OnlySunshine Posted March 15, 2011 Posted March 15, 2011 I just got a phone call a little while ago from my parish priest and we are meeting tomorrow at 2pm! He sounded really enthusiastic about helping me discern, so, if all goes well tomorrow (which I'm sure it will), I plan to ask him to become my regular spiritual director. Please pray for me! I am going to be writing down some key points that I want to discuss since I tend to go blank during meetings if I don't have an outline. In meetings with my past spiritual director, I often forgot to talk about something important. I'm very happy he's able to meet with me despite his busy schedule. Please pray for him as well. I admire him for the work he is doing in our parish, promoting vocations and refreshing ministries, etc. He is a very nice man.
HopefulBride Posted March 15, 2011 Posted March 15, 2011 (edited) Definitely sending prayers both of your ways. About writing down your questions and stuff. I found that to be very useful to me during my discernment journey; My OCD self went out and bout a small notebook (enough to fit in my purse but big enough that one page holds lots of info) I find that in times of meditation and mental prayer some thoughts come to mind either questions or a stumbling block that I feel I need to bring up to my SD and it's helped to guide our conversations. I even jot down questions people ask me about my faith and my discernment (either that I found strange or that I couldn't somehow answer) Just bring an open heart and an open mind to your meeting with him and God will take care of the rest. I am so very happy for you and the possibilities you are opening yourself to. May your meeting yield much fruit. HB [b]p.s.[/b] two years later, I still have a notebook that I jot down stuff in; the only difference is now it is bigger and it is a three subject notebook. LOL. I am amazed to read back to a year ago and I can see that my relationship with the Lord has changed significantly and I have matured a lot spiritually. There's still more work to be done but I'm hopeful.... Edited March 15, 2011 by HopefulBride
OnlySunshine Posted March 15, 2011 Author Posted March 15, 2011 [quote name='HopefulBride' timestamp='1300199780' post='2220865'] Definitely sending prayers both of your ways. About writing down your questions and stuff. I found that to be very useful to me during my discernment journey; My OCD self went out and bout a small notebook (enough to fit in my purse but big enough that one page holds lots of info) I find that in times of meditation and mental prayer some thoughts come to mind either questions or a stumbling block that I feel I need to bring up to my SD and it's helped to guide our conversations. I even jot down questions people ask me about my faith and my discernment (either that I found strange or that I couldn't somehow answer) Just bring an open heart and an open mind to your meeting with him and God will take care of the rest. I am so very happy for you and the possibilities you are opening yourself to. May your meeting yield much fruit. HB [b]p.s.[/b] two years later, I still have a notebook that I jot down stuff in; the only difference is now it is bigger and it is a three subject notebook. LOL. I am amazed to read back to a year ago and I can see that my relationship with the Lord has changed significantly and I have matured a lot spiritually. There's still more work to be done but I'm hopeful.... [/quote] LOL, I just recently started journalling as a resolution for Lent. My mom bought me a journal the other day at a bookstore that has the quote of Jeremiah 29:11. I love that quote! She bought it under the condition "if I will actually use it" and I don't think that will be a problem. It's spiral-bound with lined pages that have a little Bible quote at the bottom of each. It looks just like this: [center][img]http://g.christianbook.com/g/oversize/3/362543o.jpg[/img][/center] My mom told me that if I had nothing to write about, I could use the Bible verses on the bottom and write my thoughts on them.
MargaretTeresa Posted March 15, 2011 Posted March 15, 2011 YAYAYAYAUAUAUAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!! *happy dance* prayers for you both. I'm still trying to figure out a way to get my pastor to help me...but whatevers! *continues happy dance* Pax and God bless, hon!
OnlySunshine Posted March 15, 2011 Author Posted March 15, 2011 [quote name='MargaretTeresa' timestamp='1300203075' post='2220873'] YAYAYAYAUAUAUAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!! *happy dance* prayers for you both. I'm still trying to figure out a way to get my pastor to help me...but whatevers! *continues happy dance* Pax and God bless, hon! [/quote] Thank you. It's difficult, for sure, to find a pastor who has enough time on his hands to assist. It took me about a year to find the first one (at a different Church than my home parish) and it took much persistence on my part to get him to agree to meet me on a regular basis. This time, I'm hoping that my pastor of my Church will be receptive to meeting regularly, that is if he has enough time. Otherwise, I will ask if it can be semi-regularly.
