Guest CitiesInDust Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 Some of the reasons that I stopped going to church in the first place 1.) Regardless of how much I read and how much I participated in mass and prayed, nothing ever got better, so all I was left with was a huge burden on my chest and felt guilty about being who I was. 2.) Mass was boring to me. I would find myself getting distracted all of the time and my mind constantly wondering, and once again, I would feel guilty for that. I am aware of all of my imperfections, but to constantly be aware of them did wonders for my self being believe me lol. 3.) A lot of things that I would read would attack leaders from the Protestant churches and Muslim world, but Rome would defend some people who commited the same atrocities as the others. 4.) I am a leader, by design. I felt like I was being placed in an Autocratic relationship with the Church it's self and was losing power over myself, and that is by far the worst feeling ever, because I was left lost and felt hopeless. Those are just some of the many problems that I had. But, through all of this, apart of me still misses it, it makes me want to go back to Rome and just do things on different terms than when I went last time. Partially because I am too proud to give up on anything, and through a lot of the bad times, I definitely did have some good ones. I realize things don't happen overnight, and perhaps I was just doing too much too soon when I was in Rome. Some of the doctrine, I don't understand, and I think goes into a little too much detail over the centuries, but I understand it had to because of the various theologies that were creeping into Rome, but I think I wouldn't worry about it if I were to go back. I do sometimes miss it. I am not a hater, I just have certain issues, and I would like for them to be resolved, if anyone could reply I would appreciate it. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dominicansoul Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 I think it is wonderful that you are asking these questions, and that you are seeking to clarify your doubts and your troubles. The first thing I would suggest is to work on your prayer life. Do you truly have a relationship with Jesus Christ? Only if you have a relationship with Him will your Faith mean so much more and make so much more sense. Mass isn't boring in the least! It's only if you find yourself there without allowing Jesus' Presence to fill your heart and soul that you will find Mass dull. I was just at Mass. People come to Mass and they don't know what it's all about. They read the prayers by rote, without putting their hearts into it. But if you listened to every word that comes out of the mouth of the priest...if you paid attention to every word you proclaim, for example, in the Creed...each word is so powerful. [i]We BELIEVE in God[/i]... [i]HOLY! HOLY! HOLY, LORD GOD OF POWER AND MIGHT! Heaven and earth are filled with Your glory![/i] [i]THIS IS MY BODY, THAT IS GIVEN UP FOR YOU... THIS IS MY BLOOD, DO THIS IN MEMORY OF ME...[/i] [i]LAMB OF GOD, who takes away the sins of the world. Have MERCY on us! Lord, I am not worthy to receive You, but only say the word and I shall be healed.[/i] Enter into the Mass as if you are the only one there, as if the Lord has invited only you to come before Him to receive His instruction. You are receiving words from Christ, and responding to Him. Then I assure you, Mass will not be boring to you anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abercius24 Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 (edited) To me it sounds like you are more of an introvert -- someone who prefers to worship in an solemn atmosphere without a lot of "group activity". I recommend trying the Latin mass for 3 months or so. You'll find it very foreign at first, but give it time and you'll find yourself quite fascinated by it. Frankly speaking, I don't know how the average Catholic doesn't get bored without all the rich tradition our Western Rite has -- tradition that cannot be ignored when attending a Latin mass. Every diocese usually has at least 1 Latin mass every Sunday. Call your diocesan office and ask them if they know where one is regularly held. And thank you for considering returning to the faith. Each of us blesses each other by our presence in the Church! So thank you for blessing us! Edited May 3, 2009 by abercius24 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaeology cat Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 Regarding the leadership aspect, is there anything specific? There are lots of ways to serve in the Church, leading various programmes and such. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Adam Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 You are not returning to Rome, you are returning to Christ's Church. There are goats and sheep. Good and ugly things happen in the Catholic Church because her people are feebly trying to strive for holiness. I would suggest learning more about what happens at Mass (such as reading "If your Mind Wanders at Mass" or "The Lamb's Supper"). I've never been bored since learning about the deep mysteries we take part in, but was always bored in liturgical services before that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest CitiesInDust Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 It's funny that you mention that because I did start off in the Latin mass it was my favorite (and I think that is why I never did get into the mass before, because the latin mass I went to was not available anymore). I've been to different byzantine rites as well. By leadership I mean that it is in my nature to take action, I have a passion for working with people, and I always try to find ways to better myself so I can make it in this world. I did have a relationship with Christ, and then one day it stopped. There are a lot of things that I struggle with, and I always felt guilty about it, that I almost forgot how to live. I would fall into periods of serious depression and then would come out of it, it even hampered my relationship with other people. I noticed that other people didn't have the same problems as I did, and to me, that just indicated that something wasn't right. I would always pester my priests about giving me advice, and how to take the most basic steps, I'm sure after a certain amount of time I would have forgotten how to breathe. That is definitely not who I want to be ever. That was one of the other serious red flags that I got. