4th commandment

[Luthien]

Say a young man wants to date a young woman, and the parents are doing things to prevent them from seeing eachother more than once a month, should the young couple sneak behind their parents back?

What does the fourth commandment require a young woman of 18 to do?

(this is not me btw)

I need catechism proof.

[Cam42]

Luthien,

First off, I would never think that this is you....

I think that this speaks to authority and the lack thereof.

[quote]The fourth commandment is addressed expressly to children in their relationship to their father and mother, because this relationship is the most universal. It likewise concerns the ties of kinship between members of the extended family. It requires honor, affection, and gratitude toward elders and ancestors. Finally, it extends to the duties of pupils to teachers, employees to employers, subordinates to leaders, citizens to their country, and to those who administer or govern it.

This commandment includes and presupposes the duties of parents, instructors, teachers, leaders, magistrates, those who govern, all who exercise authority over others or over a community of persons. (CCC 2199)[/quote]

This is a universal truth. They should respect the wishes of those who exercise authority. Being a parent doesn't stop when one turns 18. This remains in effect until marriage when the couple leave the parents and then cleave unto themselves. However, due respect is still given to the parents.

[quote]As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him when it is for his good or that of the family. "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord."  Children should also obey the reasonable directions of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.

As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.  (CCC 2217)[/quote]

And I think that it is best summed up in this:
[quote]When they become adults, children have the right and duty to choose their profession and state of life. They should assume their new responsibilities within a trusting relationship with their parents, willingly asking and receiving their advice and counsel. [b]Parents should be careful not to exert pressure on their children either in the choice of a profession or in that of a spouse. This necessary restraint does not prevent them - quite the contrary from giving their children judicious advice, particularly when they are planning to start a family.[/b] (CCC 2230)[/quote]

And there you have it. I think that it is important to understand that this goes both ways. The persons involved need to approach and explain their need to date. The parents will give their reasonings for their actions and at that point, I think that the parties involved should look to the above catechisms and then proceed from there.

Cam