The Beauty Of Silence

[Indwelling Trinity]

One of the things that struck me in reading everyone's posts on the subject is how intimately intertwined silence is with prayer.
To know profound prayer is to be friends with profound silence and visa versa. "And the Father spoke only one word and that was His Son..." the rest is silence.

Speaking only for myself it is in that silence that i come to know pure presence and the profundity of a prayer that transcends words or even conscious thought.. .I am not speaking of Quietism and passivity but rather times of interior stillness which perceptually to me is a very high form of activity. in the soul; where the soul is still and openly receptive to God's work in it.

This has zero to do with worthiness, skill, astuteness or holiness. Rather, it is a free gift of God that he gives to even his poorest and most broken of children. A simple yet profound undeserved gift of his love for as long as he chooses to give it.... I know in the depths of my heart that i am foremost, one of His crippled children and of myself can do nothing that is good without his grace.

What i have to abandon myself to is what Mother Teresa used to teach us when i was a young missionary before i entered Carmel.. and that was,.. "to give whatever he takes and take whatever He gives with a big smile." Most often I may give what he asks or take what he gives, but minus the smile, that joy of heart that looks not to itself but to Other.

What Mother said is easy to say but not so easy to practice... But if i can truly learn this simple lesson then consolation or desolation or state in life matter not, for my heart will know the profound peace of living in His will, and no matter what my life may look like on the outside, whether it be success or a total shambles to myself and others, in living in His will habitually, i will in time come to know union with Him even if it be only at my very last breath. It is the desire for that union in my heart that keeps me going despite whatever setbacks i encounter in life. Yes i falter and often, but this desire in my heart persists in making me get up and begin again each and every moment.

For, i know if i learn these simple lessons, then at that point... the string that tied that tiny bird down from flying as OHF St. John said,, will have been broken and my soul will find It's home and infinite beatitude in His Will. And then as Blessed Elizabeth of the Trinity said...(laughing my favorite St. as if anybody here did not know!) My life will become what i so long for it to be...:A perfect praise of His Glory!" That is one continual prayer, a life lost in prayer, living in the presence and silent adoration of an all loving Trinity.

You might all say I am a dreamer.. and you are right.... But i believe one first has to dream dreams... and then work to make them become a reality. To be willing to pay the price for what one longs for.... for me the price is ultimate surrender to God's will.... and God's will can only be understood in the silence of a listening heart.

Habits, rules, structure, etc... are all only a preliminary mean to an end.... we all must grow beyond the externals of religious life as helpful as they may be... and dig deeper finding our true identity not in the externals but in the profundity and quality of our life with the God who dwells within... for as scripture says... where your treasure lies... there will your heart be....

[AccountDeleted]

Good to see you posting here again I.T.!

[Indwelling Trinity]

TY nunsense... I often hesitate... but sometimes my heart gets too full... crazy huh? Good to hear from you too!

[vee]

The beauty of silence, or song, or sound, or anything is that in it God can whisper "I love you!"

[Indwelling Trinity]

Amen ! Vee!

[Guest hermanita]

[quote name='vee8' timestamp='1325825561' post='2363862']
The beauty of silence, or song, or sound, or anything is that in it God can whisper "I love you!"
[/quote]

Not to hijack but I love your Avatar. Brother Andre is one of my favorites. Im love him! Back to thread : Also totally relish this comment.

[inperpetuity]

Silence, since my first post was kind of off topic, I will say something about it now. I love it, have always loved it, am always seeking it, but it is rare to find for any length of time. I live in the city, and our parish church is in a very loud neighboorhood. I must often practice interior silence without the aid of any physical silence. Hard, but possible.

[jruss]

You might all say I am a dreamer.. and you are right.... But i believe one first has to dream dreams... and then work to make them become a reality. To be willing to pay the price for what one longs for.... for me the price is ultimate surrender to God's will.... and God's will can only be understood in the silence of a listening heart.

Sister,
I think it is so odd, in a way, that whatever you say echos deeply within me. My life is so different than yours, with 6 kids-- some being very needy and you a hermit. Does that make my soul Carmelite?

I tell myself that we will ALL reach transforming union eventually in heaven, so why not submit fully to the purifying fire now?

