Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
friendofJPII

Non-traditional Wedding Dresses

Non-traditional wedding dresses  

119 members have voted

You do not have permission to vote in this poll, or see the poll results. Please sign in or register to vote in this poll.

Recommended Posts

Deeds
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604182' date='Jul 21 2008, 02:04 AM']But I've seen Catholics in some of these dresses! Should the Church not hold some guidelines as to what dress is accpetable to wear at a nuptial mass? Wedding dresses traditionaly (for almost 200) years have met the standard of white, long, modest, and elegant. It should bring out a woman's true femine beauty.[/quote]
Basically, you think the Church should be telling Catholics to follow a secular tradition that was started by a queen in 1840 and wasn't commonly adopted by the masses until the 20th century, just because it looks nice. I'd be very suprised if there is any Catholic basis to the popular belief that white symbolises virginity. This was not the original point of choosing a white dress - rather, it showed that the woman was wealthy enough to buy a dress that wouldn't be worn again. Edited by Deeds

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friendofJPII
[quote name='Deeds' post='1604366' date='Jul 21 2008, 07:07 AM']Basically, you think the Church should be telling Catholics to follow a secular tradition that was started by a queen in 1840 and wasn't commonly adopted by the masses until the 20th century, just because it looks nice. I'd be very suprised if there is any Catholic basis to the popular belief that white symbolises virginity. This was not the original point of choosing a white dress - rather, it showed that the woman was wealthy enough to buy a dress that wouldn't be worn again.[/quote]

yes, but white does symbolize purity in our Church...hence, the white, spotless, garment that is put on the baby at baptism.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Barbarus
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604364' date='Jul 21 2008, 07:50 AM']Even if the tradition is relatively "new" (but 175 years is a rather long time). 6-7 generations of women have associated a white wedding dress with a new bride. Considering that our country isn't much older, I think it is safe to say that the long, white wedding dress has been an American tradition.[/quote]
You seem to be confusing American tradition (or at least Western tradition) with Catholic tradition. Just because this is how many people have done it does not mean it is how all people do it around the world. I'm quite certain that brides in other cultures do not wear white dresses, and as far as I know there has been no official pronouncement.

If you want to wear white, I'm sure that you'll be able to do so ... but it is not necessary that everyone do that or adhere to a "tradition" simply because you find it aesthetically appealing.

[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604374' date='Jul 21 2008, 09:01 AM']yes, but white does symbolize purity in our Church...hence, the white, spotless, garment that is put on the baby at baptism.[/quote]
Again, this is a Western tradition, not necessarily a Catholic one. And as was mentioned above, this too is likely historically based more on wealth.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StColette
[quote name='Barbarus' post='1604379' date='Jul 21 2008, 09:13 AM']Again, this is a Western tradition, not necessarily a Catholic one. And as was mentioned above, this too is likely historically based more on wealth.[/quote]

I agree. If you look toward the Jewish tradition, especially during the times accounted in the Bible, the color blue was the symbol for purity and virginity, which is why Our Lady is shown in blue or with a blue viel.

I wore white for my wedding, but I wasn't against people wearing a color or having a color on my dress. The one that I found and fell in love with just happened to be white. A friend of mine fell in love with a almost pearl color dress that had a light pink sash. It was beautiful.

Color doesn't matter and it should not. Many women who can't afford the nice white dress have gotten married and have had beautiful wedding ceremonies in clothes that were much less elegant. And just because they weren't wearing white or weren't in a nice white dress didn't make them seem anyless pure or spotless. Believe me on your wedding day you'll forget all about the dress. It was wonderful getting dressed up but even more wonderful giving and receiving a Sacrament.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friendofJPII
If white has no religious meaning, then why are babies clothed in a white bapitismal garment? Why do little girls wear white for thier first holy communion? We were encouraged to wear white for our confirmation. Maybe I'll get used to it eventually, but I'm sad to see the tradition of the long, white, elegant wedding dress go. Although, I think Our Lord and Our Lady are probaby more bothered by the strapless/and/or very fitted gowns worn nowadays.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StColette
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604408' date='Jul 21 2008, 10:06 AM']If white has no religious meaning, then why are babies clothed in a white bapitismal garment? Why do little girls wear white for thier first holy communion? We were encouraged to wear white for our confirmation. Maybe I'll get used to it eventually, but I'm sad to see the tradition of the long, white, elegant wedding dress go. Although, I think Our Lord and Our Lady are probaby more bothered by the strapless/and/or very fitted gowns worn nowadays.[/quote]

I didn't say that white didn't have religious meaning. White does have religious meaning, I mean look at the priest's vestments on certain days throughout the liturgical year. The only rite within the Church for a sacrament that requires the person to wear white is after a child is baptized. In the Byzantine Rite the infant wears the Baptismal garment for 8 days and then on the 8th there is a rite to remove it. I don't think a Bride could last that long in a wedding dress lol. The point is the Church does not require that a woman wear white on her wedding day nor is it a strong enough tradition historically to demand that a woman do so. It really should not matter what you are wearing on that day as long as it is tasteful. That day isn't about your wedding dress; it's about the Sacrament of Matrimony. When Micah and I got engaged, I told him I would marry him in a potato sack if I had to because the dress really doesn't matter.

