Is Kissing Before Marriage Sinful, What Do You Think, And Why?

[CatherineM]

I read a story on Ave Maria about a former nun who wanted to save her first kiss for the wedding. Then she found out that in her husband's Eastern Rite church the "kiss the bride" thing isn't a custom. She was kind of crushed by that, but his pastor said it wasn't a problem to add that to the service.

[dominicansoul]

i grew up believing all passionate kissing was a sin before marriage...

...and i remain unsullied because of abiding by that rule...

...and am forever grateful for that...

[Ephrem Augustine]

[quote name='dominicansoul' date='14 March 2010 - 11:54 AM' timestamp='1268585658' post='2072924']
i grew up believing all passionate kissing was a sin before marriage...

...and i remain unsullied because of abiding by that rule...

...and am forever grateful for that...
[/quote]
God Bless you, what a way to live without regret!

[rachael]

some people are just horrible at kissing.

[jeffpugh]

[quote name='CatherineM' date='14 March 2010 - 10:05 AM' timestamp='1268579155' post='2072887']
I read a story on Ave Maria about a former nun who wanted to save her first kiss for the wedding. Then she found out that in her husband's Eastern Rite church the "kiss the bride" thing isn't a custom. She was kind of crushed by that, but his pastor said it wasn't a problem to add that to the service.
[/quote]
... why not save 'til after?

[quote name='rachael' date='14 March 2010 - 01:54 PM' timestamp='1268592893' post='2072987']
some people are just horrible at kissing.


[/quote]
Lawl. Is that really possible?

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='Tridenteen' date='13 March 2010 - 10:05 PM' timestamp='1268532336' post='2072576']
Basically, no one seems to know whether or not there is actually anything in Canon Law discussing kissing...I already asked at the QA subphorum, and there doesn't seem to be anything really much in Canon Law regarding it. And, if you were told it would send you to hell if you : air, french, on the cheek, and so on, kissed (with non parental family members, friends, and so on) before marriage...how would you respond Thank ya'all for your input! [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/blowkiss.gif[/img]
[/quote]
I told you in my response in Q&A that there is no canon law regarding kissing.

I also told you that some of this could depend on personal limits. For some people, a few kisses could be a near occasion of sin. For others, a single kiss might be too much.

[Thy Geekdom Come]

[quote name='CatherineM' date='14 March 2010 - 11:05 AM' timestamp='1268579155' post='2072887']
I read a story on Ave Maria about a former nun who wanted to save her first kiss for the wedding. Then she found out that in her husband's Eastern Rite church the "kiss the bride" thing isn't a custom. She was kind of crushed by that, but his pastor said it wasn't a problem to add that to the service.
[/quote]
It's not in the Latin Rite rubrics, either, but most priests add it in.

[rachael]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='14 March 2010 - 03:16 PM' timestamp='1268594217' post='2072995']



Lawl. Is that really possible?
[/quote]

[Vincent Vega]

[quote name='Sacred Music Man' date='14 March 2010 - 03:16 PM' timestamp='1268594217' post='2072995']

Lawl. Is that really possible?
[/quote]
It's like Louis Armstrong's quote about Jazz:
"If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know...."

[Jesus_lol]

[quote name='Innocent' date='14 March 2010 - 03:42 AM' timestamp='1268563378' post='2072847']
Interesting discussion.

The only sure-fire way to stay on the right side of this issue seems to be to let your parents arrange your marriage and not meet the future bride (or groom, as the case may be) in private before the date of the wedding.

I know some men who had their first glimpse of the bride at the wedding ceremony.
[/quote]

http://www.allvoices.com/contributed-news/5212659-dubai-ambassador-was-cheated-to-marry-bearded-wife

[KeenanParkerII]

Some people are attracted to cross-eyed bearded people okai!

[Norseman82]

[quote name='mommas_boy' date='13 March 2010 - 10:28 PM' timestamp='1268533724' post='2072594']
my fiancee
[/quote]

OK, when did THIS happen?????

[laetitia crucis]

Call me a prude (or a "romantic" ), but I've always wanted the [i]only [/i]person that I've ever (romantically) kissed to be my husband. The only way to "guarantee" that would be to have that first kiss at the wedding of after the wedding. And well, probably because I am a prude, I'd prefer after the wedding, without an audience.

However, I most definitely would not condemn anyone that believes otherwise.

[Tridenteen]

[quote name='Raphael' date='14 March 2010 - 02:29 PM' timestamp='1268594974' post='2073005']
I told you in my response in Q&A that there is no canon law regarding kissing.

