Need lots of prayers please

[GodChild]

I am mentally unwell - and on medication that is making me sick and I'm having trouble finding good help (psychologist)
I am feeling very suicidal at times to the point that I feel scared I might do something to myself.
I feel very tempted to hate God for this - its very tempting to blame Him even though I know that he is suffering with me.
In a way I feel honored that I can suffer this and bear it patiently as a proof of my love for him.
yes, love is the best way to go. I love St Therese (Little Flower)

I just need lots of prayers please