I haven't read right through this thread.  Apologies.    If truth is going to hurt a person, no matter how charitable, should I still convey the truth?  How would I like to be treated, perhaps need to be treated, were I to identify as the opposite gender?  Truth can be hurtful because the person is not ready for it, or because there is something in their history/where  they are coming from, where any sort of rejection can devastate.  And we cannot fool ourselves, telling the truth with char