TeresaBenedicta Posted March 15, 2011 Posted March 15, 2011 Definitely saying a few prayers for you! As for writing things down... I do it all the time. Even if it's just a few words to remind me of what it was I want to talk about. During my last meeting with my s/d, I got through most the meeting without referencing it. Then he asked me, "Anything else?" So I pulled out my sheet from brievary just to check and [i]he reached over and grabbed it out of my hands, saying, "May I?" as he took it from me![/i] LOL. I was definitely caught off guard by it!
OnlySunshine Posted March 15, 2011 Author Posted March 15, 2011 [quote name='TeresaBenedicta' timestamp='1300228484' post='2220969'] Definitely saying a few prayers for you! As for writing things down... I do it all the time. Even if it's just a few words to remind me of what it was I want to talk about. During my last meeting with my s/d, I got through most the meeting without referencing it. Then he asked me, "Anything else?" So I pulled out my sheet from brievary just to check and [i]he reached over and grabbed it out of my hands, saying, "May I?" as he took it from me![/i] LOL. I was definitely caught off guard by it! [/quote] Oh, my! I would be caught off guard as well! I'm sure my face would go completely flushed. Hehe! Thank you for your prayers. I'll let you all know how it goes after my meeting tomorrow.
Cherie Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1300230820' post='2220979'] Thank you for your prayers. I'll let you all know how it goes after my meeting tomorrow. [/quote] Please do! We are looking forward to it, and please know you are in my thoughts and prayers!
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='CherieMadame' timestamp='1300243893' post='2221052'] Please do! We are looking forward to it, and please know you are in my thoughts and prayers! [/quote] Gratzie! I really do appreciate any prayers. I'm trying to figure out what I want to discuss tomorrow so I can make a list. I definitely need one because I have mild ADD and am sometimes very forgetful (it runs in the family, I'm afraid). I've been trying to locate a list online of important topics to discuss with spiritual directors, but, so far, no luck. Any help would be most appreciated.
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 I actually thought about some good pointers to discuss: -Why I started discerning in the first place in 2007 -What communities I have already discerned with -Why I applied to Carmel DCJ and left -Discuss my depression and anxiety and the problems I've been facing from religious communities and requirements -Discuss why I stopped discerning in August 2010 and why I started again -Ask about possible spiritual direction I think that is good enough for our first meeting. I'm not even sure we will cover all of it, but at least I have an outline and I'm less likely to forget something than if I just go in there empty handed. I'm planning to go to Mass and Confession in the morning at my Church, so I'll be there twice. I also plan to pray before the Blessed Sacrament before I go to the meeting. I'm trying to be level-headed about this--hoping for the best, but expecting that it could be something completely different. Just because I have been thinking about religious life lately does not mean, by any standards, that I am called to it for sure. I'm taking one step at a time. It's really weird. I was looking over my old journal entries and posts I've made in years past and I really think I've grown. In fact, I'm rather embarrassed about some of the stuff I wrote about because I was behaving rather immaturely and discerning for petty reasons rather than the way I am now--discerning because I desire to serve the Lord with all my heart. I can only imagine how much I'll continue to grow if I stay faithful to my prayer life and I hope to have a spiritual director soon to help with that.
LaPetiteSoeur Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1300249284' post='2221076'] I actually thought about some good pointers to discuss: -Why I started discerning in the first place in 2007 -What communities I have already discerned with -Why I applied to Carmel DCJ and left -Discuss my depression and anxiety and the problems I've been facing from religious communities and requirements -Discuss why I stopped discerning in August 2010 and why I started again -Ask about possible spiritual direction I think that is good enough for our first meeting. I'm not even sure we will cover all of it, but at least I have an outline and I'm less likely to forget something than if I just go in there empty handed. I'm planning to go to Mass and Confession in the morning at my Church, so I'll be there twice. I also plan to pray before the Blessed Sacrament before I go to the meeting. I'm trying to be level-headed about this--hoping for the best, but expecting that it could be something completely different. Just because I have been thinking about religious life lately does not mean, by any standards, that I am called to it for sure. I'm taking one step at a time. It's really weird. I was looking over my old journal entries and posts I've made in years past and I really think I've grown. In fact, I'm rather embarrassed about some of the stuff I wrote about because I was behaving rather immaturely and discerning for petty reasons rather than the way I am now--discerning because I desire to serve the Lord with all my heart. I can only imagine how much I'll continue to grow if I stay faithful to my prayer life and I hope to have a spiritual director soon to help with that. [/quote] Those sound like perfect stuff to talk about. We all grow through prayer and discernment, wherever that discernment leads.
franciscanheart Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 Saying a little prayer for you now. I think your meeting is in five minutes.
