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Help with possible Spiritual Director?


PaxCordisJesu

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On 10/21/2020 at 1:45 AM, Sponsa-Christi said:

@PaxCordisJesu

Even when you are a legal adult a year from now, your entering religious life won't just affect you, it will also affect the ones you love. To a certain extent, it will be a sacrifice for your parents, too. Doing whatever you reasonably can to put their minds more at ease is an act of humility, filial reverence, and charity. 

 

Dozens of saints have found holiness by delaying their admission to religious life. For one saint who run away from their family, there's always another who submitted to their parents, brothers... wish. "Honor your father and your mother..." While it is good to be wary of emotional abuse, narcissism, in family relationship, I fear that sometimes in our society, we forgot about filial reverence, as you said Sponsa Christi (this isn't directed at you, PaxCordiJesus !).

When I was 20 years old, I was quite irritated at my parents because I felt they were trying to control me on something. When, years later, after discernment (again, blind obedience is never good, and abuse obviously exist in any family), I submitted to them, I realized that they weren't controling me... but I wasn't as mature as I thought I was.

2217 As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him when it is for his good or that of the family. "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord." Children should also obey the reasonable directions of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.

As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
from the cathechism

Do you think it would be morally wrong (i.e evil) to obey this order ? This is a question you need to ask yourself, I don't think the answer is obvious and you're the own who will know...

Your family has suffered from (witnessing ?) some kind of abuse from a priest, from what I understand. The thing is, their fear will not disappear because you turn 18... Abuse from priest (or teachers, etc...) can happen to anyone at any age. So what your family needs is healing and trust, so they can trust the church again, so they can trust your own ability to discernment in general, to protect yourself also. That's not easy.

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