Redemptoristines and older vocations

[Nunsuch]

The important thing is not whether I agree (and many of the sisters I know are of course older than 74), but whether the community does. One does not have a particular vocation at ANY age unless it is affirmed. Age is only one factor. If a community gives a definitive “no,” you do not have a vocation there, disappointing as it may be. 

[Dymphna]

7 hours ago, Nunsuch said:

 If a community gives a definitive “no,” you do not have a vocation there, disappointing as it may be. 

This is a statement I find difficult. Because communities are not infallible. And because I believe (somewhat OT here) that the church currently fails to recognize many vocations of women and married men to the priesthood.

What makes me so uncomfortable with this statement is that it gives someone else (the community) the power do decide about something that belongs very much into the personal space of a persons relationship with God. Only God and a person herself can know what their vocation is. It may be that it is not possible to live that vocation, and that is not uncommon - just think about the many people who remain single or childless despite their vocation to marriage and/or parenthood. It's hard to not be able to live ones vocation, but it's not like God would not allow such a bad thing to happen. God allows lots of much worse things to happen.

[Nunsuch]

Perhaps you misunderstand me. My point was that the applicant doesn’t have a call to THAT community f the “no” is definitive. (I as very careful in how I worded this.) They may elsewhere.

The only alternative interpretation would be that someone could be admitted contrary to the community’s will. And the implications of that are disastrous for all concerned. 

[Dymphna]

5 hours ago, Nunsuch said:

The only alternative interpretation would be that someone could be admitted contrary to the community’s will.

That is clearly not an option. But we may be concerned with different things here: You think about admission rights, I think about the psychological fallout for the person who received the "no". In my own experience, it was not helpful to try to convince myself that the community had made the right decision in rejecting me and that I should grow to see the will of God in this. But it did help to trust in my relationship with God and accept that communities can make mistakes, just like many other institutions and people in responsible positions.

[Nunsuch]

Yes, communities can make mistakes--and so can we. 

When I was applying for jobs, I was in a field where there were routinely 200+ applicants for single openings. Naturally, I was rejected--a lot. Was I sure that I was qualified? Many times. Did rejections hurt? Absolutely. Did I move on (and eventually get a job with more than 300 applicants)? Yes. 

I think rejection is a part of life. So is moving on, even when one is hurt. I hope you find where you are supposed to be, and the affirmation that that is the case.

And I won't be saying more in this matter. I wish you well.

 

[Dymphna]

Thank you, nunsuch! And - currently things are going very well for me :-)