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 (edited) Thank you all for your prayers. I just got back from our meeting which was about 30 minutes long. I didn't really talk to him much because he was mostly giving me spiritual advice and encouragement, however, I did say that I was interested in the the Religious Sisters of Mercy and he told me good things to do, which was get in contact with the vocation director of the RSMs as soon as possible and get up there for a retreat as soon as possible! He, too, seems to think that God is trying to tell me something and he told me not to ignore it otherwise, I might miss my true vocation. Also, when I asked him who to contact for spiritual direction, he recommended I talk to a religious Sister in our diocese who I've heard of before. She has been recommended to me in the past, but I really wanted a priest before. Now, I'm really thinking about calling her because she seems to be the one with the most experience and information. He did say to contact him if I needed to talk again, but he was too busy to provide regular direction. Please pray for me. Even though I got great advice, I'm still a little confused. I'm hoping all of this will clear up when I talk to the vocation director and/or the recommended spiritual director. One thing I know for sure is that, if I do have a calling to religious life, I'd be really happy because I've felt (ever since I met religious in person for the first time) that it is the most beautiful vocation like heaven on earth. Edited March 16, 2011 by MaterMisericordiae
HopefulBride Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 Will continue to pray for you. About your confusion, if it would make you feel better consider this: When I went to my first ever discernment retreat it was just to go, even on my third convent visit I wasn't sure if God was calling me to Religious. However, I was open to His Divine Will. It is quite obvious that you are open to whatever His Will is for you life, the mere fact that you are open to His Will for you is enough. He will definitely guide you and will unfold His plans for you. You mentioned Jeremiah 29:11 (which also happens to be a favorite verse of mine) just continue to meditate on that verse and all you shall find your happiness in Him. God Bless, HB
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 (edited) [quote name='HopefulBride' timestamp='1300304224' post='2221216'] Will continue to pray for you. About your confusion, if it would make you feel better consider this: When I went to my first ever discernment retreat it was just to go, even on my third convent visit I wasn't sure if God was calling me to Religious. However, I was open to His Divine Will. It is quite obvious that you are open to whatever His Will is for you life, the mere fact that you are open to His Will for you is enough. He will definitely guide you and will unfold His plans for you. You mentioned Jeremiah 29:11 (which also happens to be a favorite verse of mine) just continue to meditate on that verse and all you shall find your happiness in Him. God Bless, HB [/quote] Wow, if I went by first visit, I wouldn't have continued discerning. It was awful because I was so sick. I'll try to remain open to His will as best as I can. Discerning a vocation can really be confusing, but I told the priest today that this desire has been pressing on my heart since I started discerning but I tried to suppress it for several months when I gave up. For some reason, God wants me to look further, and I can only imagine what is in store for me. I don't have all the answers, obviously, but I do know in my heart that what His plan is will be better than anything I can choose for myself. Sometimes we think we know what will make us happy but only God knows for sure. He gives us little clues along the way and we have to remain open otherwise we will miss the important signs. Even if I find out that I have a vocation to something other than religious life, I will have benefited from being in contact with religious. I do so love to be around them, especially the joyful ones. They have a way of lighting up your heart. I want to possess that pure joy myself. I was just looking at the RSM website and I found this quote which speaks volumes to my situation right now (I'm going to write in my journal): [i][b]"Reflection on how difficult obedience is reveals our growth in battling doing what we want, which can be in opposition to doing the Will of God. Yet being a disciple includes a long process of learning to be a servant, completely surrendering oneself to the Lord, to the Will of God, and following that Will increasingly."[/b][/i]--Mother Mary Quentin Sheridan, R.S.M., Superior General Edited March 16, 2011 by MaterMisericordiae
franciscanheart Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 MM, it can be REALLY hard to be without a spiritual director, especially when you really want one and have tried hard to find a good one! I also know how frustrating it can be to not have a priest available to you. Be courageous, be faithful, be strong. God is still present and will show Himself to you in due time. Your true vocation is written on your heart. Quiet time with God our Father can be difficult when all we want is an answer! I know this all too well. Take care to heed his commands and He will not forsake you. My 2x4 came about 12 years after my initial "pull" was recognized. TWELVE YEARS! Be assured of my continued prayers for you, your discernment, and your peace. I love you! p.s. "The depth of our anxiety is a measure of our distance from God." (That was carved into a piece of wood in Honduras. A friend of mine snapped a picture of it so she wouldn't forget. It's never left my mind.)
