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Transgender Man Here! Ask Me Anything! :)


CuriositasEtFidem

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MiscarriageSucks

The OP has told you repeatedly that his pronouns are he/him. 

It is disrespectful and unkind to refuse to listen to him. You're all so mean. Shame on you. You make me ashamed to be catholic. 

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59 minutes ago, MiscarriageSucks said:

The OP has told you repeatedly that his pronouns are he/him. 

It is disrespectful and unkind to refuse to listen to him. You're all so mean. Shame on you. You make me ashamed to be catholic. 

Is this a joke?

OK in that case then my preferred pronoun is "Allah, Great is his majesty." I demand that everyone on this site refer to me by this pronoun. And you should all be ashamed of yourself if you refuse.

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MiscarriageSucks
11 minutes ago, Peace said:

Is this a joke?

OK in that case then my preferred pronoun is "Allah, Great is his majesty." I demand that everyone on this site refer to me by this pronoun. And you should all be ashamed of yourself if you refuse.

That isn't a pronoun. Stop pretending to be dense. Or are you really that dumb?

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1 hour ago, MiscarriageSucks said:

That isn't a pronoun. Stop pretending to be dense. Or are you really that dumb?

It is a pronoun because I called it a pronoun. Just like how "she" is a man because she calls herself a man. Stop being dumb.

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6 hours ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

I agree with @PhuturePriest about showing love. If you're (Not any of you, personally) at the sidelines of a pride parade waving signs and shouting about how people are bad and unholy and living in sin, why on earth would they leave the parade to come and join you?

Your understanding of “love”, quite obviously, means “people react to me as I want them to react”. Your issue is hugely about control. A control of your body, control of others via passive aggression, triangulation and so on.

Now, I showed here quite a lot of true love i.e., as St Augustine says “true love seeks the ultimate good of the other”, not so much addressing you but people with similar problems who might read this thread. I stated here earlier that gender dysphoria always comes together with the host of other psychological problems (like anorexia/bulimia/personality disorder, most often borderline/autism spectrum etc) hence a transgender person absolutely has to work with a good clinical psychologist whose field is personality disorders for a long period of a time before taking hormones/mutilating herself. If a transgender person is a Christian, she must find a compassionate confessor/spiritual father and work with him.

Recently I posted here an example of such good compassionate approach, a talk about the pastoral care for homosexuals and transgender persons by an Eastern Orthodox priest/psychiatrist/renown specialist in the gender issues/ /married man with children and grandchildren. The approach a of the Orthodox priest to that problem was “truth and love” (love is cheap without truth) i.e. he does not give up even an inch of the Church teaching but has much compassion for a person.

Noteworthy, he refuses to answer how to work "with a transgender people in general", as he said, all people are different and in any case the work is between a confessor and a person. It is never public. I think here is the wisdom of the Eastern Orthodoxy: those who want help come to a confessor and then work with him quietly like this: 

6 hours ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Most of us (except the radicals) just want to live quietly as ourselves

. It is no one’s business what a transgender person does as herself, it is his own struggle with a support of his confessor, psychologists and a close circle, just like someone’s sexual life is not a public business, not something to wave around because such waving does much harm to a person herself and even to others.

In the very beginning of this thread I stated that there is only one legitimate reason for a person with gender dysphoria to write on the Catholic or Orthodox forum stating that she is a transgender with her first post: to ask for a help (to find a good priest/psychologist, people with similar problems, theological help etc).

Other, illegitimate reasons are either to provoke people into useless discussion and quarrels, especially during the Lent or a plain exhibitionism or/and insatiable attention/validation-seeking.

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4 hours ago, MiscarriageSucks said:

The OP has told you repeatedly that his pronouns are he/him. 

It is disrespectful and unkind to refuse to listen to him. You're all so mean. Shame on you. You make me ashamed to be catholic. 

why? If you don't believe it is reflective of reality to call someone X, you suggest merely pandering to someone as to not hurt their feelings?

That's weak sauce. I feel bad for people who have these issues. Does that mean I should lie to them? Or participate in what I believe to be a delusion? To what end? I guess I do in real life because a) I'm a coward and b) the legal and social repercussions  are steep.

And if you're sick of holier-than-thou folks, you might want to take a look in the mirror, sheesh.

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MiscarriageSucks
9 minutes ago, Ice_nine said:

why? If you don't believe it is reflective of reality to call someone X, you suggest merely pandering to someone as to not hurt their feelings?

That's weak sauce. I feel bad for people who have these issues. Does that mean I should lie to them? Or participate in what I believe to be a delusion? To what end? I guess I do in real life because a) I'm a coward and b) the legal and social repercussions  are steep.

And if you're sick of holier-than-thou folks, you might want to take a look in the mirror, sheesh.

It isn't hard to treat a trans person with respect. Why do all of you arse portals seem utterly incapable of it? 

I was on phatmass ten years ago and it was full of kind and respectful people. Now it's all conservative jerks with no sense of generosity toward someone different than them. 

I regret coming back here. Y'all smell of elderberries.

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12 minutes ago, MiscarriageSucks said:

It isn't hard to treat a trans person with respect. Why do all of you arse portals seem utterly incapable of it? 

I was on phatmass ten years ago and it was full of kind and respectful people. Now it's all conservative jerks with no sense of generosity toward someone different than them. 

I regret coming back here. Y'all smell of elderberries.

Yeah you refuse to refer to me by my new pronoun "Allah, Great is his majesty."  That makes you an "arse portal".

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CuriositasEtFidem
1 hour ago, Anastasia said:

Your understanding of “love”, quite obviously, means “people react to me as I want them to react”. Your issue is hugely about control. A control of your body, control of others via passive aggression, triangulation and so on.

