kujo Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 So, I dig this girl. But she lives in Massachusetts and I live in Florida. We've know each other awhile, and we are both into each other. But the distance is an issue. What do ya'll think of long-distance relationships? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmjtina Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 (edited) I don't know how old you are, but becoming better friends through e-mail and phone calls could help you discern if you want to carry on into a long distance relationship. It can help you grow closer (and the heart fonder) or it will have the exact opposite effect. I know some ppl here can say they did Long distance relationships which worked (and some even married, IcePrincess, Luthien, azelia, St. Collette and I know I'm forgetting some) and some can say it depends on the situation and the couple. pray about it. Take it to Jesus. Edited May 22, 2007 by jmjtina Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XIX Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 I can only speak for myself, but the distance factor is a chance I'd take and a cross I'd bear if I really liked the girl. Put another way, long distance all by itself wouldn't stop me. Your mileage may vary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmjtina Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 How I would love to be by your side, but our souls will meet by the tabernacle. -St. Terese of the Andes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaeology cat Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 My husband & I started dating when he was in TN and I was in FL. We had known each other at college, but I had graduated. It was something we prayed a lot about, emailed and talked on the phone, and then made a commitment to make it work. Obviously it did, since we've been married just over a year and are expecting our first child in January. But I can't emphasize enough the power of prayer in there. We prayed together over the phone, and did Bible studies together that way, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jckinsman Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 I would think that with the internet and such it is not as costly! As far as the whole"LOVE" factor, It is really a good way to really get to know eachother and not go to far with eachother! If it is something that blossoms,you two WILL find away to make it work! JC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kujo Posted May 22, 2007 Author Share Posted May 22, 2007 [quote name='jmjtina' post='1278926' date='May 22 2007, 01:11 AM']How I would love to be by your side, but our souls will meet by the tabernacle. -St. Terese of the Andes[/quote] That is beautiful.... Wow... Thank you so much for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proud2BCatholic139 Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 Long distance relationships, to me, are beautiful. From talking with my boyfriend, over the phone, e-mail, I grew and I am still growing and I am learning more about him, and I am learning my about myself. It has built our communication and actions. If you live one mile away or 1,000 miles away, Love will lead you together and God is love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MIKolbe Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 All you need is love. ~ The Beatles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IcePrincessKRS Posted May 22, 2007 Share Posted May 22, 2007 It can be hard, but you can make it work. I could go into all the trials we've gone through, but the end result for us has been that distance wasn't enough to break us apart (not from the start and certainly not now!). We dated 3 months long distance and became engaged; engagement lasted a year and a half (I insisted on graduating college before we got married). We have been married nearly 5 years now and for the past year and a half we have been apart by hundreds of miles (this past week the girls and I moved to Korea to be with Matt). We have grown closer with distance because you MUST communicate, there is no "just sitting quietly together." If you have had any time together distance will often bring you to a greater realization of how much that person means to you and cause you to try even harder to make things work. You persevere through the hard times because the other person means THAT much to you. The time apart makes you cherish every moment spent together. I'm blathering.... point is, if you want it you can make it work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luthien Posted May 23, 2007 Share Posted May 23, 2007 (edited) [quote name='IcePrincessKRS' post='1279451' date='May 22 2007, 09:33 PM']It can be hard, but you can make it work. I could go into all the trials we've gone through, but the end result for us has been that distance wasn't enough to break us apart (not from the start and certainly not now!). We dated 3 months long distance and became engaged; engagement lasted a year and a half (I insisted on gradating college before we got married). We have been married nearly 5 years now and for the past year and a half we have been apart by hundreds of miles (this past week the girls and I moved to Korea to be with Matt). We have grown closer with distance because you MUST communicate, there is no "just sitting quietly together." If you have had any time together distance will often bring you to a greater realization of how much that person means to you and cause you to try even harder to make things work. You persevere through the hard times because the other person means THAT much to you. The time apart makes you cherish every moment spent together. I'm blathering.... point is, if you want it you can make it work.[/quote] Aaaamen!! She makes some very good points. I met my husband through PhatMass, like jmjtina mentioned earlier. Of course, we were drawn to eachother not just physically(kinda hard when you've barely seen what they look like) but intellectually and spiritually. We we're both willing to go through Hell to be with eachother. Sometimes it was Hellish, seperation is not a cakewalk. There are times when I would have rather been on the rack than be seperated from him for a moment longer. But every moment of missing him was worth it. We were married a little over a month ago, and I barely remember how much pain missing him caused. I guess my point is, if you both love eachother, and are willing to make sacrifices for one another, you most certainly can sustain if not flourish your love for eachother. Thats my two cents Edited May 23, 2007 by Luthien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted May 23, 2007 Share Posted May 23, 2007 [quote name='jmjtina' post='1278910' date='May 21 2007, 11:47 PM']I know some ppl here can say they did Long distance relationships which worked (and some even married, IcePrincess, Luthien, azelia, St. Collette and I know I'm forgetting some)[/quote] Well, we wouldn't want to mention the men on PM who fell in love through it... : Kujo, I'm engaged to Jennie (St. Colette) and we've had a lot of struggles because of distance, but it can also be very rewarding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
franciscanheart Posted May 23, 2007 Share Posted May 23, 2007 [quote name='jmjtina' post='1278910' date='May 21 2007, 10:47 PM']azelia, St. Collette[/quote] these two aren't married. st colette is engaged and azaelia is dating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birgitta Noel Posted May 23, 2007 Share Posted May 23, 2007 It can work ( I speak from experience) but it can also be very challenging. For my husband and I it prepared us for this time during marriage when we are apart. It can be hard because when you meet someone and spend time with them in person you get to know their expressions, their idosynacricies etc much more quickly. It just takes time. In some ways it's like seeing the movie and THEN reading the book. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruviel Posted May 23, 2007 Share Posted May 23, 2007 I think to maintain a long distance relationship you must first have the grounds of a very strong relationship. It is extremely hard, and most people go into one without having the willingness and the ability to get through it together. It is a major test in their relationship that few will pass. It depends allot on the people, the character of them and how much they are willing to sacrifice. That is what love is all about, right? Sacrifice, patience, selflessness, and understanding. That means you must bear with your girlfriend or boyfriend, you must be patient with them, and you must communicate with them. If you feel that they aren't doing enough to maintain it then speak to them about it. If you feel you can't wait it out then speak to them about it. If you are completely crazy about this person then begin by building a relationship first. Know where you stand and perhaps you will get alittle more insight on how far you will be able to go with this person. Are they capable of withstanding many hard ships of distance and silence? Are you? Are you mature enough to take this on? Just some thoughts perhaps you should consider before diving into a long distant relationship. Good luck and God Bless, -uruviel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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