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  1. Sponsa-Christi

    Sponsa-Christi

    Church Militant


    • Points

      11

    • Posts

      812


  2. JHFamily

    JHFamily

    Chummy Commoner


    • Points

      4

    • Posts

      252


  3. Bonkira

    Bonkira

    n00b


    • Points

      3

    • Posts

      59


  4. GraceUk

    GraceUk

    Chummy Commoner


    • Points

      2

    • Posts

      254


Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 10/12/2021 in all areas

  1. Sponsa-Christi

    Discerning without parents' support

    Ultimately, you following God's will for your life will be for your good and everyone else's--including your parents'. Also, most parents come around when they see their children happy in their vocation. (My parents at first weren't too thrilled about my discernment, but when the time came for my actual consecration they were almost embarrassingly supportive and happy for me!) That being said, as I think you already sense, this is a big shock for your parents, so you probably need to be patient and give them the emotional "space" they need to process this news. Also, provided that you're not incurring student loans that would be challenging to pay back quickly, I don't think that finishing college is a bad idea. I think it is possible to "lose" a vocation if you did something like put it on the back burner for ten years while you drifted through life aimlessly; but I don't think it's likely for someone your age with a genuine vocation to lose a vocation in the relatively short and focused time it takes to finish an undergrad degree. Nobody likes to think about it during the "falling in love" phase of discernment, but built into the formation process is the possibility that you may discern out of the community. And you need to feel perfectly free to discern out, and to only stay on until final vows because you are happy in the community and you feel it's where God is continuing to call you--and not because you feel you "have to" stay, or because you couldn't imagine what you would do with your life if you left. Having a degree to fall back on is helpful for discernment in that respect. But even if (God willing!) you do persevere in whatever community you enter, finishing a degree will give you a sense of confidence, self-discipline, and personal maturity that will be a very helpful "dowry" to bring to religious life. And, even if you do wind up entering the community you're hoping to visit, PLEASE do check out at least one or two others, even if it's just a quick weekend visit. I think it makes for a healthier discernment when you have a slightly broader first-hand impression of how religious/consecrated life is lived in the Church today.
    4 points
  2. Sponsa-Christi

    Visitations of orders with the EF?

    Again, speculation from outsiders isn't helpful...but I would wonder if "teaching" really means "have an outside apostolate like active Sisters"; or if it was more like: "nuns should be open to doing spiritual direction with laypeople who come to the monastery." Cor Orans did strongly encourage cloistered nuns to start doing more limited outreach to the faithful and world at large, through things like hosting public holy hours in their extern chapel. I know this was controversial at the time, but in my opinion this falls into the "maybe not what I would have written, but also not a crazy idea" category.
    4 points
  3. JHFamily

    Visitations of orders with the EF?

    Speculation is not helpful. The video should also be taken with a grain of salt. It, too, is speculation.
    4 points
  4. Sponsa-Christi

    Discerning without parents' support

    One more thought...it's actually rather impressive to me that non-Catholic parents are as relatively ok with the idea of discernment as yours seem to be from your description here (in terms of not being angry, proposing not unreasonable compromises, etc.) Sometimes God does call us to dramatic sacrifices and radical breaks with family and homeland; but I think just as if not more often He calls us to follow Him while being as kind and gentle as possible to those who love us and who may be on their own journey of conversation. So honestly, if I were in your shoes I would try very hard to have at least that last Christmas together--it would probably be better for your parents' own spiritual development if they could come to see your vocation as a bittersweet but beautiful journey grounded in love; as opposed to a dynamic where God asked you to suddenly forsake your own parents as though they were merely a worldly distraction.
    3 points
  5. Bonkira

    Discerning without parents' support

    It is good to keep moving forward, but it is also good to listen to the voices of those around you...often we talk about our parents being the first reflection of God's will for us, and a good way to practice obedience now. I also like to bring a bit of balance: you are interested in a community and they are interested in you visiting, and that is where you are. It's disingenuous to yourself and your discernment to add ownership to the mix...you have not yet set foot inside or even met them yet. While they may be interested in vocations, no community will be planning on you entering without at least some cursory work together and even more so for a cloistered order. And...setting your eyes on an international order as your first and only option is difficult in today's world, as immigration and visas are not cheap and most orders cannot pay for that. Your parents are not out of line asking for you to consider an order in the country you live in. As it seems you have not been interested in visiting what cloistered communities your country has, I would engage in that now as a way to communicate to your parents that you are considerate of their feelings. God leads in many mysterious ways, and many have found their homes in exactly that manner. Go for retreats and face to face meetings if possible and learn how each embraces the cloister. You may find God there, versus an order in Europe or God may lead you into an apostolic life or he may continue to place the order you are interested in at the center...but engaging is how you allow God to move within you and your life. Adding that if your eyes are currently set on the order in your icon, your discernment needs to be thorough and well fleshed out before you even visit. They are not shy about turning those away who they do not feel have a vocation to their monastery specifically, and have done it in initial visits during initial conversations without even entertaining a period of postulancy. It is a specific vocation to live as they live, and they are not an order that feels a responsibility to allow too many to try it out if they do not feel it will be fruitful.
    3 points
  6. GraceUk