[Indwelling Trinity]

[quote name='jruss' timestamp='1325968733' post='2364564']
You might all say I am a dreamer.. and you are right.... But i believe one first has to dream dreams... and then work to make them become a reality. To be willing to pay the price for what one longs for.... for me the price is ultimate surrender to God's will.... and God's will can only be understood in the silence of a listening heart.

Sister,
I think it is so odd, in a way, that whatever you say echos deeply within me. My life is so different than yours, with 6 kids-- some being very needy and you a hermit. Does that make my soul Carmelite?

I tell myself that we will ALL reach transforming union eventually in heaven, so why not submit fully to the purifying fire now?
[/quote]


Smiles gently.. Good to talk to you again my friend... i have not forgotten you, your family (especially your youngest), nor our talks....

What you say is very true.... Transforrming union is not the sole proprietary right of Carmelites or contemplatives. We are all called to this by our very vocation as Christians, as Sons and Daughters of God. But each of us can only come to that union by living as best we can the vocation God has called us too, whether it be Marriage,Holy Orders, religious life, single, lay or secular life. What is most important is not what title we have or what initials before or after our name... but rather if we are seeking to live in His will. A Mother will touch lives in her care in a profound way that a religious never and visa versa.

Sometimes i think we miss the true import of the story of Martha and Mary. It is not a case of Jesus preferring one over the other, Both are needed. Rather, it is a lesson in priorities for in a sense Martha and Mary are one. What Jesus is telling us is to attend to our contemplative prayerful attention to God and then once dong so we may in peace carry out the duties of Martha without the feeling of resentment and agitation that Martha felt because she had not first rooted her attention on God as her primary focus.

We all know the Jesus spent the majority of His life in relative silence growing in grace and wisdom. And even during his active ministry he often drew away to be alone with His father , even as he had pity on the crowds. Jesus is the son of God but he is also the perfect balance and image of man. He shows us what we are called to be before the Father. It is His life in its entirety we are called to imitate. from the cradle to the cross onto the resurrection.

The active is not excused from prayer and contemplation just as the contemplative is not excused from works of charity. The emphasis and how it is expressed may vary according to each individual vocation but practicing both is inherent to both vocations. ( I will not go into the differences between acquired and infused contemplation, the latter which is soley a gift of the Holy Spirit.)

The true contemplative is not one who is in Hate with the world, To enter solitude in this way to me is a form of misanthrope devoid of all grace. The true contemplative goes into the desert (whether it be physical, interior or both) out of love; Love for God and love for the world, for she realized that all creation touched by his hand is holy and as such wills to give herself as He did for the ransom of many thus sharing in his salvific mission. Just as the priest offers Jesus and all of us to the Father during the sacrifice of the mass, so too does the contemplative soul offer his or her life in imitation and in union with her Beloved. To do this in a real way is to choose to hang on the other side of the cross with Jesus. Something not lightly taken on. She actively seeks that union with God as her sole purpose.actively lifting all up to God by her prayers penances sacrifices and deep love. for in so much as the contemplative prays so to does the whole world pray for her prayer lies at the very heart of the church

But Just as Jesus had to endure the passion and cross before there could be resurrection and redemption won for us; so too must the soul endure the purifying fire of God in order to approach and attain that intimate union with God. Whether it be here or in the next life we all need to go through it .

To choose to step into that fire is a very scary thing. If one chooses to do so, it is most likely because they have tasted The consolations of God in some way and even if only for a very brief period, the experience of that beauty is so overwhelming that she hungers for more, for her soul has been smitten by Love. In time, so great is this desire to possess God that she becomes willing to pass through any fire in order to possess Him so great is her thirst. But also growing deep inside her is the desire to be identified with every movement of the beloved, to imitate His life from the cradle to the grave onto the resurrection and beatific vision of God. And so aided by grace the soul seeks to enter that fire even as human nature recoils from it. Once touched by this grace it is almost impossible to go back to where one was before. Oh me.. the desire to run from the pain is surely there, to run from that feeling that all is lost, that God has abandoned it. It sees how often it falters, and falls and sheds bitter tears even as it struggles to be free.It feels as if it is going backwards rather than forward... It no longer understands what God is doing and can no longer perceive God either on an emotional or intellectual level. It is aware of some action but it knows not what. Finally it pray only to stay still under his hand and to hold on if only by a single thread to its resolve and His will. There are no words for this state. If Not for faith in God's Word and His mercy I truly think it is a foretaste of hell. Perhaps what it deserves.... Only God's grace and the desire for His Love keeps it intact. Yes, a fearsome place to be. hmmm... off topic again...

