I Made It 3 Weeks

[Lilllabettt]

Sometime after falling asleep I awoke to a loud clanging and banging sound. I realized someone was trying to get in the house the school rents for the staff where I am in Cambodia. Right now it is just me and the principal who live here. It was so violent I thought it must be like a home invader. I was told eventually someone would break into the house, its just something that happens here, so I thought maybe this was it. The shaking and banging continued for a few seconds and then I heard my name: “Lilllabettt, you ******* ***** open this ******* door” etc. Then I knew it was my principal of the school I was helping set up.  I had not locked the gate - when I went to bed it was open and he was standing outside of it. I’m not sure how he locked it that he couldn’t open it. He continued shaking the door, screaming verbal abuse using my name  and I heard a crunching sound, like glass breaking.

 

I grabbed my phone, locked my bedroom door and hid in the bathroom. I realized I did not know the number for 911/police in Cambodia so I called a coworker. While I was talking to her I heard him come inside the house. He was very angry, yelling that I was “worthless” because I did not open the gate for him. He was making very loud noises downstairs either hitting things or banging into them. I realized he was looking for me, he said “Liiiiiiiilllabettt where are you” in a menacing horror movie type of voice, “where is she” etc. I heard him at my bedroom door, he pounded on it and shook it and I heard him twisting the knob. A few moments later I heard the door frame shatter. He looked at my empty bedroom and said “she isn’t even here.” He said “she must have gone out” and then “where is she.”  He said that he was covered in blood. I thought this might be from the way he got into the house. He left my room and started searching for me in the rest of the house, calling my name with obscenities and verbal abuse attached, telling me if I did not “come out” I was “through” I was “done” and he would not let me “work for [him] anymore.”  I realized that I was trapped, because even if I made it down the stairs, I was not sure if the doors were padlocked, and if they were I would never be able to open them in time before he got me.

 

At this point my phone was ringing with return texts/phone calls from the people I was calling in the bathroom, and I think he heard it. I forgot to put it on silent. I think he heard it because he came back in my room. He stood in front of the door and he tried the knob and felt that it was locked. I heard him sink down … I think he was looking underneath the crack in the bottom of the door. I don’t know how he saw, because I was in the dark, I’d turned the lights out so he’d think  I wasn’t there. I think he must have had the light on in my bedroom because he saw I was there. He told me to open up, started turning the knob and pushing on the door. I didn’t speak to him, I held my breath the whole time and put all the strength I could holding the door  I thought if I stayed silent there was a chance he would go away again. He told me he was going to break down the door.. He said he was not dangerous and I could open the door. He just wanted me to take pictures of injuries he got from getting beaten and robbed while out drinking. I said nothing, I held the door knob so it couldn’t be turned. Then I heard honking outside, it was a couple male coworkers from the relief agency I work for. They took him away and took his keys and put him in another house across the city.

 

Anyway. They are hesitating to fire him so I told them I quit. there will be no consequences for him since the police wont do anything unless you bribe them. But I have standards ok. This job is now beneath me.

Feeling sort of miserable and disappointed to be leaving. my adventure is already over :( disappointed in myself for not finding a way to stay. I've only been here like 4 weeks. But happy I guess that I survived 3rd world horror house 2014.

Edited October 23, 2014 by Lilllabettt

[Lil Red]

Oh Lilllabettt…I am truly sorry for you. Not only that this happened to you - how horribly frightening - but that because of it, you weren't able to seek any restitution and your adventure has been cut short. I can only imagine how disappointed you must be. :( Lots of prayers going out to you. 

[Credo in Deum]

Wow, I am happy to hear you are now safe.  Something needs to be done about that man before he hurts someone else. 

[Cherie]

Wow! I am so sorry, Lilllabettt. My heart was pounding reading that. I am SO glad you are safe, but I'm sorry nothing is being done, and that you have to leave. I think leaving is a good idea considering these terrible circumstances! But I can imagine how disappointing it must be. Hugs! And prayers!

[beatitude]

That's awful. I suggest that you write a detailed account of what happened for people higher up in the organisation. He does not sound a safe person to have in a position of responsibility around kids.

 

I have worked in the humanitarian sector overseas and with smaller NGOs in particular there is a risk that they become like little sultanates, with a few people in power who are never challenged and who are free to do whatever they like. If this is what is happening within your organisation, there is little you can do dislodge the guy from his position, but you can at least make sure what happened is logged. If staff are reluctant to do anything, you could suggest that you might have to mention it to their funders...

[Ice_nine]

Yikes. I would have thrown up that's for sure. THat sucks about leaving early, but sounds like a cluster of a situation.

[puellapaschalis]

Good grief, Lilllabettt, I'm so happy to hear you weren't physically harmed by that. Please get away from there and get back home safe.

[SilentJoy]

How frightening! While reading, I had the feeling that you're still living through it. It's done but not over. I was in a car accident once - it wasn't my fault, and no one was hurt, but I kept re-living it and wouldn't drive anywhere for days...it was scary long after everything was okay again. I hope that you're okay. Please don't beat yourself up about this. It isn't your failure, it's theirs.

[Spem in alium]

Oh my goodness! That would have been terrifying. So glad to hear you are safe, and sorry to hear you had to leave early. I hope something can be done to stop this from happening again. You'll be in my prayers.

[PhuturePriest]

I'm really sorry your trip has been cut short. I know you were really nervous about going, but it must suck that it had to be dramatically shortened, and under such circumstances.

 

That being said, that guy was a psycho and I'm glad you're going to be very far away from him. I wish someone else had been there, but I'm just glad everything turned out okay. You know where to find me if you need to talk about it.

[Amppax]

Wow, what a psycho. Sorry you had to go through that, and that your work was cut short. 

[Archaeology cat]

I'll echo everyone else. Glad you're ok! 

[CatherineM]

Glad you're okay. Missionary work is full of idealists who want to do good work and people who have burned their bridges everywhere else. You wouldn't believe how many people get assaulted in the Peace Corps.

This is going to sound bizarre, but play Tetris. Research has shown that playing Tetris after a trauma helps prevent PTSD from setting in.

[AnneLine]

wow, Lilllabettt!!!!  praying for you and I second what the others have said.  Don't feel like a failure at all.  Get out and we're glad you will be out of there!  :hug:

[Benedictus]

That guy sounds like a psycho. Getting out is probably the best thing. Always carry a rosary. An old religious sister told my sister and us when we were kids to use it to pray. But she said it's also a self defence tool. If you are attacked and can't geta way, and if you are in serious physical or sexual danger, you wrap that rosary around your hand and hit them in the face or whip them with it. Yes, she was a bit eccentric. But hey, you never know!