    Discerning without parents' support

    I think you should make a retreat with a community nearer to home. Quite a few orders do those discernment/retreat weekends in a general way and not just aimed at people who are interested in their particular community. If you haven't even visited this community and they have no website the chances are it might not be what you are expecting. Also moving countries is a very big deal as regards visas, immigration rules and so on.
    2 points
  7. cartermia

    Was Macht Der Fuchs Sagan?

    Hi everyone! Long time, no post! I graduated from college this past August with a degree in Philosophy, discerned out of religious life early on in my college career, and have been dating a great guy for a little over three years. I am getting my Masters of Theology in Bioethics and am currently waiting to hear back about a pro-life job in West Virginia. Keep on praying for me! I'm praying for you all <3
    2 points
  8. Feankie

    Olam Comunity In Hanceville Al

    This is rather old news. Did you perhaps hear this from an online report of late? A You Tube video of a priest being interviewed? HIs information is not entirely correct nor is it reflective of "real time." The visitation was done years ago and steps were taken at that time to deal with the nun who dismissed many nuns whom she either thought had no vocation or whose views she didn't agree with. She hasn't been there for years. The nuns in Charlotte were recalled to OLAM and Mother Dolores Marie from Charlotte replaced Mother Angelica. Enough time has passed, new elections were held (last month, I believe) and there is now a new Superior. BTW, a few nuns went to their foundation in France. Perhaps you should read their blog, Image and Likeness, and see what's new. And yes, there have been several vocations in the past few years! Deo gracias Please do not post about this Order (or any others) if you do not have first-hand, current information. It spreads false information and tarnishes the reputation of the Order.
    2 points
  9. BarbaraTherese

    Visitations of orders with the EF?

    Thanks Sponsa. Thomas Merton in his book "Contemplation in a World of Action" wrote that contemplatives should reach out from their parlor and share the fruits of their contemplation. The contemplative nuns I am in touch with are doing this and have been supporting me spiritually and from their parlors for probably 35 years or so. It is really great to know it is more widespread today.
    1 point
  10. little2add

    Will you get the vaccine?

    Updated Wednesday, Oct. 13 at 3:40 p.m. to include statements from Surgeon General of the Army Lt. Gen. R. Scott Dingle. Catholic U.S. troops should be allowed to refuse the COVID-19 vaccine based solely on conscientious objection and regardless of whether abortion-related tissue was used in its creation or testing, the archbishop for the military declared in a new statement supporting service members who are seeking religious exemptions.
    1 point
  11. Mhairi

    Skin Care and Hygiene

    Most communities in the UK are pretty open to all those practical questions, which are important to ask even if they feel embarrassing to mention e.g. what menstrual supplies can you use? Most will answer: what you are using now is fine. These things need to be asked simply and answered simply! Otherwise they are liable to take up too much thinking/wondering time when discerning. One PC community simply has a cupboard where shampoo/deodorant/shower gel/toothpaste etc are available to take and use on the assumption that sisters are adults and could take what they needed when they had run out. Anything special needed permission eg for excess treatment but it was never refused, again on the grounds that sisters wouldn’t be asking if they didn’t need it and permission was asked primarily so the sister in charge of the shopping could add it to the list. Hope that helps! Sorry autocorrect sabotages me - I meant to write for excema treatment
    1 point
  12. Sister Leticia

    Religious Names

    Oh dear... Luigi, you live in or near St Louis? I'm sure you've seen Philippine's star on the Walk of Fame? I visited it when I was there in 2017. The star says St Philippine Duchesne RSCJ, though the plaque with the citation uses both Philippine and Rose Philippine. There was something quite moving about seeing her name and star - seeing a canonised saint - among writers, entertainers, athletes, war heroes etc. (Sorry, we've diverted a thread about what names people would want to be called...)
    1 point
  13. DameAgnes

    2 Sisters become nuns....

    https://aleteia.org/2021/10/11/two-sisters-become-nuns-at-the-same-time-in-spain/
    1 point
  14. debc