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='franciscanheart' timestamp='1300306610' post='2221233'] MM, it can be REALLY hard to be without a spiritual director, especially when you really want one and have tried hard to find a good one! I also know how frustrating it can be to not have a priest available to you. Be courageous, be faithful, be strong. God is still present and will show Himself to you in due time. Your true vocation is written on your heart. Quiet time with God our Father can be difficult when all we want is an answer! I know this all too well. Take care to heed his commands and He will not forsake you. My 2x4 came about 12 years after my initial "pull" was recognized. TWELVE YEARS! Be assured of my continued prayers for you, your discernment, and your peace. I love you! [/quote] I feel rather envious of those who have more resources in their diocese than mine. Mine seems to focus only on helping men become priests. Spiritual directors are extremely hard to find! Even the Sister that Father recommended today is difficult to contact because her information on the diocesan website is out-of-date. They still have her information from when she was working at a Church, but she's retired now. I see her email address, so I'm going to try to get in touch with her that way, but I don't know how much luck I'll have. I also mentioned to Father in our meeting how I think it would really benefit to have a group for those who are discerning vocations. He actually has planned to form one, but he hasn't hashed out the details yet. I'd love to be a part of one if it is made. I believe fellowship amongst discerners is SO important! Franciscanheart, what you wrote helps. Sometimes I forget that I need to stop worrying so much and just trust God to lead the way rather than busily trying to find the answers when he isn't ready to give them yet. I have a tendency to get ahead of myself. Before, I thought I didn't need a spiritual director and now I don't see how I could be without one. They are so valuable, like gold. But I have been reading about what St. Teresa of Avila said that it is better to be without a spiritual director than one that is not faithful to the Church. I will be praying extra hard for God to lead me to the right one. Thanks again.
franciscanheart Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='MaterMisericordiae' timestamp='1300307028' post='2221236'] I feel rather envious of those who have more resources in their diocese than mine. Mine seems to focus only on helping men become priests. Spiritual directors are extremely hard to find! Even the Sister that Father recommended today is difficult to contact because her information on the diocesan website is out-of-date. They still have her information from when she was working at a Church, but she's retired now. I see her email address, so I'm going to try to get in touch with her that way, but I don't know how much luck I'll have. I also mentioned to Father in our meeting how I think it would really benefit to have a group for those who are discerning vocations. He actually has planned to form one, but he hasn't hashed out the details yet. I'd love to be a part of one if it is made. I believe fellowship amongst discerners is SO important! Franciscanheart, what you wrote helps. Sometimes I forget that I need to stop worrying so much and just trust God to lead the way rather than busily trying to find the answers when he isn't ready to give them yet. I have a tendency to get ahead of myself. Before, I thought I didn't need a spiritual director and now I don't see how I could be without one. They are so valuable, like gold. But I have been reading about what St. Teresa of Avila said that it is better to be without a spiritual director than one that is not faithful to the Church. I will be praying extra hard for God to lead me to the right one. Thanks again. [/quote] I can understand your frustration. I live in pretty large diocese; you would think there would be more easily accessible resources for women than there are. Even for me, finding the right resources took time and patience. I found my SD through a PHATMASSER who doesn't even hail from my diocese! Yeah. Haha! Squeezes!
OnlySunshine Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 [quote name='franciscanheart' timestamp='1300307292' post='2221237'] I can understand your frustration. I live in pretty large diocese; you would think there would be more easily accessible resources for women than there are. Even for me, finding the right resources took time and patience. I found my SD through a PHATMASSER who doesn't even hail from my diocese! Yeah. Haha! Squeezes! [/quote] LOL! Sometimes I wonder if it would be better to have contact with someone who is not in my diocese as a long-distance spiritual director. One of the priests I was in contact mentioned this idea to me and said that his was 2 hours away at one point. The only problem is, I have no idea who to contact.
MargaretTeresa Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 Continuing to pray for you! Very excited about how you meeting went. [img]http://www.phatmass.com/phorum/public/style_emoticons/default/clap2.gif[/img] Hope to get to talk to my pastor about spiritual directors soon!
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