bmb144 Posted July 11, 2007 Share Posted July 11, 2007 ***hugs*** GodChild, here if you need an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on or a warm hug. Just PM me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodChild Posted July 12, 2007 Author Share Posted July 12, 2007 [quote]Have you thought of maybe volunteering and doing something to help children or others?I work two jobs,but maybe when I retire from my first job,I could be a child advocate for the state I live in,with of course proper training which they give you. Some religious orders have lay associates,you know,people who help them in their work.Perhasp if you got invovled in some activities helping others,you could make even just a little difference in their lives.It would be a small start to perhasp later taking on bigger things since you feel so passionately about it.[/quote] I do volunteer work. I have done volunteer work for many years, in legal centres and organizations that assist disabled ppl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodChild Posted July 12, 2007 Author Share Posted July 12, 2007 I am so angry and so full of hate, its starting to scare me ... all I can do is think of ALL the years, (sixteen) and counting - thats one third of my life! All the misery and guilt and when I open my mouth it's "for God's glory" - this may be sinning but I am beyond caring at this point in time .... I do NOT care about God's glory, I care about MYSELF now despite how 'sinful' that may be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ora et Labora Posted July 12, 2007 Share Posted July 12, 2007 [quote name='GodChild' post='1318165' date='Jul 8 2007, 04:43 AM'] Not helping, I am getting more and more grumpy[/quote] then don't come on here anymore. I think that you coming on PM has nothing to do with becoming a better person...it has to do with ranting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodChild Posted July 12, 2007 Author Share Posted July 12, 2007 [quote name='Ora et Labora' post='1324770' date='Jul 12 2007, 11:18 AM']then don't come on here anymore. I think that you coming on PM has nothing to do with becoming a better person...it has to do with ranting.[/quote] I didn't realise I was ranting, and your words have hurt me deeper than you can imagine. I won't be back. Bye everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ora et Labora Posted July 12, 2007 Share Posted July 12, 2007 i tend to be insensitive in sensitive situations. It is one of my weaknesses. I did not mean to hurt you. I apologize if I hurt you very badly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodChild Posted July 17, 2007 Author Share Posted July 17, 2007 [quote name='Ora et Labora' post='1324857' date='Jul 12 2007, 01:10 PM']i tend to be insensitive in sensitive situations. It is one of my weaknesses. I did not mean to hurt you. I apologize if I hurt you very badly.[/quote] You did "Christs maiden" .... regardless I was ready to kill myself over the last couple of days, but i wont just to spite you and the "catholic" ilk who have ALWAYS hurt me. Despite how you judge me, I am not an evil person ... I admit I have written in anger and hurt in this post during a period that has been very emotional for me, though it wasn't directed at anyone in particular - it was like an infection spewing out of a very deep and irritated wound, just being thrown out into the open. Perhaps a forum isnt the best place to vent how i feel .... though when I did speak of how i felt it was to the only ppl I have to open my mouth to. Unlike many ppl (not all but very many) i have NO family or friends, I have no one ... phatmass is the only place where i have contact with others who share my faith. anyways, i realise and see that your rebuke to me that I am "ranting" is only Jesus speaking to me through you, and bluntly he is telling me to get lost. Funny thing is, though I hurt myself quiet badly yesterday, these are the last scars and last injury I will bear because of "catholicism" I AM interested in being a better person ... it is what I strive for - and I realise that I will NEVER be a better person in this religion .... so for the sake of my sanity and well-being I have decided to leave, and for the first time, i feel FREE from now on, you are going to be hearing from a happier catholic-free GodChild .