Funny things kids say

[MarysLittleFlower]

Inspired by the "what Saint are you" thread true story I witnessed. A teacher tells a kindergarten class:

Teacher: "Soon, we will have a visitor from the church. Can anyone guess who it will be?"

Child 1: "God?"

Teacher: "Good answer, but no, anyone else?"

Child 2: "Jesus?"

Teacher: "its someone who works for Him".

Child 3: "Mary?"

Child 4: "St Joseph?"

...they never got it 

[MarysLittleFlower]

I'm sure others have stories too so I thought I'd start a thread!

[beatitude]

I have a few.  My sister decided to enroll my nephew in a Catholic school, even though she isn't Catholic herself and doesn't attend any church. At this school there is a special Mass for the children on Thursday mornings that they all have to attend. One day, wanting to check my nephew's religious understanding, I asked him, "Do you know what Mass is?" He replied matter-of-factly, "Yes, it's when Father Pearce goes to the front and eats that teabag."

...I was too stunned to say anything for a few moments (and it isn't often that I'm at a loss for words).

Another story involves my youngest cousin. He was three years old when my aunt took him to church for the first time, and she told him that they would have to be very good because they were going to God's house. My cousin got very quiet on the way there and sat through the entrance hymn as still as a statue...until Fr Aelred opened his mouth to begin, whereupon my cousin called out delightedly, "Hello God!" The congregation was in stitches. A few weeks later there was a substitute priest, and right after the Confiteor, he got a greeting too: "Hello, God's brother!" (My cousin has two older brothers at home, and it must have taken him the length of the opening prayers to reason out who this new fellow at the altar must be.)

[NadaTeTurbe]

I heard this one from an old lady : 

Little girl : "Later, I want to be a virgin !"

Mother : "why ?" 

Little girl : "Because I want a baby !" 

[AgnesHolyInnocents]

My daughters recently asked me if left handed people make the sign of the cross with their right hand. I thought they wanted to know so they would be prepared, just in case, they ever met a left handed person and needed to teach them how to make the sign of the cross.

 

[Luigi]

My nephew was in first grade when Pope Francis was elected. I guess I mentioned "the new pope" in front of him, and he said, "Who's the pope?" 

I said, "He's in charge of the whole Catholic Church." 

He thought for a second and said - a little angry, because I apparently was throwing him a curve ball, "I thought God was in charge of the whole Church!"

The only possible response was, "Right you are, buddy!"

 

[Gabriela]

Check out 1:52:

 

[Amppax]

A funny one from this past weekend. Two of my uncles (and myself) came to my hometown for my grandpa's birthday. My cousin was explaining this to his kids, and his son, who is going into 1st grade, asked, "Which one just got out of prison?" Correct answer: none of us. 

[AveMariaPurissima]

Father shared some cute ones during his homily this morning!  For example, some little kid interpretations of the act of contrition: "O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended You, and I digest all my sins..."  or also "...I contest all my sins..."

Also: little kids explaining the mysteries of the rosary:

The Presentation: "Do you remember the name of the old man in the temple who had waited so long to be able to see baby Jesus?" 

"Father Cinnamon!"

Or another kid's explanation of what the Assumption is:  After Mary died, the apostles went to Mary's tomb.  Since they couldn't find her body, they assumed she was in Heaven."

 

I also just came across this and thought it was the sweetest thing:

[HopefulHeart]

When I was a kid, I confused the name Mary Magdalene with the name of an older woman who went to my family's parish. This lady's name was Mary and her last initial was M, so it was easy for me to get the names mixed up. One day, my dad was giving me some religious instruction at home and asked me a question about a woman in the Bible. The correct answer was Mary Magdalene, but I named the lady from church!

Edited August 15, 2015 by HopefulHeart

[Ancilla Domini]

I was hanging out with a little girl yesterday and we were talking about hair-ties. She said, "Sometimes I put them around my wrist. But they can be too tight, and then I get a blood circulation! Have you ever had a blood circulation?"

[AveMariaPurissima]

So I'm a teacher's aide for 2nd grade catechism, and Wednesday evening I was handing out rosaries to the kids. (we always start class with a decade of the rosary.)  The teacher mentioned to them that the rosaries were blessed, and I heard one little girl say in awe, "It smells blessed!"

[Sponsa-Christi]

One time I was preparing a group of seven-year-olds for their first Confession, and we were going over the "steps" for receiving the sacrament. At one point, I asked the class: "So what do you do if you're in the confessional, and you suddenly can't remember any of your sins?" (The right answer was something along the lines of "ask Father for help.")

One boy was very excited because he apparently knew the right answer, and he raised his hand right away. When I called on him, he said proudly: "You make some up!"

It took a lot of effort to keep from cracking up laughing in front of the class! 

[AccountDeleted]

My daughter didn't say anything funny but when she and her class were 'practising' to receive First Communion, they all lined up to take a sip of wine. When it was her turn, she took a sip and then made a horrible face at the taste, almost like 'yucch'! Her teacher said, 'Now you aren't going to make that face when you really receive First Communion, are you? My daughter was very embarrassed because she hadn't meant to make the face - she had just never tasted wine before and didn't like it. She shook her head and said, 'No ma'am!'

On the day, she had First Communion she was fine and didn't make any faces!