    Skin Care and Hygiene

    I don't think skin care is a luxury. I find myself thinking about it when sisters/nuns in very warm climates are out in the sun a lot and some older nuns have many age spots and moles. Sunscreen should be a no brainer type of thing, not a luxury. I would think too if you could use your own money from home or get gifts of it from family, it shouldn't be a big deal. The Desert Nuns from Poor Clare's in AZ have a wish list on amazon and I've seen vitamins and oral care products and wide brim hats. Poverty doesn't mean we put ourselves at risk for disease that can cost much more than 10.00. I understand it seeming not "prayerful" but it's not like you want calgon bath oil beads for soaking. ; ) I wonder at times when they show schedules for nuns, when do they shower and how do they have time in half an hour to dry hair or take care of personal things. I feel a lot of questions not about prayer and vocation are legitimate questions. I see some younger orders answer them online. Knowing how you do laundry or how often you can see a doctor or dentist if on your mind, might help you concentrate better on other things if just discussed and not a secret.
    1 point
  15. PhuturePriest

    Invalid Confession?

    If we could not confess sins when we knew that, pragmatically, we will sin again and likely commit the very same sins again, then no one could ever go to confession. I desire and wish to the core of my being that I will never sin again -- but I know that I will. God is so good that even such a low bar as this is enough. If you desired not to commit those sins again, then that is enough. One does not zap away habitual sin with grace -- it is a process of gradually overcoming those sins with grace. So rejoice! Heaven is rejoicing over you, and we are too. Always, always, always trust in God's loving mercy. As a person who has suffered from scrupulosity, here are a few guidelines that I have been given which did wonders: 1 Do not confess something unless you are absolutely certain it was a mortal sin, and not simply because you fear it was a mortal sin. In essence: when in doubt, do not confess it. 2 Do not re-confess sins even if you are afraid that some detail you left out before changes the whole nature of the sin (I promise you that it doesn't). 3 Trust, meditate upon, and hold onto the safe and secure knowledge that God is a loving Father. He is not a psychotic judge constantly trying to beaver dam you over a technicality. Often scrupulosity is rooted in OCD coupled with a false image of God. He loves you infinitely, bends his back over to save you in every possible way, and even died for you. Does that seem like the kind of God who is out to get you on a technicality? I went to counseling with a very good lay Catholic and then a great priest for several years over scrupulosity. I struggled greatly with this fear: what if, when I am worried I committed a mortal sin and, in the desire to overcome scrupulosity I do not confess it, but it turns out that I am objectively wrong? The answer blew my mind: even then I would not be damned, because God knows that my intentions were to overcome scrupulosity and that I do not have perfect knowledge or understanding (especially because scrupulosity obscures our understanding). So even if you get something wrong on accident when determining you do not need to confess something, you can still lovingly trust in God's mercy and desire for your salvation. Again, God will not send you to eternal damnation on a technicality. This is a page I have used many times when preparing for confession, and I strongly encourage you to use it. It has saved me from a lot of pain and heartache. https://www.fisheaters.com/scruples.html
    1 point
  16. Dymphna

    Skin Care and Hygiene

    Sounds like a good idea. And as you may notice from the change of tone in this thread once you mentioned your eczema: You should tell them that you need this for health reasons. If a vocation director thinks you may have an obsession with your looks they may well raise an eyebrow and ask you about that. But to care for you body in order to keep it healthy is a different subject and likely to be less controversial.
    1 point
  17. Nunsuch

    Skin Care and Hygiene

    The use of expensive products might well be seen as a violation of poverty. As for family paying for them, most gifts are also turned over to the community, and so being singled out with such gifts will likely also be a no-no. Finally, depending on the community, the desire to have a distinctive regimen like this might be seen as a challenge to humility, and even a violation of obedience or chastity. I would ask if you were willing to give up such things. Religious life involves sacrifice and, to some extent, "death to self." If you are not, that may be an indication that this is not your path. On the other hand, many communities (though not usually enclosed ones) provide members with personal allowances. If you were to spend such funds on personal care items, that would probably be okay. However, these funds usually don't start until after profession.
    1 point
  18. Luigi

    Religious Names

    I had the very great honor of knowing Sr. Mary O'Callaghan, rscj. She told me that the archives have about 250 documents relating to Mother Duchesne - letters to her, letters she wrote, and so forth. Of those 250 documents, only 2 include the name Rose Philippine, and both of those were deeds; it seems that the legal system required her to use her full legal name. Otherwise, ALL references are to Philippine. My parish is now named after her, and the assigned name is St. Rose Philippine Duchesne. It makes me crazy! Even worse is that most of the younger parishioners refer to the parish as RPD - that's all that fits on the sports jerseys. ARRGGGHHHH!!!!!
    0 points
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