I also told you that some of this could depend on personal limits. For some people, a few kisses could be a near occasion of sin. For others, a single kiss might be too much.
[/quote]


JMJ
I know you told me that, and I don't think I worded that right. I wanted other people's opinions, and see if they had any teaching on it from their church, favorite saint or anything. Sadly, the issue has been raised to life again by the family. I am also now looking for things to say when proclamations of "That movie is a sin, and if you watch it you will go to Hell..." an the like are made. There is a high chance I might have to be in contact with them and friends, and I am planning to say the Rosary with them (all 15 decades if necessary) for something to do. Maybe someone else has some ideas? I have kind of run out of them, since they eat crayones,markers, and paper...aren't allowed to watch a long list of movies...and well, can't play games for over 5 minutes. The Rosary is my last resort, I have "fled" to my Mother for aid?

Edited for spelling check!

Edited March 15, 2010 by Tridenteen

[Vincent Vega]

[quote name='Tridenteen' date='14 March 2010 - 09:12 PM' timestamp='1268615555' post='2073212']Sadly, the issue has been raised to life again by the family. I am also now looking for things to say when proclamations of "That movie is a sin, and if you watch it you will go to Hell..."
[/quote]
http://usccb.org/movies/
USCCB Office for Film and Broadcasting.
They provide reviews and ratings for virtually every major movie produced in the US.

[tinytherese]

It's funny how centuries ago kissing someone on the lips before marriage was actually regarded as scandalous (at least in Great Britian,) so scandalous in fact that a couple found kissing would have to get married in order to patch it up. Oh my, the people of those days must be turning in their graves in total disgust.

There's nothing immoral about chastely kissing before marriage. I remember reading this one section in "Christian Courtship in an Oversexed World" that addressed physicall displays of affection in courtship. The author said that chastely kissing, holding hands, hugging, etc. were just fine. Desiring that kind of affection from our beloved is normal and a natural desire. The only thing is, that such displays of affection are meant to be [i]given and received in love,[/i] but not taken merely for our own selfish pleasure.

I'm 21 and I still haven't had my first kiss yet. If we're supposed to be kissed by 15 or whatever in our culture, then I'm definitely not following that trend. I'd rather have my kisses actually mean something and not do it [i]merely[/i] to say that I've done it or "gotten it over with."

Come to think of it, I remember during my freshman year of college when some other girls were talking in our resident hall's computer suite and one of them was showing off a picture of her new stripper boyfriend to someone. She got to talking about her sex life (too much information girl!) and the one admitted that she was still a virgin. The first girl seemed surprised and asked how old she was. The second girl responded that she would be turning 19 soon and that first one gave her a bit of a hard time for that. She insisted that she was sure that there were 19 year olds who were virgins. That's when I chimed in to say that I was still one.

[Ed Normile]

Judas greeted Jesus with a kiss, and betrayal.

Jacob kisses his father Isaac (Gen. 27:27). Esau greets his brother Jacob with a kiss (Gen. 33:4). Laban kisses his grandchildren (Gen. 31:55). Naomi kisses her daughters-in-law (Ruth 1:9). The Ephesian believers kiss Paul (Acts 20:37). Four times Paul instructs churches to “greet one another with a holy kiss (Rom. 16:16, 1 Cor. 16:20, 2 Cor. 13:12, 1 Thes. 5:26). Peter instructs believers to “greet one another with a kiss of love” (1 Pet. 5:14).
It seems the bible is full of kissey-kissey type stuff! [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/saint.gif[/img]

ed

[Nihil Obstat]

[quote name='USAirwaysIHS' date='14 March 2010 - 08:19 PM' timestamp='1268615961' post='2073215']
http://usccb.org/movies/
USCCB Office for Film and Broadcasting.
They provide reviews and ratings for virtually every major movie produced in the US.
[/quote]
I don't like that site.
They consider Lethal Weapon to be "Morally Objectionable".

[Vincent Vega]

Tis better to err on the side of caution, nay?

[CatherineM]

[quote name='laetitia crucis' date='14 March 2010 - 06:03 PM' timestamp='1268611395' post='2073165']
Call me a prude (or a "romantic" ), but I've always wanted the [i]only [/i]person that I've ever (romantically) kissed to be my husband. The only way to "guarantee" that would be to have that first kiss at the wedding of after the wedding. And well, probably because I am a prude, I'd prefer after the wedding, without an audience.

However, I most definitely would not condemn anyone that believes otherwise.
[/quote]
I also didn't want to kiss him at the wedding in front of an audience. He practically dipped me. I almost became a widow right there.