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"you Can't Run Away Forever..."


DameAgnes

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[url="http://kckvocations.com/sister-m-mercedes-diaz-fsgm"]http://kckvocations.com/sister-m-mercedes-diaz-fsgm[/url]

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That kind of reminds me of something I saw. It was a week or so after God basically hit me over the head with my vocation at a retreat (I tend to be really stubborn, and I needed it). Anyway, I was visiting my friend, and she had a quote up on her wall that said, "You are Christ's beloved, your place is at His side. Why are you running?" I was still kind of in disbelief after the retreat, and this was like another little confirmation.

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[quote name='fiat voluntas tua' post='1828207' date='Apr 7 2009, 07:23 PM']That kind of reminds me of something I saw. It was a week or so after God basically hit me over the head with my vocation at a retreat (I tend to be really stubborn, and I needed it). Anyway, I was visiting my friend, and she had a quote up on her wall that said, "You are Christ's beloved, your place is at His side. Why are you running?" I was still kind of in disbelief after the retreat, and this was like another little confirmation.[/quote]


sweet :love:

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Guest Laoiseneasa

I am stuck in what seems to be eternal discernment and a longing for something that I cant explain - please help and pray me

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[quote name='Laoiseneasa' post='1828642' date='Apr 8 2009, 05:16 AM']I am stuck in what seems to be eternal discernment and a longing for something that I cant explain - please help and pray me[/quote]

Do you have a spiritual director? Someone who could help you move beyond the plateau that you are in now and move forward with your discernment? It might be fears that are holding you back, but perhaps your practical situation is not conducive to progress in the spiritual life? It is hard to know what to say, not knowing your situation.

The first and best answer for me is always prayer :pray: -- spend time in front of the Blessed Sacrament if possible - or just alone in your room, if that is all you can do - alone with God. Tell Jesus everything you are feeling and ask Him to help you pray and discern. Pray to St Michael to protect you from all evil distractions, and if you have a favorite or patron saint, pray a Novena for your vocation. I will keep you in my prayers as well.

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i have felt from the time i was a young girl that i might have a vocation to the religious life. i love reading stories like these. thank you for sharing.

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Guest Laoiseneasa

[quote name='nunsense' post='1828900' date='Apr 8 2009, 01:45 PM']Do you have a spiritual director? Someone who could help you move beyond the plateau that you are in now and move forward with your discernment? It might be fears that are holding you back, but perhaps your practical situation is not conducive to progress in the spiritual life? It is hard to know what to say, not knowing your situation.

The first and best answer for me is always prayer :pray: -- spend time in front of the Blessed Sacrament if possible - or just alone in your room, if that is all you can do - alone with God. Tell Jesus everything you are feeling and ask Him to help you pray and discern. Pray to St Michael to protect you from all evil distractions, and if you have a favorite or patron saint, pray a Novena for your vocation. I will keep you in my prayers as well.[/quote]


thanks very much for your kind reply Nunsense - I cant explain the pull that I feel, it leaves from time to time but always comes back. thats the reason i am here in phatmass I suppose - that pull - but I lack the courage to do something about it or to let Him fully into my heart

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[quote name='Laoiseneasa' post='1835157' date='Apr 14 2009, 12:00 PM']thanks very much for your kind reply Nunsense - I cant explain the pull that I feel, it leaves from time to time but always comes back. thats the reason i am here in phatmass I suppose - that pull - but I lack the courage to do something about it or to let Him fully into my heart[/quote]


You know, this kind of happened to me. A few years ago, when I would pray about my vocation, I would pray about marriage, and think about how I wanted that. But I would always feel this "what if?" question--what if that isn't what I am called to? I never did anything about it, really, although I convinced myself I was being 'open' to the idea of religious life.

Eventually, those thoughts started to fade. I was beginning to see marriage as an actual vocation, rather than just something you did. I was seeing some really wonderful examples of relationships and marriages. And I convinced myself for a couple of years that the reason I wasn't feeling those 'what ifs' anymore was because I was called to marriage.

