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A Little Heads Up


Chaya

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Hello ya'll. i know i haven't been around for a long time... i simply was too depressed.

after my husband definitely forbade me to become catholic, i stopped going to mass for some time because it simply was too painful. but after stopping going there started a period of intense internal turmoil and being torn apart between christianity and judaism.

i went to mass recently a couple of times, but i have to admit that the first time being back again was really difficult/painful. but, it was good as well.

somehow, i really feel like i'm stuck in the middle. but i got some comfort from Mary, and somehow i felt very at peace and somewhat closer to God (i hope that doesn't sound silly) when i saw a picture of Padre Pio (but i didn't know who he was, nor do i know much about him yet).

and how have you been doing?

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+J.M.J.+
Chaya, i am sorry to hear about your struggles. :sign: i will pray for you today. please don't give up hope! pray for st. monica's intercession on behalf of your husband (she had to pray for 20 years before her son and husband converted!). God bless you and your family! :)

as far as me, i've been pregnant! :))

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cmotherofpirl

I'm so glad you stopped back in, you are still on my prayer list :) I've become a grannie since you were here last :D.

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Archaeology cat

Praying for you & your husband (and thank you for checking in!). I love St Monica, and will ask her to pray for your husband, as well.

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AdesteFidelis

I'm new here, so we don't know each other (yet!), but I am keeping you in my prayers. Your post broke my heart!

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[quote name='Lil Red' post='1797303' date='Mar 4 2009, 08:25 PM']as far as me, i've been pregnant! :))[/quote]

you've [i]been[/i] pregnant? oh wow, how wonderful! congratulations!
and thank you for your prayers!

20 years of praying sure is a long time - she must have been a champion of perseverance.

Edited by Chaya
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[quote name='cmotherofpirl' post='1797335' date='Mar 4 2009, 09:18 PM']I'm so glad you stopped back in, you are still on my prayer list :) I've become a grannie since you were here last :D.[/quote]

thank you for your prayers, too - i sure appreciate them. i am sure all those prayers adding up are what made me stick to christianity instead of turning completely my back on it.

and becoming a grannie must be so wonderful! congratulations! :topsy:

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[quote name='HisChildForever' post='1797339' date='Mar 4 2009, 09:20 PM']I don't think your husband can "forbid" you from going to Church.

:sadder:[/quote]

well he did state it very clear that he does not want me to join the catholic church and have the children join either. that would entail too much for him to want it or be comfortable with. heck, he even said that me going to mass on sat 7pm (there's no mass on sundays here, village is too small) instead of the sunday service is too much of a changement for him. in my heart, i can believe whatever i want, but concerning family practice, no.

so i guess i'll stay a member of the church i'm in, and stay involved there, and go to mass by myself whenever i can, and do my own set of private devotions (rosary - hoping it'll find the neccessary discipline again). i talked with the priests and they're fine with it.

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[quote name='Archaeology cat' post='1797382' date='Mar 4 2009, 10:06 PM']Praying for you & your husband (and thank you for checking in!). I love St Monica, and will ask her to pray for your husband, as well.[/quote]

thank you! :)

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[quote name='AdesteFidelis' post='1797432' date='Mar 4 2009, 11:20 PM']I'm new here, so we don't know each other (yet!), but I am keeping you in my prayers. Your post broke my heart![/quote]

thank you very much!

i'm not a very active poster, but maybe we'll get to know each other.
thank you for your prayers.

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HisChildForever

[quote name='Chaya' post='1797952' date='Mar 5 2009, 02:44 AM']well he did state it very clear that he does not want me to join the catholic church and have the children join either. that would entail too much for him to want it or be comfortable with. heck, he even said that me going to mass on sat 7pm (there's no mass on sundays here, village is too small) instead of the sunday service is too much of a changement for him. in my heart, i can believe whatever i want, but concerning family practice, no.[/quote]

Frankly, there has to be a better reason than this. You being out of the house for an hour every Saturday evening is too much of a change for him? Unfortunately I think he may misunderstand Catholicism and feels that he needs to protect you from it. (Or maybe he just really holds on to tradition, like all of you going to his church together.) You probably did this, but - did you try sitting down with him and having a discussion? Perhaps invite the local parish priest? Your husband may feel that you belonging to the Church and your children belonging will have him feeling left out and, at the same time, pressured to attend as well. Of course the best case scenario is that you and the children do go to Mass every Sunday, and if this happens you can give him an invitation every week with no pressure attached so he is more comfortable about it.

I dislike your use of "forbid" because while wives do submit to their husband's authority, when it comes to matters of faith and God the husband cannot tell the wife what she can and can not do. It's the same reasoning with our parents. Maybe an eighteen year old just enrolled in RCIA and his parents do not approve, so even though technically he is disobeying their wishes, God's wish for him to be Catholic overrides that.

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so actually, being where i am is entirely my fault. ok.

except for my mother, my entire family would kinda disown my would i become catholic, and that is ok for me, nothing that would hinder me. but peace within my little family and with my husband is very important to me, and i rather have it that one day he'll come and agree (i am in no ways pressuring him as that could/would have just the opposite effect) than me creating upheaval and dissent in my family.

it's actually a bit like the Rabbi - when i asked him if it would be possible for me to convert to be fully "technically" jewish, he said no problem all i have to do before is divorce my husband. and i refused to divorce.

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[quote name='Chaya' post='1797950' date='Mar 5 2009, 12:34 AM']you've [i]been[/i] pregnant? oh wow, how wonderful! congratulations!
and thank you for your prayers!

20 years of praying sure is a long time - she must have been a champion of perseverance.[/quote]
+J.M.J.+
well, still am pregnant. only about 7 more weeks to go! :)

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