Now, I showed here quite a lot of true love i.e., as St Augustine says “true love seeks the ultimate good of the other”, not so much addressing you but people with similar problems who might read this thread. I stated here earlier that gender dysphoria always comes together with the host of other psychological problems (like anorexia/bulimia/personality disorder, most often borderline/autism spectrum etc) hence a transgender person absolutely has to work with a good clinical psychologist whose field is personality disorders for a long period of a time before taking hormones/mutilating herself. If a transgender person is a Christian, she must find a compassionate confessor/spiritual father and work with him.

Recently I posted here an example of such good compassionate approach, a talk about the pastoral care for homosexuals and transgender persons by an Eastern Orthodox priest/psychiatrist/renown specialist in the gender issues/ /married man with children and grandchildren. The approach a of the Orthodox priest to that problem was “truth and love” (love is cheap without truth) i.e. he does not give up even an inch of the Church teaching but has much compassion for a person.

Noteworthy, he refuses to answer how to work "with a transgender people in general", as he said, all people are different and in any case the work is between a confessor and a person. It is never public. I think here is the wisdom of the Eastern Orthodoxy: those who want help come to a confessor and then work with him quietly like this: 

. It is no one’s business what a transgender person does as herself, it is his own struggle with a support of his confessor, psychologists and a close circle, just like someone’s sexual life is not a public business, not something to wave around because such waving does much harm to a person herself and even to others.

In the very beginning of this thread I stated that there is only one legitimate reason for a person with gender dysphoria to write on the Catholic or Orthodox forum stating that she is a transgender with her first post: to ask for a help (to find a good priest/psychologist, people with similar problems, theological help etc).

Other, illegitimate reasons are either to provoke people into useless discussion and quarrels, especially during the Lent or a plain exhibitionism or/and insatiable attention/validation-seeking.

I do appreciate your contributing that stuff, that is love, which St. Thomas defines as "willing the true good for another" if I remember correctly. And the only reason I posted here was out of idle boredom and the thought that since a lot of Catholics aren't well-educated on trans stuff from an actual trans person, I might be able to help a bit. I don't care one bit if you think I'm ~valid~ or not. I am. I had no idea this thread was going to go so sour. If I did, I never would have opened myself up to this terrible, terrible experience. 

When I talk about not being treated with charity, I mean stuff like being called a tr*nny, ars*hole, "special snowflake," or otherwise being disrespectful to me (not that you specifically did any of that).

Well now, I think this thread has truly earned the title "dumpster fire." We're all a little frustrated, so how about another jam break? This one's old but gold

 

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3 minutes ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

I do appreciate your contributing that stuff, that is love, which St. Thomas defines as "willing the true good for another" if I remember correctly. And the only reason I posted here was out of idle boredom and the thought that since a lot of Catholics aren't well-educated on trans stuff from an actual trans person, I might be able to help a bit. I don't care one bit if you think I'm ~valid~ or not. I am. I had no idea this thread was going to go so sour. If I did, I never would have opened myself up to this terrible, terrible experience. 

When I talk about not being treated with charity, I mean stuff like being called a tr*nny, ars*hole, "special snowflake," or otherwise being disrespectful to me (not that you specifically did any of that).

A few of my posts towards you were overly vindictive. I was wrong about that. I apologize.

I don't have any particular issue with calling a transgender person by his preferred pronoun if asked to do so (unless the Church comes forward and clearly teaches that I am forbidden to do that). But I do take issue with the idea that I should be forced to refer a transgender person by his preferred pronoun, or that I am an evil person if I choose not to because I feel that doing so would be inconsistent with my faith.

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CuriositasEtFidem
Just now, Peace said:

A few of my posts towards you were overly vindictive. I was wrong about that. I apologize.

I don't have any particular issue with calling a transgender person by his preferred pronoun if asked to do so (unless the Church comes forward and clearly teaches that I am forbidden to do that). But I do take issue with the idea that I should be forced to refer a transgender person by his preferred pronoun, or that I am an evil person if I choose not to because I feel that doing so would be inconsistent with my faith.

Sure, it's all good, no worries. I'm not forcing you to call me he/him, if it seemed like that, I apologize as well. For the sake of compromise, if you don't want to use my pronouns, using no pronouns at all works too. Like I said earlier, just OP or Curiositas is fine. I don't get referred to as a female, you don't have to refer to me as a male; everyone wins 

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fides' Jack
12 hours ago, CuriositasEtFidem said:

Hey just a quick aside, I had a little idea. In this thread, both for the sake of my dysphoria and all of your preferences, how about we use no pronouns at all for me? Just OP or Curiositas is fine.

Sorry, no can do.  You've made it known you're biologically female.  Therefore I will call you she and her.

As many here know, I'm sure, when you destroy language, you destroy civilization.

"She" and "Her" specifically refer to biological sex.  It has nothing to do with how you feel inside.

10 hours ago, MiscarriageSucks said:

The OP has told you repeatedly that his pronouns are he/him. 

It is disrespectful and unkind to refuse to listen to him. You're all so mean. Shame on you. You make me ashamed to be catholic. 

You make me ashamed to be Catholic.  You're extremely mean - willing to sacrifice a person's soul so that she might feel a little "nicer" for a bit.  That's not charity, that's hatred of God and hatred of truth.

On 2/26/2021 at 8:04 PM, Peace said:

Perhaps Jesus was not "nice" but I think he was understanding and compassionate.

Often yes, often no.  From the Gospels there were a number of times He rebuked the apostles or other disciples.  He called people names.  He called them out.  

He was also often very compassionate, to those who had faith or were looking for it, or to those who wished to repent or to change their lives.  To those who argued against truth, it was always a rebuke.

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