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Didacus    270
Didacus

Where do people in hell tell each other to go?

If my son becomes a priest, should I call him father?

Is it possible to set a ball down up-side down?

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IgnatiusofLoyola    1,192
IgnatiusofLoyola

If my son becomes a priest, should I call him father?

 

I had a relative-in-law who was so proud that her son became a priest that she INSISTED that everyone call him "Father"--even in casual casual conversation in non-religious settings with people who had helped change his diapers when he was a baby. Not to mention that the new priest was too much of a dweeb to tell his mother that (at least outside of religious settings) relatives could call him by his first name.  <_<

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Didacus    270
Didacus

I had a relative-in-law who was so proud that her son became a priest that she INSISTED that everyone call him "Father"--even in casual casual conversation in non-religious settings with people who had helped change his diapers when he was a baby. Not to mention that the new priest was too much of a dweeb to tell his mother that (at least outside of religious settings) relatives could call him by his first name.  <_<

​give respect where respect is due

Edited by Didacus
I wanted to edit my post

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IgnatiusofLoyola    1,192
IgnatiusofLoyola

​give respect where respect is due

​Actually, I think most people were quite willing and happy to give their relative his due as a priest. But, his mother was so obnoxious and demanding about it that it left a bad taste in people's mouths. Also, she came across as "Look, MY son is a priest. What has YOUR son accomplished?" Maybe you had to be there to understand. :idontknow:I didn't feel people were disrespectful at all--they were very happy for new priest. 

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Didacus    270
Didacus

​Actually, I think most people were quite willing and happy to give their relative his due as a priest. But, his mother was so obnoxious and demanding about it that it left a bad taste in people's mouths. Also, she came across as "Look, MY son is a priest. What has YOUR son accomplished?" Maybe you had to be there to understand. :idontknow:I didn't feel people were disrespectful at all--they were very happy for new priest. 

​Does affect due respect towards the father.

What I find saddest in that circumstance, is that in a certain respect, the man becoming a priest loses his family as they no longer look to him as a brother, or sibling, or uncle or other.  A certain family dimension is lost.

All joking aside, I would be thrilled should one of my sons become a priest, but first and foremost I would be happy for him, then I would need an enormous effort to contain and control my pride.  I would in public refer to him as father (perhaps as <my son and my father> at the same time?), but would not rob him of his father on earth when in the intimacy of private family life.  

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Luigi    3,349
Luigi

​Actually, I think most people were quite willing and happy to give their relative his due as a priest. But, his mother was so obnoxious and demanding about it that it left a bad taste in people's mouths. Also, she came across as "Look, MY son is a priest. What has YOUR son accomplished?" Maybe you had to be there to understand. :idontknow:I didn't feel people were disrespectful at all--they were very happy for new priest. 

​Iggy - In culturally Catholic circles, this is called My Son The Priest Syndrome. In secular circles, it presents itself as My Son The Doctor Syndrome or My Son The Lawyer Syndrome. 

A son becoming a priest does - or at least, can - change the family dynamic, as Didacus says. I've seen it happen. But a mother who insists to other people how they should refer to her son is still exerting her maternal authority over her son - she hasn't really let go of him even to the degree that a parent should let go of any adult child. 

Parents should be proud of their children's accomplishments, but they have to recognize that those accomplishments rightfully belong to the child (support and encouraged, perhaps enabled by the parents). But too much pride can be hard to swallow.  

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