One day, I was talking to my spiritual director, and she asked me if I thought I would be able to respond to the call to religious life if I was called. I said I hoped so, but that I thought I was called to marriage. I went through all my reasons why I was called to marriage. And as I said them out loud, I realized how weak they were. And she told me later that I didn't sound like I believed myself.

I spent the next couple of weeks trying to justify myself and my call to marriage. One day, a priest from the order was in town and giving a talk after a holy hour. As he was talking I felt such a sense of peace. And it scared me, because I had an idea about what that peace meant, and I didn't like it. I tried looking around at all the families that were there, telling myself that was what I wanted, and I tried to avoid looking at any of the sisters for very long.

That weekend, I was going on a silent retreat. As I was waiting for my ride, I was watching those baby shows on TLC. Normally I really don't like watching them, but I was trying to tell myself that this was what I wanted. (Which it isn't like I am not attracted to marriage/family--that's normal regardless of if you are called to religious life or not.)

At the retreat, I felt so relieved. Things had been so crazy lately, and I was so restless. A lot of the retreat was focused on God's love, kind of appropriate over Valentine's Day I suppose. One of the priests talked about how if we don't understand that God is love, we will always see what he asks of us as a threat to us.

The next day, I read in a prayer booklet a quotation that said, "Anything less than everything for the crucified Lord is not enough." Immediately, I tried to tell myself that this was directed at everybody, and it didn't mean THAT everything.

Later that day, the other priest was talking about vocations, and he mentioned something that Mother Teresa said, which basically said that if you have a vocation you know it. Because it isn't something that is our normal human inclination. And maybe people here will disagree with that, but as soon as he said it, I KNEW.

And for once it didn't scare me. (I remember one day right before college when I literally went and ran around my neighborhood because I tried to run from my vocation.) But since that day, things have become so much clearer--the last five years especially.

And yes, it is somewhat scary. For a while it felt like I was at the top of a huge cliff about to jump off or something. But be courageous--as Pope John Paul II said--Do not be afraid! God wants your WHOLE heart--and He won't be satisfied until He gets it.

I'll leave you with something that Pope Benedict said at his inauguration Mass:


[quote name='Pope Benedict XVI']At this point, my mind goes back to 22 October 1978, when Pope John Paul II began his ministry here in Saint Peter’s Square. His words on that occasion constantly echo in my ears: “Do not be afraid! Open wide the doors for Christ!” The Pope was addressing the mighty, the powerful of this world, who feared that Christ might take away something of their power if they were to let him in, if they were to allow the faith to be free. Yes, he would certainly have taken something away from them: the dominion of corruption, the manipulation of law and the freedom to do as they pleased. But he would not have taken away anything that pertains to human freedom or dignity, or to the building of a just society. The Pope was also speaking to everyone, especially the young. Are we not perhaps all afraid in some way? If we let Christ enter fully into our lives, if we open ourselves totally to him, are we not afraid that He might take something away from us? Are we not perhaps afraid to give up something significant, something unique, something that makes life so beautiful? Do we not then risk ending up diminished and deprived of our freedom? And once again the Pope said: No! If we let Christ into our lives, we lose nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing of what makes life free, beautiful and great. No! Only in this friendship are the doors of life opened wide. Only in this friendship is the great potential of human existence truly revealed. Only in this friendship do we experience beauty and liberation. And so, today, with great strength and great conviction, on the basis of long personal experience of life, I say to you, dear young people: Do not be afraid of Christ! He takes nothing away, and he gives you everything. When we give ourselves to him, we receive a hundredfold in return. Yes, open, open wide the doors to Christ – and you will find true life. Amen.[/quote]

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[quote name='Laoiseneasa' post='1835157' date='Apr 14 2009, 12:00 PM']thanks very much for your kind reply Nunsense - I cant explain the pull that I feel, it leaves from time to time but always comes back. thats the reason i am here in phatmass I suppose - that pull - but I lack the courage to do something about it or to let Him fully into my heart[/quote]


You know, this kind of happened to me. A few years ago, when I would pray about my vocation, I would pray about marriage, and think about how I wanted that. But I would always feel this "what if?" question--what if that isn't what I am called to? I never did anything about it, really, although I convinced myself I was being 'open' to the idea of religious life.

