This Liberal Nun

[CatherineM]

As some of you know, I have serious issues with the pastoral assistant at our church. Her ideas about RCIA frankly scare me. I stayed primarily because I'm the only qualified catechist. She is actually going to use a neophyte as a catechist this year. We only have one person enrolled, and his work schedule meant the class was going to start late, and go late, and I have early classes the next day. I decided that it would just be too much for me. I have had a serious head injury, and getting a certain amount of rest is critical, otherwise I can actually get lost coming home.

I expected her to react with compassion for my health, or with good wishes for my semester studies. Instead she responded with crazy anger. She actually said I couldn't quit because I'd gotten my scholarship based on being a catechist, and if I quit I would be defrauding the college. I'm going to talk to the Dean of Students tomorrow, and if that was the sole basis of my scholarship, I'm going to repay the $800. It's not as if that was paying for my entire graduate tuition. I actually care little for money, in almost a very strange way. When people find out that I'm not even taking the profits from my book, they are very surprised.

Now I'm wondering if I'm going to have to find another church. I don't know how to react to something that makes no sense to me.

[littleflower+JMJ]

Prayers!

[Balthazor]

CatherineM I think you need a hug.

I hope things get better for you.
I hate to say this but lately I have just been blocking things out and enduring when this situation happens to me. There is not much else you can do.

[CatherineM]

I think what surprised me the most is that as basically our parish's DRE, she should be supportive of someone furthering their religious education. How angry a person do you have to be to threaten a person's scholarship? I'm disabled and poor, so most of my education is being paid for by the Province, this bursary was mostly going towards books and additional research texts I might want to pick up during the year. So, it really isn't about the money, it is about the attitude. There was something so very un-Christian about it.

My husband and I talked a long time about it last night, and we're going to start attending another church. This is a small poor inner-city church, and it needs a lot of help. Someone with my credentials comes in, and they immediately want me to take over a million things. I don't want to be a big fish in a little pond. I have a seriously arrogant inner child always trying to escape, that thrives in an atmosphere where I'm the best qualified person for every ministry. If we go to a larger church, that's not the case. I can just pick one ministry that interests me the most, and not have the compulsion to take over everything. I think that being a pew warmer in a more orthodox parish will be very good for me. Going to chapel at school has just reminded me of how the mass should look.

[Balthazor]

You Know Catherine, that might be a good idea to take a break and warm the bench. You need to have an idea of what ou can and cannot deal with and sometimes even the strongest of us need to take a rest.
I already know a few burned out priests and parish employed laity.

What is hard is that since you are so close to the parish that it really in some ways gets in the way of clear-cut business. And you end up being expected to give and give and give.
One way to combat this happening is to write out a clear and detailed description of you job and duties and have the employer and yourself sign it.
Cold? Yes. But effective you need to have a point where you draw the line.

I really get irritated when someone deems my time and effort worth so little that I am expected to be ready at the drop of a hat and be at thier beck and call. It appears that this is happening to you too.

My heart and prayers go out to you,
Balthy

[prose]

There are a LOT of good, orthodox churches in Edmonton that I am sure would be more than grateful for your help

[MissyP89]

Prayers, Catherine. Go where you will be comfortable and supported.

[CatherineM]

You want to know the funniest part of all this. Back in Oklahoma, I was the one called in to mediate when stuff like this happened in churches.

I'm relieved in a way. I wanted to focus on my graduate studies, and now I get my wish. If I get bored, I'll just write another book. Maybe a murder mystery set in church. Oh right, that's been done a few times.

[BG45]

[quote name='CatherineM' post='1658702' date='Sep 18 2008, 10:19 PM']You want to know the funniest part of all this. Back in Oklahoma, I was the one called in to mediate when stuff like this happened in churches.

I'm relieved in a way. I wanted to focus on my graduate studies, and now I get my wish. If I get bored, I'll just write another book. Maybe a murder mystery set in church. Oh right, that's been done a few times.[/quote]

You're Father Greeley now? Kidding kidding, wrong gender, more orthodox writing probably, and I imagine that you wouldn't have the ghosts of loved ones popping in with vital clues as your sleuthing Bishop apparently knows everyone in the world and finds being elevated to Archbishop a bother.

[CatherineM]

[quote name='BG45' post='1658765' date='Sep 18 2008, 09:35 PM']You're Father Greeley now? Kidding kidding, wrong gender, more orthodox writing probably, and I imagine that you wouldn't have the ghosts of loved ones popping in with vital clues as your sleuthing Bishop apparently knows everyone in the world and finds being elevated to Archbishop a bother. [/quote]

I'll bet Father Greeley actually wanted/expected people to read his stuff. I, honest to God, truthfully, didn't think anyone would read my book. I guess I thought they'd buy it and stick it on the shelf, and not read it. If I'd known people were actually going to read it, I would have left some personal stuff out. Okay, maybe I didn't think it out good.

[Saint Therese]

Maybe you should thumb wrestle her?

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='CatherineM' post='1658804' date='Sep 18 2008, 10:43 PM']I'll bet Father Greeley actually wanted/expected people to read his stuff. I, honest to God, truthfully, didn't think anyone would read my book. I guess I thought they'd buy it and stick it on the shelf, and not read it. If I'd known people were actually going to read it, I would have left some personal stuff out. Okay, maybe I didn't think it out good.[/quote]
YOU HAVE A BOOK??? How can I find this???????

[CatherineM]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' post='1658849' date='Sep 18 2008, 11:42 PM']YOU HAVE A BOOK??? How can I find this???????[/quote]

Yeah, sold close to 4000 now, and it's getting ready to go to a second print run. I find it hard to assimilate, especially since it isn't really being marketed outside of book signings/speeches. Since it is primarily about my fight against the head of a white supremacist group, everyone is afraid that if it were to be distributed through mainstream outlets, that I'd become a target again. I'm not afraid, but my husband is.

If you want one, you can PM me your address, and I'll have the publisher send one to you with an invoice. I'll even sign it. It lists for $35, but friends and family that I submit can get it for $25 postage paid. All the proceeds are going to a fund. The only royalty I've accepted is a new yo-yo.

The weirdest thing is that if I'd known this many people were actually going to read it, I'd have left some of the more personal stuff out of it. I've got people coming up to me on the bus, especially teenage girls, wanting to see the scars on my knuckles from cutting them on the guy's teeth. I never thought of it being female empowering since he walked away from the fight, and I didn't.

[Brother Adam]

I've already passed it on. It's hot stuff here and I am asking our book club to consider it for their book of the month sometime.

[Lil Red]

+J.M.J.+
Catherine, all i can say is that i feel your pain.