getting recommendation letters and all is super daunting for a lass like me. I meet with my adviser to talk semester plans and mention my predicament.
He notified the VP of student services or, something like that, and not only do I get my scholarship back, but I got a credit retroactively applied to the semesters that I (well my parents really) already paid for! I was worried I wouldn't get my out-of-state grant for next year, but I did! AND I got an extra $800 scholarship for an added surprise.
TL;DR So basically I have so much grant/scholarship money I don't even think I'm gonna need to take out loans this semester! And even if I do, my financial aid package covers me for the whole year so I (or my lovely parents) won't have to pay anything out of pocket for the next two (maybe three) semesters!!
Proof that God loves me the most. JK, but it's looking like I won't have a poo ton of debt to pay off when I graduate and that's just gr8!
