Stress In Religious Life?

[Gabriela]

Some of the other threads have brought up this topic a lot lately. How much stress is there in religious life? I thought that if you're a contemplative, the life should be relatively stress-free. Active sisters... well, they can live very hectic lives from what I've seen. But in a monastery...?

[Lilllabettt]

Obviously the grace is given to those who are called. But for me a purely cloistered life would be more stressful than an apostolic one. In the cloister there is nothing to distract one from the source of stress - whether that be struggles in the spiritual life or in interpersonal relationships ...  in apostolic life there is the idea that well, if I am feeling dryness in prayer, let me persevere in prayer but also go feed the poor and feel useful that way. And see the practical fruit of my service before my very eyes. Or ...  if Sister X makes me miserable - I am called to love her in this moment, but I know eventually she or I will probably be missioned somewhere else  ...

 

Life in the cloister does not permit this kind of psychological coping ... rather it forces a continuous, head on confrontation with things.

[Luigi]

I think, additionally, that it depends on your stress threshold. If one enters a monastery thinking that life will progress smoothly, in an orderly daily flow of prayer-work-recreation, then s/he may be more easily stressed when the routine has to be interrupted, even for legitimate reasons (sickness, new folks join & have to get acclimated, special ceremonies or visitors). 

[cmaD2006]

Well and I would also consider that the biggest stress factor would be relational.  Remember -- you're not just dealing with "a spouse and kids", you are dealing with a whole group of women living together 24/7 (especially in clostered communities).  With different personalities.  With their quirks and warts.

 

The one factor that unites each is the decision to live religious life within a particular charism ideally centered around Christ.

 

And yes -- there will probably be that one (or two or three) sister(s) that you "can't stand" but must learn to love.  That's a bit different than marriage (most won't choose a person as a spouse that you completely hate/can't stand). 

[AccountDeleted]

I don't have time to write a longer reply right now - but the short answer is Yes, there is a lot of stress in religious life, and for the reasons stated in the above posts. On a spiritual level, we have to also remember that religious are on the front line of the battle between good and evil, and that means that satan is always seeking ways to disturb the peace of God's servants. Constant vigilance is required, and as the scripture quote for Compline says, 'Be vigilant because your enemy the devil, is walking around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.' 1 Peter 5:8  God protects his servants but after all, someone who enters religious life has agreed to 'take up your Cross and follow me' so a certain amount of hardship is to be expected.

 

Remember also though, that there is a great joy in following Jesus, and that our suffering here on this earth is as nothing as compared to the joys that await us in heaven. :)

 

 

 

[maximillion]

I echo other posters and nunsense.......

 

I always LOVED that compline passage, it never became dull or inappropriate - and never has!

 

To imagine that life in the cloister is somehow stress free is IMO a little naive. Even without outside concerns (outside oneself) there are constant confrontations with the petty concerns of my little ego.....which constantly tries to be a bigger ego, to have what I want, to go where I please, to speak/act/pray/be according to how I feel........

 

In the silent hours of meditation when ones mind chatter will not cease,

In those moments when there is nothing, but nothing, of consolation in prayer, when I am not even sure anymore what prayer is, when all that holds me up and keeps me there on my knees before him is Faith.

 

Oh yes, there is stress!

 

And the beauteous wonder of His love that holds true in face of all of this.

[BarbTherese]

And the beauteous wonder of His love that holds true in face of all of this.

 

:like3:

[FutureSister2009]

Religious Life cannot be as stressful as college. It's impossible

[beatitude]

I think we should also remember the 'grass is greener' syndrome. ;) A stressed-out apostolic sister might wistfully think that if only she had hours to devote to prayer as contemplatives have, she wouldn't feel so stressed. A stressed-out contemplative nun might think that if only she could just get out of the cloister for a day or two and mingle with a greater variety of people, she wouldn't feel so stressed. A married woman might look at a single woman and think about all the peace that that woman must be enjoying, with no hectic family life to keep her rushed off her feet from morning to night. The stressed-out single woman might look at the married woman and think that if only she had a partner to support her and hug her as she was falling asleep after a hard day, she couldn't be this stressed.

 

Challenges come to us wherever we are, but we can find peace in the midst of them through love for God and neighbour. This doesn't mean that we will be floating along in a tranquil haze, though. :P "My peace is not the peace that the world gives."

[Sister Marie]

Religious Life cannot be as stressful as college. It's impossible

Having been in college and being a sister I can promise you that religious life is the more rigorous of the two. Now that I am doing both at the same time in addition to a full-time apostolate... It is definitely a balancing act done with a lot of love and care.

[Gabriela]

I guess what surprises me is that people find cloistered contemplative life so stressful. I understand all of the above posts, but if having a harried schedule in which it is actually impossible to get everything done that you need to do is your main stressor—and frustrations in relationships and dryness in prayer are manageable for you so long as your schedule is consistent and predictable—would you say that cloistered life is less stressful?

 

I mean, different people are stressed by different things, and different things relieve stress for different people.

 

No?

[freedomreigns]

A lot of silence means that you are faced with yourself, God and your community members in a more intense way.  We in our society are very used to having a lot of distractions....It is just not an easy life...

 

[maximillion]

I don't think stress in the cloister is any more or any less than that of any lifestyle ( see post 9 above), the stresses are different in each case, and each of us responds to them differently. For example, I was hardly ever bothered by the foibles of my sisters, but the unrelenting sameness of our routine I sometimes found crushing.

 

I think we also need to clarify what we mean by 'stress'. Recently this has come to mean anything that a person finds difficult....

Something can be hard without it being stressful. I recently damaged a ligament in my knee and though it was hard to walk and the physio has been painful, it has not been stressful

What was stressful was not being as mobile as I wanted to be for a while, but this was due to my lack of patience with myself.

 

There are difficulties in every walk of life and the Cross of the cloister is rather more than the separation from loved ones and the particular penitential practice of the order.

As has been said elsewhere, it is a life against nature, and the raw encounter with self that is hard.

 

 

[nikita92]

I had a experience...when I spoke (asked a question/made a comment) the sister would NOT look at me while responding. She would look at the other person (in the room) It REALLY bothered me. Sometimes little things can be stressors! If I had to live with her for years....UGHHH

[nikita92]

"I" doesn't belong in a community. Yet...basic manners apply to everyone! In or out of this world!