Spiritual Direction Dilemma

[Zoe1188]

Hi all!
So I've been discerning a vocation of about a year and although I don't feel called to life in a community right now, I do want to learn more about other forms of consecrated life, possibly CV or even hermit. My problem is, in my diocese there is not really much for spiritual direction particularly for discerning women. I was wondering if anyone has experience with receiving spiritual direction online. I know it's not as good as in person, but it might be better then nothing.
Any ideas

[brandelynmarie]

One does not always need to be face to face (altho that is ideal!) Maybe try Skype or even spiritual direction just by phone? Many holy people throughout the ages received spiritual direction old-school style: by letter ;) You have many options. :)

[Zoe1188]

One does not always need to be face to face (altho that is ideal!) Maybe try Skype or even spiritual direction just by phone? Many holy people throughout the ages received spiritual direction old-school style: by letter ;) You have many options. :)

Haha. I hadn't thought of that! Thanks! ;)

[Gabriela]

Try the OMV fathers: http://www.lantericenter.org/spiritualdirection.htm

 

They offer direction via Skype and phone. Their schedules are usually very full, so you may have to wait. But they are, from what I hear, VERY good at what they do.

[Hemma]

In my experience it is helpful if the respective priest knows you personally. I had a long-distance SD whom I visited once or twice a year and there was in the end so much of misunderstanding, not only of my person but also mutual, that we couldn't proceed. He changed a lot and I could never keep up with that. So did I. He always assumed things out of my utterances which might have been true for other women but not for me. Well, we all assume things out of our experience; without that we couldn't manage our daily life. But on long distance it can get wrong.

Now I have another long-distance SD, who knows me from earlier times - who knows me better. This time it should be working.

[Egeria]

In my experience it is helpful if the respective priest knows you personally. I had a long-distance SD whom I visited once or twice a year and there was in the end so much of misunderstanding, not only of my person but also mutual, that we couldn't proceed. He changed a lot and I could never keep up with that. So did I. He always assumed things out of my utterances which might have been true for other women but not for me. Well, we all assume things out of our experience; without that we couldn't manage our daily life. But on long distance it can get wrong.

Now I have another long-distance SD, who knows me from earlier times - who knows me better. This time it should be working.

I was going to say something similar before seeing what Senensis wrote. I've had a similar experience with someone who was very good, and who I still have great respect for, but who simply didn't know me or the situation I was in well enough. I think that long distance SD can be viable, but that it can also help if the person knows you outside of an online context.

[Gabriela]

I think what matters for long-distance spiritual direction is the frequency of meetings, not the distance. I also think it's important that the SD be able to see your nonverbal communication, so I would always choose Skype over phone when there was an option.

[Hemma]

True. The one it was not working with never had time for me. Once I had to wait half a year for a talk. (That was the moment when I decided "this doesn't work".) Of course there are misunderstandings without an end when you talk only once in a few months.

[Feankie]

Just got back from my Investiture in the Order of Malta, so I think I'll chime in.  As a trained, certified, yada yada, SD myself, I like to see my directees face to face -- lots of non-verbal body language stuff usually going on.  If there is truly an emergency, I will talk via phone or Skype, but it's not ideal.

 

I like to see my directees 1 time per month.  I don't charge anything, and I meet with prospective directees once or twice before we commit to see if we are a "good fit" for each other.