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starets Posted July 17, 2007 Share Posted July 17, 2007 I don't know what to say, GodChild. I certainly do not hate you. I will continue to pray for your emotional, physical, and spiritual healing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noel's angel Posted July 17, 2007 Share Posted July 17, 2007 (edited) The actions of a few men do not mean that they are the fruits of Catholicism. You must make a distinction between what men do and what God wills. Edited July 17, 2007 by Noel's angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruviel Posted July 17, 2007 Share Posted July 17, 2007 If people hurt you why do you blame God? Why are you angry with Him? Just because He is our Father that does NOT mean He is responsible for our evil actions. I cannot tell you how sorry I am for what happened. I cannot tell you how I wish I could help, I cannot even begin to put myself in your position. But the fact is God didn't do it, just as parents can't be responsible for their childrens actions once they are adults, so God cannot. He gave these men and women free wills, and they use them for Him or Satan. I am sorry for the pain, for the hurt, for the marks that others actions have left on you. But if you only turn to God, just ask Him. You already said yourself you are too small for Him, then why do you plan on relying on yourself? Why? Why are you fighting with yourself? You don't want to go to heaven? You don't want to go to hell? Well I'll tell you this much you have to go somewhere. Just think about this question for a moment: Satan or God. Who would you prefer? Who deserves you? Who will die on the cross again for you? You are triggering your hate on God, He does not deserve it. And yes, I will pray for you. You are tired of love? Which would you prefer, love or hate? God will help you. Ask and listen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chiquitunga Posted July 18, 2007 Share Posted July 18, 2007 Dear GodChild, I was just reminded of this thread reading a recent Q&A at the Catholic Answers Forum. It's a bit off topic, but related, regarding suffering and God's Love. Suffering is probably [i]the[/i] most difficult subject in Catholicism, at least I find it so. It is easy to talk about it theologically, but actually experiencing it is a whole other story. [url="http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=168791"]How does one explain the necessity of Christ´s crucifixion in light of an all-loving God?[/url] God bless! Margaret Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farglefeezlebut Posted July 18, 2007 Share Posted July 18, 2007 (hugs) First of all, get away from the Church you are at. Get away from there [b][i][u]now[/u][/i][/b].Go to a Church where you will not be abused. Move if you have to. I think you need to see a counsellor about what happenned to you. Do this as soon as possible. You need to talk to the police about what happenned to you. If you don't feel ready, don't feel under pressure to do so straight away, but do so as soon as you can. Pray. God did not want this tyo happen to you. He is not responsible for any of this. Trust that He will comfort you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XIX Posted July 19, 2007 Share Posted July 19, 2007 If you mean moving to a different parish, then I agree with that. But if you mean moving from the Catholic Church, then I don't think that is going to help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigid Posted July 21, 2007 Share Posted July 21, 2007 GodChild, I just wanted you to know that you have my prayers, and the prayers of our Blessed Mother ('cause I asked her to pray for you... but she was probably praying for you before I asked). I dont' have any words of wisdom... just a hug and prayers. hope they help. *bighug* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodChild Posted July 22, 2007 Author Share Posted July 22, 2007 [quote]First of all, get away from the Church you are at. Get away from there now.Go to a Church where you will not be abused. Move if you have to.[/quote] I have left Church and haven't been to Mass for a week now. It feels strangely liberating not having to listen to perpetual crucifixion anymore. I go to the beach or lake instead, or watch the mountains behind my home and the sun rising and setting over them ... I can see God there and I can see he is NOT perpetually dying. I have come across a 'philosophy' - not a religion - that is helping me .... I'll see how it goes, but so far I am regaining my peace and strength and I am not angry or raging anymore - I have learnt with the help of the 'way' i have found that the 'god' of the Church is not worth being angry over, neither are his followers - they will both eventually choke on the hatred and evil they live off ... they inhale hatred and ignorence and therefore exhale the same, and ultimately hatred devours and consumes itself. At this stage I won't mention what I have found ... I feel like I have found a treasure and am keeping a secret like a little school girl, but in time I will share it with you. I'm actually smiling for the first time in what seems centuries : I think I'm on the road up from here. [quote]You need to talk to the police about what happenned to you. If you don't feel ready, don't feel under pressure to do so straight away, but do so as soon as you can.[/quote] The police? LOL I know, I will go to them ... though I wouldnt expect much of them. How should I put it ... they kind of smell of elderberries when it comes to doing anything Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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