The Apostles And The Early Church

[Nihil Obstat]

No knives. If this happens it's likely at school.
So I've got a blunt six inch metal rod, two keys, and some pens. Unfortunately no fountain pens.

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 12:45 AM' timestamp='1259473505' post='2010959']
No knives. If this happens it's likely at school.
So I've got a blunt six inch metal rod, two keys, and some pens. Unfortunately no fountain pens.
[/quote]

Run to an art room or to a professor's desk and grab some scissors fool!

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='28 November 2009 - 11:49 PM' timestamp='1259473742' post='2010962']
Run to an art room or to a professor's desk and grab some scissors fool!
[/quote]
It's an enormous campus!! Art is so far away, they'd be dead four times over. The very best I might have is plastic cutlery and chopsticks, but only if we're in the food court.

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 12:52 AM' timestamp='1259473962' post='2010968']
It's an enormous campus!! Art is so far away, they'd be dead four times over. The very best I might have is plastic cutlery and chopsticks, but only if we're in the food court.
[/quote]

Alright...here's what you do...tell your friend to call 911 (or whatever the heck it is up there in Alberta). Then, take a 1 litre (or 24oz) bottle of Diet Mountain Dew...CHUG IT...then close the lid back on it. Now jump on it and stomp it down. Hopefully the noise of the explosion gives the patient an extra adrenal kick and when you blow out the wall of the plastic you can use your key and hands to tear out a relatively sharp piece of thin plastic. Tear a strip of this plastic; have someone hold the skin over the space between the Adam's apple and the ride of cartilage below it. Puncture it with the sharp point of the plastic piece. Try and open the space a bit and quickly insert the Bic pen tube.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='28 November 2009 - 11:56 PM' timestamp='1259474208' post='2010969']
Alright...here's what you do...tell your friend to call 911 (or whatever the heck it is up there in Alberta). Then, take a 1 litre (or 24oz) bottle of Diet Mountain Dew...CHUG IT...then close the lid back on it. Now jump on it and stomp it down. Hopefully the noise of the explosion gives the patient an extra adrenal kick and when you blow out the wall of the plastic you can use your key and hands to tear out a relatively sharp piece of thin plastic. Tear a strip of this plastic; have someone hold the skin over the space between the Adam's apple and the ride of cartilage below it. Puncture it with the sharp point of the plastic piece. Try and open the space a bit and quickly insert the Bic pen tube.
[/quote]
Wow, this sounds tricky. I just realized that I'll be able to break some glass bottles if I'm near a food vendor, so that will make that better. The adrenaline rush is tricky though. What if I slapped him around a bit?

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 01:03 AM' timestamp='1259474615' post='2010973']
Wow, this sounds tricky. I just realized that I'll be able to break some glass bottles if I'm near a food vendor, so that will make that better. The adrenaline rush is tricky though. What if I slapped him around a bit?
[/quote]

Glass would be even better. Remember sterility is essential...even in an emergency situation you should be as asceptic as possible. I threw the adrenaline rush comment in there for flavor. In reality, the sensation of not being able to breathe at all would be sufficient to get as much natural epinephrine flowing in him as anything you could do.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='29 November 2009 - 12:09 AM' timestamp='1259474983' post='2010976']
Glass would be even better. Remember sterility is essential...even in an emergency situation you should be as asceptic as possible. I threw the adrenaline rush comment in there for flavor. In reality, the sensation of not being able to breathe at all would be sufficient to get as much natural epinephrine flowing in him as anything you could do.
[/quote]
I hear urine is sterile. Will that help?

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 01:10 AM' timestamp='1259475037' post='2010977']
I hear urine is sterile. Will that help?
[/quote]

Haha. Not exactly. While a midstream urine sample from a healthy person should be pretty much sterile (the initial stream of urine is not typically sterile since it 'washes out' the non-sterile portions of the urethra). However rinsing with something sterile won't kill the germs that are already on something...it just means you aren't adding new germs. It could possibly have a diluting effect on the glass shard I suppose. Actually using a cigarette lighter on the sharp edge of the glass for 10 seconds and then using midstream urine to cool the glass off before incision could work...

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='29 November 2009 - 12:19 AM' timestamp='1259475553' post='2010984']
Haha. Not exactly. While a midstream urine sample from a healthy person should be pretty much sterile (the initial stream of urine is not typically sterile since it 'washes out' the non-sterile portions of the urethra). However rinsing with something sterile won't kill the germs that are already on something...it just means you aren't adding new germs. It could possibly have a diluting effect on the glass shard I suppose. Actually using a cigarette lighter on the sharp edge of the glass for 10 seconds and then using midstream urine to cool the glass off before incision could work...
[/quote]
Ahhhhh, I see. So I need to take up smoking. Which is better, cigars or cigarettes?

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 01:30 AM' timestamp='1259476240' post='2010991']
Ahhhhh, I see. So I need to take up smoking. Which is better, cigars or cigarettes?
[/quote]

I don't smoke. Anytime I've drank enough to smoke the cigar handed to me, I regretted for days. I could not get the nasty taste out of my mouth no matter how much gum I chewed or how many times I brushed my teeth. And NO, Urine would NOT have helped. Now I'm going to bed.

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='29 November 2009 - 12:34 AM' timestamp='1259476457' post='2010993']
I don't smoke. Anytime I've drank enough to smoke the cigar handed to me, I regretted for days. I could not get the nasty taste out of my mouth no matter how much gum I chewed or how many times I brushed my teeth. And NO, Urine would NOT have helped. Now I'm going to bed.
[/quote]
Ok.... so what I'm getting from this is cigars+urine = bad, but on their own, urine is neutral and cigars are handy. I think I'm starting to figure this out.

The MCATS aren't hard, right? I figure if I learn this easily I could be an MD by next year.

[Veridicus]

[quote name='Nihil Obstat' date='29 November 2009 - 01:37 AM' timestamp='1259476669' post='2010996']
MCATS aren't hard, right? I figure if I learn this easily I could be an MD by next year.
[/quote]

I can't really guess how it is in the Canadian system....

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='Veridicus' date='29 November 2009 - 09:59 AM' timestamp='1259510398' post='2011066']
I can't really guess how it is in the Canadian system....
[/quote]
Actually for med school it's more or less the same thing.

[cmotherofpirl]

[Nihil Obstat]

I don't feel guilty when I hijack threads that I started. Maybe I should, but I just don't.

[Lil Red]

+J.M.J.+
it's a great way to go to the lame board though.