Eventually, those thoughts started to fade. I was beginning to see marriage as an actual vocation, rather than just something you did. I was seeing some really wonderful examples of relationships and marriages. And I convinced myself for a couple of years that the reason I wasn't feeling those 'what ifs' anymore was because I was called to marriage.

One day, I was talking to my spiritual director, and she asked me if I thought I would be able to respond to the call to religious life if I was called. I said I hoped so, but that I thought I was called to marriage. I went through all my reasons why I was called to marriage. And as I said them out loud, I realized how weak they were. And she told me later that I didn't sound like I believed myself.

I spent the next couple of weeks trying to justify myself and my call to marriage. One day, a priest from the order was in town and giving a talk after a holy hour. As he was talking I felt such a sense of peace. And it scared me, because I had an idea about what that peace meant, and I didn't like it. I tried looking around at all the families that were there, telling myself that was what I wanted, and I tried to avoid looking at any of the sisters for very long.

That weekend, I was going on a silent retreat. As I was waiting for my ride, I was watching those baby shows on TLC. Normally I really don't like watching them, but I was trying to tell myself that this was what I wanted. (Which it isn't like I am not attracted to marriage/family--that's normal regardless of if you are called to religious life or not.)

At the retreat, I felt so relieved. Things had been so crazy lately, and I was so restless. A lot of the retreat was focused on God's love, kind of appropriate over Valentine's Day I suppose. One of the priests talked about how if we don't understand that God is love, we will always see what he asks of us as a threat to us.

The next day, I read in a prayer booklet a quotation that said, "Anything less than everything for the crucified Lord is not enough." Immediately, I tried to tell myself that this was directed at everybody, and it didn't mean THAT everything.

Later that day, the other priest was talking about vocations, and he mentioned something that Mother Teresa said, which basically said that if you have a vocation you know it. Because it isn't something that is our normal human inclination. And maybe people here will disagree with that, but as soon as he said it, I KNEW.

And for once it didn't scare me. (I remember one day right before college when I literally went and ran around my neighborhood because I tried to run from my vocation.) But since that day, things have become so much clearer--the last five years especially.

And yes, it is somewhat scary. For a while it felt like I was at the top of a huge cliff about to jump off or something. But be courageous--as Pope John Paul II said--Do not be afraid! God wants your WHOLE heart--and He won't be satisfied until He gets it.

I'll leave you with something that Pope Benedict said at his inauguration Mass:


[quote name='Pope Benedict XVI']At this point, my mind goes back to 22 October 1978, when Pope John Paul II began his ministry here in Saint Peter’s Square. His words on that occasion constantly echo in my ears: “Do not be afraid! Open wide the doors for Christ!”... The Pope was also speaking to everyone, especially the young. Are we not perhaps all afraid in some way? If we let Christ enter fully into our lives, if we open ourselves totally to him, are we not afraid that He might take something away from us? Are we not perhaps afraid to give up something significant, something unique, something that makes life so beautiful? Do we not then risk ending up diminished and deprived of our freedom? And once again the Pope said: No! If we let Christ into our lives, we lose nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing of what makes life free, beautiful and great. No! Only in this friendship are the doors of life opened wide. Only in this friendship is the great potential of human existence truly revealed. Only in this friendship do we experience beauty and liberation. And so, today, with great strength and great conviction, on the basis of long personal experience of life, I say to you, dear young people: Do not be afraid of Christ! He takes nothing away, and he gives you everything. When we give ourselves to him, we receive a hundredfold in return. Yes, open, open wide the doors to Christ – and you will find true life. Amen.[/quote]

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  • 2 weeks later...
elizabeth09

I am always reading about saint`s life and how God turn their life forever. Then God hit me on the head last year. I deserve that. That was pretty big hit, because I never thought that I had a vocation to the religious life.

<_<

I thought about my wedding and how it might be.

I feel differnt because I am going to be in religious life. Never thought about that.

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