Did a little research, and the white garment at baptism signifies according to the CCC that the person baptized has ‘put on Christ,’ has risen with Christ. Again Baptism is the only sacrament that I have found that a white garment is mentioned as being worn according to the Rite of the Church.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friendofJPII
[i]When Micah and I got engaged, I told him I would marry him in a potato sack if I had to because the dress really doesn't matter.[/i]

Yes it does. The same arguement could be made for those who come to mass dressed like they are going to the beach. I believe the even the poorest woman can find a nice, elegant, and modest dress to wear on her wedding day. It doesn't have to be new. And if the couple is so financially strapped that they can't afford proper attire, I doubt they are in financial position to get married, anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StColette
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604440' date='Jul 21 2008, 11:22 AM']Yes it does. The same arguement could be made for those who come to mass dressed like they are going to the beach. I believe the even the poorest woman can find a nice, elegant, and modest dress to wear on her wedding day. It doesn't have to be new. And if the couple is so financially strapped that they can't afford proper attire, I doubt they are in financial position to get married, anyway.[/quote]

I'll just leave it at this. On your wedding day it really isn't going to matter to you what you are wearing. I could have cared less if I were wearing burnt orange or white. I believe many women would share the same opinion. That in the end, on that day it really didn't matter.

The point is the Church doesn't demand that we wear white or any color for that matter. It does demand that it be something tasteful and modest though some priests are more lax with this than others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lil Red
+J.M.J.+
[quote name='StColette' post='1604398' date='Jul 21 2008, 07:46 AM']Color doesn't matter and it should not. Many women who can't afford the nice white dress have gotten married and have had beautiful wedding ceremonies in clothes that were much less elegant. And just because they weren't wearing white or weren't in a nice white dress didn't make them seem anyless pure or spotless. Believe me on your wedding day you'll forget all about the dress. It was wonderful getting dressed up but even more wonderful giving and receiving a Sacrament.[/quote]
well said. :))

[quote name='StColette' post='1604430' date='Jul 21 2008, 09:01 AM']That day isn't about your wedding dress; it's about the Sacrament of Matrimony.[/quote]
:yes: :clap:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
homeschoolmom
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604154' date='Jul 20 2008, 07:20 PM']it's the bride's special day, but I don't think that gives her the license to wear what ever she wants. I think she needs to respect tradition.[/quote]
I wouldn't even call wearing white a tradition (in the Catholic sense), but more of a custom. The "tradition" is less than 200 years old and was begun to show off having enough wealth to justify a dress worn only once. It was pretty much only followed by the elite until the 20th century. I would prefer a bride choose a modest colored dress to an immodest white one any day.

It is also only customary (not manditory) that little girls wear white at First Communion. The church does not mandate these things.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friendofJPII
[quote name='StColette' post='1604447' date='Jul 21 2008, 10:33 AM']I'll just leave it at this. On your wedding day it really isn't going to matter to you what you are wearing. I could have cared less if I were wearing burnt orange or white. I believe many women would share the same opinion. That in the end, on that day it really didn't matter.

The point is the Church doesn't demand that we wear white or any color for that matter. It does demand that it be something tasteful and modest though some priests are more lax with this than others.[/quote]


I agree that the wedding isn't soley about the dress, and that many people spend too much time planning their wedding instead of planning their marriage. However, I do not agree that the dress does not matter at all. What we wear says something about us, especially what we wear to such an important day. Edited by friendofJPII

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
let_go_let_God
You also need to look at people of other cultures. A white wedding dress is an American and European custom. For some cultures white symbolizes death. A white wedding dress is more a cultural aspect rather than a church aspect. My great grandmother was a Finnish immigrant and her wedding dress was just a simple dress that she had.

God bless-
LGLG

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StColette
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604461' date='Jul 21 2008, 11:59 AM']What we wear says something about us, especially what we wear to such an important day.[/quote]

Yes, what we wear can say something about us, but I believe this applies more toward modesty than to a particular color. If I had been wearing a blue or pink dress as my wedding dress my husband and family would still have found me beautiful and still have known that I was pure of heart because of whom I am and not because of what I was wearing.

[quote]You also need to look at people of other cultures. A white wedding dress is an American and European custom.[/quote]

Exactly, the Korean wedding gowns are very beautiful and very brightly colored.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Barbarus
[quote name='friendofJPII' post='1604461' date='Jul 21 2008, 11:59 AM']I agree that the wedding isn't soley about the dress, and that many people spend too much time planning their wedding instead of planning their marriage. However, I do not agree that the dress does not matter at all. What we wear says something about us, especially what we wear to such an important day.[/quote]
I agree that the dress communicates something, just as in a sense all clothing does. And we need to pay attention to what we are communicating. We are sacramental people, who believe that spiritual truths are revealed in and through our bodies and the physical realm.

However, this is an area in which (as several people have pointed out) the church has allowed for prudential actions. There is no ritually prescribed manner of dressing for weddings, and frankly the white symbolism for a wedding is different than the white symbolism for a baptism. We don't, for example, require grooms to wear white to symbolize their purity of heart -- this is a tradition only for the bride. The white for weddings first and foremost symbolizes sexual purity, which in previous generations was prized far more highly than it is today. Not that we shouldn't prize virginity, but the fact of the matter is that as a culture we do not. And, there is nothing wrong with a couple choosing to exemplify other virtues or spiritual truths which are equally important.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
friendofJPII
I agree that modesty is more important than color. But you can't take a look at some of the gowns on David's Bridal and not be disturbed. Perhaps "the Italian" in me clings to tradition, and the white wedding dress has been a tradition for as long as I can remember, for as long as my grandmother can remember for that matter. The emphasis on bridal wear these days is on "individuality" (i.e. on self) and it is this selfishness that is causing many marriages to fail. I guess I see the move towards colored (and in many cases, immodest dresses) as a way of our culture throwing out all bastions of tradition and instead espousing a "do whatever you want" attitude.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×