cmaD2006 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Hi everyone: I am physically in pain. A literal pain-in-the-neck that just will not go away. There is one sure fire way to make it go away -- injections. Which, unluckily, insurance wise I cannot get again until late september (the last doctor did them wrong -- hence I have symptoms now). Well, I've decided to come into the lame board to get some cheering-up, to ask you all to come up with ways to get me to laugh so hard that my stomach hurts from laughing. And hence, forget about that neck pain! Who's in first? Come on ... Groo ... Mlkoble .... Lil Red ... dUSt ... MissyP ... brandelynmarie ... krissylou ... Limoncita ( ;-) ) arfink ... Maximoooo ... anyone else I forgot ... ... yall can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCarmeliteClaire Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 What does a pepper do? Gets jalepeno face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 An illegal alien, a Muslim and [color="#000000"]a socialist walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be Mr. President?"[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinaSt.Cecilia2772 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBSYD0dQCAw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 i got nothing. so sry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maximilianus Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 estoy lastimado que no pensaste en mi primero. por eso te dejo con esto, para que sufras mas [spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][spoiler][img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_hfirdv34n7A/S2aWNTuAojI/AAAAAAAADhM/Qj6vyvAXFpE/s1600/EL%2BKABONG%2B(8).png[/img][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler][/spoiler] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmaD2006 Posted August 23, 2012 Author Share Posted August 23, 2012 Maximo te la ganaste! I don't believe it ... ya remembered. I just saw him a few days ago too . Keep 'em coming. Thanks pham! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groo the Wanderer Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure hasta banana Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinaSt.Cecilia2772 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8aprCNnecU&feature=related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhuturePriest Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 This is a true story. Once my spiritual director and my family were talking about Catholic youth camps and how in our area they are always so liberal, and he said every time someone asks him to help out by doing a speech or something he always replies "Sorry, us Germans are sensitive to camps. It brings up bad memories." He's a riot. A conservative, a liberal, and a moderate walked into a bar. The bartender says "What will it be, Mr. Romney?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ContemporaryCaflicCrusader Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 I run by a mailbox on a regular basis with the last name Astholz on it. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 (edited) [font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]A Franciscan and Jesuit were debating which order was the greatest. So, they decided to ask for a sign from God. This is what they received falling down from heaven: [/size][/font] [indent=1][font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]My sons, Please stop bickering about such trivial matters, Sincerely, God, O.P.[/size][/font][/indent] [indent=1][font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]----[/size][/font][/indent] [indent=1][font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]A little boy was listening to a long and excessively boring sermon in church. Suddenly his eye the red sanctuary lamp caught his eye. Tugging his father's sleeve, he said, "Daddy, when the light turns green can we go?" [/size][/font][/indent] [indent=1][font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]--[/size][/font][/indent] [indent=1][font=arial,helvetica,sans-serif][size=3]The Pope goes to New York. He is picked up at the airport by a limousine. He looks at the beautiful car and says to the driver, "You know, I hardly ever get to drive. Would you please let me?" The driver is understandably hesistant and says, "I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm supposed to do that." But the Pope persists, "Please?" The driver finally lets up. "Oh, all right, I can't really say no to the Pope." So the Pope takes the wheel, and boy, is he a speed demon! He hits the gas and goes around 100 mph in a 45 zone. A policeman notices and pulls him over. The cop walks up and asks the Pope to roll down the window. Startled and surprised, the young officer asks the Pope to wait a minute. He goes back to his patrol car and radios the chief. Cop: Chief, I have a problem. Chief: What sort of problem? Cop: Well, you see, I pulled over this guy for driving way over the speed limit but it's someone really important. Chief: Important like the mayor? Cop: No, no, much more important than that. Chief: Important like the governor? Cop: Wayyyyyy more important than that. Chief: Like the president? Cop: More. Chief: Who's more important than the president? Cop: I don't know, but he's got the Pope driving for him! [/size][/font][/indent] Edited August 23, 2012 by BG45 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arfink Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Hrm, put me on the spot will ya. Well, how's this? I know, it's geek humor, but it's good. [img]http://dilbert.com/dyn/str_strip/000000000/00000000/0000000/100000/60000/5000/800/165853/165853.strip.gif[/img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BG45 Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 A priest and a bus driver both died and went to Heaven at the same time. They get to the pearly gates where Pope St. Peter greets them. He motions to the priest, and they both hop in a jeep and go out the back door. There are about 50 acres of rolling hills with a little cottage on the knoll. St. Peter turns to the priest and says "This will be yours for eternity. A perfect little cottage, right next to lovely pond, a lush little garden, and a library full of books." The priest says, "Thank you so much. This I shall enjoy!" St. Peter drops off the priest, goes back to the pearly gates and motions to the bus driver. They hop in a stretch limo and go out the front door. There are about 500 acres of land, with mountains and lakes and rivers. There is a huge 200-room castle on one of the mountains, and a wishing well that makes wishes come true. St. Peter says "This will be yours for eternity. You can live in that castle with servants to wait on you hand and foot, and you can have everything you want." The bus driver looks and St. Peter and says "Well, now, don't think I'm not grateful, but why am I getting so much more than the priest?" St. Peter just laughs and says "You brought more souls to Heaven! When the priest preached, everyone fell asleep. When you drove your bus, people prayed!" -- Lost on a rainy Friday night, a priest stumbles into a monastery and requests shelter there. Fortunately, he's just in time for dinner and was treated to the best fish and chips he's ever had. After dinner, he goes into the kitchen to thank the chefs. He is met by two brothers, "Hello, I'm Brother Michael, and this is Brother Francis." "I'm very pleased to meet you. I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner. The fish and chips were the best I've ever tasted. Out of curiosity, who cooked what?" Brother Michael replied, "Well, I'm the fish friar." Father turns to the other brother and says, "Then you must be...." "Yes, I'm afraid I'm the chip monk..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not The Philosopher Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 [url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGlURmUBJdY&feature=player_embedded"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGlURmUBJdY&feature=player_embedded[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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