mulls Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 Ah, the beauty of the anonymous message board where people know you but never really will... Well anyways, I'll let you know about my own little female situation... She's one of my best friends, I've known her for 2 years, we've been working closely together with the ministry at school, running a large bible study together with 2 other friends. Our personalities are very, very, very different but we've really grown to embrace each other as friends. The foundation of our friendship is Christ. I'm 2 years older than her, and have very much adopted a big-brother type role in her life, giving her advice how to fend off all of the heathens that try to date her, among other things. She has opened up about her life to me alot more within the past few months, seeking advice and wisdom from me, and I'm blessed that I'm able to serve someone in this way. Of course this is somebody who I never, ever would have considered dating, because we're such different people, and not until recently did I feel like I was in a place to pursue something like that with anyone, and I certainly know that she deals with enough constant junk from men that she doesn't need something like that in her life. But now that I've been graduated from college for about a month, I miss her intensely. I went and visited her and some other friends on a missions project they were on in NJ, and once I got back from that I missed her even more. I've come to realize that as she has let me into her life, my heart has grown immensely for her. As far as qualities in a girl, forget it, she's the total package. The main issue is the whole "risk putting a great friendship in jeopardy" thing vs. the whole "enter into a godly relationship with someone who you might end up marrying" thing. Risk vs. Reward. Oh and the funny part is, people would always say to me "you know, you can't be that good of friends with a girl, because it will end up getting tricky." And I'm like "whatever, we know where we stand with each other, it's all good." Who would have known that I would actually fall for a gorgeous, godly, Christ-centered, intelligent, polite, beautiful, honest, compassionate girl such as her. I mean who actually is attracted to those qualities? Ahhh life is fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 Risk vs. Reward? Cost-benefit analysis is not the way to deal with love...total submission is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mulls Posted June 18, 2005 Author Share Posted June 18, 2005 well that's the thing, I'm trying to be totally submitted to God in this situation, and totally submitted to honoring her....to the point where if this is not the best thing for her, than I will back off. like I said, the risk is the situation blowing up in my face and wrecking a beautiful friendship. the reward would be be taking a beautiful friendship further into a beautiful personal relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
homeschoolmom Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 ah, life... so full of risks... btw, congratulations on graduating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mulls Posted June 18, 2005 Author Share Posted June 18, 2005 thanks hs. basically I've already decided that I'm gonna take a shot at it, unless the Lord puts the stop sign up for me. now it's a matter of how do I break it....phone call, letter, or surprise 5 hour trip to where she's at for the summer? and when do I break it.....soon, so it won't be a thorn in my side all summer, or wait until she gets back so that this situation does not distract her from the Lord? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philothea Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 Send flowers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 [quote name='mulls' date='Jun 17 2005, 09:44 PM']well that's the thing, I'm trying to be totally submitted to God in this situation, and totally submitted to honoring her....to the point where if this is not the best thing for her, than I will back off. like I said, the risk is the situation blowing up in my face and wrecking a beautiful friendship. the reward would be be taking a beautiful friendship further into a beautiful personal relationship. [right][snapback]614920[/snapback][/right] [/quote] I've been where you are. If you want to chat in private, you're welcome to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mulls Posted June 18, 2005 Author Share Posted June 18, 2005 haha thanks man, i really appreciate that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jp2_rules Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 i know what you mean about taking a risk of messing up what you have. a couple things, though. 1.) you wondering may make things awkwatd anyway at some point. i've been there, and even though it's to bring up, it's better in the long run. 2.) if your friendship is as good as it sounds, it shouldn't matter. if you both have an understanding, it sahouldn't ruin your relationship. peace bro, chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
God Conquers Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 Do it. 'nuff said. If it's God's plan, and you feel it is, go for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueufo7 Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 I vote sending flowers! (women LOVE flowers... and chocolates!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iggy Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 my favorite flowers are dandylions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bx_racer Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 (edited) go for it! it takes guts but before you know it it will be over with. i couldnt believe i had just asked a girl out the first time i asked a girl out. Edited June 18, 2005 by littleflower+JMJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 Love is tough. I know the feelings. I practically had to hit Teresa over the head with a club and drag her back to my cave. I'll say a prayer for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaime Posted June 18, 2005 Share Posted June 18, 2005 [quote name='blueufo7' date='Jun 17 2005, 11:23 PM']I vote sending flowers! (women LOVE flowers... and chocolates!) [right][snapback]615062[/snapback][/right] [/quote] And large bricks of processed coagulated milk!! coagulated milk makes everything better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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