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HisChildForever Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 You should read the Lamb's Supper by Scott Hahn to correct the "I find Mass boring" mentality. It is a super quick read too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hassan Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='CitiesInDust' post='1856453' date='May 3 2009, 12:28 PM']Some of the reasons that I stopped going to church in the first place 1.) Regardless of how much I read and how much I participated in mass and prayed, nothing ever got better, so all I was left with was a huge burden on my chest and felt guilty about being who I was. 2.) Mass was boring to me. I would find myself getting distracted all of the time and my mind constantly wondering, and once again, I would feel guilty for that. I am aware of all of my imperfections, but to constantly be aware of them did wonders for my self being believe me lol. 3.) A lot of things that I would read would attack leaders from the Protestant churches and Muslim world, but Rome would defend some people who commited the same atrocities as the others. 4.) I am a leader, by design. I felt like I was being placed in an Autocratic relationship with the Church it's self and was losing power over myself, and that is by far the worst feeling ever, because I was left lost and felt hopeless. Those are just some of the many problems that I had. But, through all of this, apart of me still misses it, it makes me want to go back to Rome and just do things on different terms than when I went last time. Partially because I am too proud to give up on anything, and through a lot of the bad times, I definitely did have some good ones. I realize things don't happen overnight, and perhaps I was just doing too much too soon when I was in Rome. Some of the doctrine, I don't understand, and I think goes into a little too much detail over the centuries, but I understand it had to because of the various theologies that were creeping into Rome, but I think I wouldn't worry about it if I were to go back. I do sometimes miss it. I am not a hater, I just have certain issues, and I would like for them to be resolved, if anyone could reply I would appreciate it. Thanks[/quote] Did anyone else think this would be about the Scott Hahn book? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kafka Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='Hassan' post='1856490' date='May 3 2009, 01:42 PM']Did anyone else think this would be about the Scott Hahn book?[/quote] dont make me comment about Scott Hahn. Ugly things may be said CitiesinDust welcome! I was curious as to what type of personal prayers you used to say? Since I used to suffer from depression and self-consciousness beforfe my sins and faults, but a particular prayer helped me, as well as some books. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaeology cat Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='Hassan' post='1856490' date='May 3 2009, 06:42 PM']Did anyone else think this would be about the Scott Hahn book?[/quote] I did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest CitiesInDust Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 I never had a remedy or a stanza prayer that I would use to combat depression or anything, I would offer a few words every so often. The prayer that I used most by far was The Jesus Prayer, I would try to say it throughout the day. I would try to fast at least once a week, and so on. I know about the theology behind the mass, and it still didn't make things better. It seemed like the more I went the less that I appreciated it. So a couple of times a week turned into once a week, and then to once a month, and then never. As far as Scott Hahn goes, I knew he had a book with the title or similar too lol. I was hoping that wouldn't happen haha, but I guess it's inevitable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hassan Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='kafka' post='1856516' date='May 3 2009, 01:19 PM']dont make me comment about Scott Hahn. Ugly things may be said CitiesinD[/quote] feel free to share Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kafka Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='Hassan' post='1856576' date='May 3 2009, 03:29 PM']feel free to share [/quote] I might offend or scandalize some people around here so I will hold my tongue. Serious though, some of his writings I've seen make me cringe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kafka Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 [quote name='CitiesInDust' post='1856571' date='May 3 2009, 03:24 PM']I never had a remedy or a stanza prayer that I would use to combat depression or anything, I would offer a few words every so often. The prayer that I used most by far was The Jesus Prayer, I would try to say it throughout the day. I would try to fast at least once a week, and so on. I know about the theology behind the mass, and it still didn't make things better. It seemed like the more I went the less that I appreciated it. So a couple of times a week turned into once a week, and then to once a month, and then never.[/quote] Have you ever tried praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groo the Wanderer Posted May 3, 2009 Share Posted May 3, 2009 Hiya! I would recommend you check out Catholics Come Home: [url="http://www.catholicscomehome.org/former-Catholic.phtml"]http://www.catholicscomehome.org/former-Catholic.phtml[/url] This site addresses so many of the questions that you and other Catholics have that have left the Church for whatever reason, but now are thinking of returning. Methinks you may mind the answers you seek there , or at least the start. God Bless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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