As for spiritualitiy is concerned... I do not think any one spirituality is better than the other for all lead to union with God. Some how i don't think God is quite as concerned about how we come to Him as long as we come. Some of us find our path directly and others of us go from one state of life to another. Again what is important is that we are in God's will. Just because we believe we are in God's will does not necessarily mean that we actually are.. but i think God accepts even our desire to desire to please Him as Thomas Merton once said. If Carmelite spirituality speaks to your heart and gives you light and peace then i would say go with that if you are unsure, Then a spiritual director would be very helpful at that point if not before.

To me ones spirituality is a combination of personality and how one relates to and perceives God and the world along with the promptings of grace. I fully Intended to be a Missionary of Charity for my entire life however during my years there God through Mother Teresa nurtured my call to Carmel. I think the vocation to Carmel was always there in it's seed form from birth; but in order for that seed to take root it had to first be nurtured... the MC;s was where that tiny seed was ultimately nurtured. Through Mother i had been given a sound faith and value system that was lacking in my religious upbringing. until finally in God;'s time, Mother encouraged me in my desire to transfer to Carmel. So i do not see enetring the MC's or leaving them as a mistake but rather as a preparation for my next step along my spiritual path to God. When i entered Carmel i never expected to be a Carmelite hermit down the road... I loved the communal life of the OCD's.. but again God had different plans.. and now i know i could never go back to the OCD way of life...It would be too stifling for me. I no longer feel the need for such an intense communal life a beautiful as it may be. After having Tasted life at the hermitage, i was forever changed.

I guess what i am saying is that the spiritual life is not static and just because we enter different phases of life, it does not mean that our previous choices were a mistake. Spiritual life is and should be a dynamic process unto our last breath whether it be in the same community for life, or a progression for it is a call to constant conversion towards God.

Again the most important thing is to constantly seek God's will with all our hearts... then i believe God knowing the sincerity of our hearts will add the rest and in the end whether we are privileged to experience some level of union here on earth or have to wait until we reach the other side in order to find that perfect union with Him, the journey will not have been in vain... For in the end It is our Love that counts most and not our perceived successes. for what may seem as failure in our eyes and in the eyes of others may in fact be in God's eyes the accomplishment of his Loving will.

I guess we will only see the top side of his tapestry in eternity and together we will be in awe of what great things he as done with so many little and oft seemingly broken threads in our lives.

Remember, it is a lifetime process... at least i know i will never be bored!


I hope this was of some help.... if not, just toss it out the window! Now back to our program!

[Indwelling Trinity]

Thinking... really only personal experience can tell us what spirituality truly fits us best because it is something so intimate between the soul and God. A spiritual director may point one in a certain direction but ultimately only we can say from lived experience with God if a certain spirituality is right for us even if others think otherwise... I think one way to judge this is by the fruits it bears in one's life and in the life of those around us and that is where a good spiritual director can help us discern.

I mean i could think....gee i make a wonderful Carmelite or Dominican or Franciscan etc..... but if i am neglecting my primary responsibilities or making others around me miserable ... there is good reason to question how honest i am being or if i am seeking a certain spirituality for the right reasons.... A sound spiritual director can give us a good impartial reality check.

Any one any thoughts on this?

[jruss]

[i]Wow, thanks for providing me with about a year's worth of food for meditation! [/i]

[i]I like especially the parts about combining the life of Mary/Martha and active/contemplative. I am not sure exactly what God is doing because He has given me such an intense family life, but also such a hunger and need for prayer. But though there is tension between the 2 at times, it usually happens that they both complement and feed one another. My family life increases my desire for prayer while my prayer increases my desire to offer every moment of my "active" life more in accordance with His grace. . . to live and act from that place of silent union He has shown me in prayer. And then living with the struggles of those around me seems to make me a better conduit of God's grace while in prayer. It is all like a continuous cycle, No?[/i]

[Indwelling Trinity]

Yes... just are there are many season in a year and each year the cycle continues, so too do we revisit various seasons in our spiritual life, hopefully each time on a deeper level.

Sorry if my last post was too long...