Building A Strong Interior Life?

[VeniJesuAmorMi]

Praised be Jesus Christ!

Well, very thankfully I was able to meet with Father today concerning my vocation ...I had a few very important questions regarding my situation which have been clarified. It has been advised that I wait another 2-3 months before contacting the community I'm interested in. I did think that only 3 months was way too soon to start contacting a community considering that I have only been gone from my previous community for 3 months, and I want to do this right this time and be prudent, and also patient! Both my previous Reverend Mother and Father that I'm talking to now have suggested my waiting a while to enter anywhere to have a stronger interior life. Father made a great recommendation of meditating before Our Lord on the vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience. So I thought I would ask if others here could say what they do for growing in their interior life and for maintaining that, especially while still in the world, preparing for the religious life.

Edited July 2, 2012 by VeniJesuAmorMi

[Lisa]

[list]
[*]Eucharistic Adoration
[*]Daily Mass - really, Eucharist and Confession are sacraments you might want to avail yourself of as often as possible...I should go to Confession more often!
[*]Some sembalence of a set prayer schedule- I try to do Lauds, Vespers, and Compline, as well as pray a daily rosary and divine mercy chaplet. These are measurable, but it's also important to have quiet time and prayer from the heart; that's harder to measure. Your priest's suggestion about meditating on the vows is great! I'm going to have to use that!
[*]The Total Consecration to Jesus through Mary really transformed my heart and helped me see things through her motherly love.
[/list]

[filius_angelorum]

Ditto on Mass, Liturgy of the Hours, and the consecration. If you want to make your consecration on Assumption, the date to start is July 13! Meditation in the morning or evening for at least 20 minutes.

There are two fine books that really beefed up my daily meditation: Searching for and Maintaining Peace, by Jacque Philippe, and Prayer of Love and Silence, by a Carthusian. I suggest them to everybody.

Anyway, that's what I have been doing. But my Postulancy starts Wednesday (AGHHHH!!!!), and so I am about to see how much good it has done.

[PhuturePriest]

My two ways are 1) keeping a prayer schedule and 2) making my life here my community and 3) the sacraments. I pray an hour a day minimum unless I have some justifiable reason for not praying the full hour, and I am about to start doing the Liturgy of the Hours. I would not recommend trying to pray an hour right off the bat if you do not pray that much, though. You must work your way up. When I started I prayed about fifteen minutes a day, and I gradually raised the time by adding more daily devotions and getting more prayer books. When it comes to making my current life a community of its own, I basically try to live a disciplined life with a schedule. The sacraments are covered pretty well above so I do not feel as if I must add much there, but I will say confession is one of the most important things. Confession is my favorite sacrament. I spent about ten hours in the confessional the last four months of the previous year. I do not recommend taking as long as I did because that is scrupulosity (Something I finally weeded out of my system at the beginning of this year), but it did make me grow very close to the sacrament. I had an endless list of terrible sexual sins to confess that seemed to never end, but I found Jesus' mercy and love in confession, so it is definitely one I hold dear.

[VeniJesuAmorMi]

This is all great advice. I'm very thankful!

I do go to daily Mass because there is a church close to where I live so I'm able to walk there. I should spend more time there in prayer outside of Mass. In the Monastery I did go to Confession once a week; I need to go more often now that I'm in the world and discerning again. A schedule would be great, as communities have a set schedule (I should have started that a while ago.) I thought also that Father's recommendation about meditation on the vows was great; especially the poverty, chastity, and obedience of the heart that is needed, and not just the exterior. I have found that this is very important, Also, that it's very wise to have someone help and not to go about this yourself. I see now that its not really an option, but that it is needed.

[Mary's Margaret]

As with the others above: regular prayer life including LOTH and Divine Mercy, daily mass, regular confession, Adoration, Consecreation (both to the Sacred Heart and to Jesus through Mary), as well as spiritual reading such as The Hermitage Within, The Message of Therese of Lisieux and works by St. Teresa of Avila and John of the Cross.

However, aside from daily mass and Adoration, what has been most beneficial to my inner life has been simply sitting in silence, at home or before the Blessed Sacrement, lifting my heart to God and allowing Him to love me.

I just finished a month of solitary retreat before which my SD advised me not to think too much and not to fill it with too many 'devotions', but to simply be with God and allow the rhythm of our relationship to emerge. And it did...with much deeper and richer prayer from heart to heart. Best spiritual advice I've ever had.

Prayers for your journey.

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='Mary's Margaret' timestamp='1341276563' post='2451710']
As with the others above: regular prayer life including LOTH and Divine Mercy, daily mass, regular confession, Adoration, Consecreation (both to the Sacred Heart and to Jesus through Mary), as well as spiritual reading such as The Hermitage Within, The Message of Therese of Lisieux and works by St. Teresa of Avila and John of the Cross.

However, aside from daily mass and Adoration, what has been most beneficial to my inner life has been simply sitting in silence, at home or before the Blessed Sacrement, lifting my heart to God and allowing Him to love me.

I just finished a month of solitary retreat before which my SD advised me not to think too much and not to fill it with too many 'devotions', but to simply be with God and allow the rhythm of our relationship to emerge. And it did...with much deeper and richer prayer from heart to heart. Best spiritual advice I've ever had.

Prayers for your journey.
[/quote]

I'm honestly not sure I could do that. There is always something going on in my head. I can't stop thinking. I'm very quiet in real life, but my mind itself is very active. I would worry that I would either mess up and think about stuff the whole time or I would fall asleep.

[Antigonos]

[quote name='FuturePriest387' timestamp='1341268103' post='2451645']
. I will say confession is one of the most important things. Confession is my favorite sacrament. I spent about ten hours in the confessional the last four months of the previous year. I do not recommend taking as long as I did because that is scrupulosity (Something I finally weeded out of my system at the beginning of this year), but it did make me grow very close to the sacrament. I had an endless list of terrible sexual sins to confess that seemed to never end, but I found Jesus' mercy and love in confession, so it is definitely one I hold dear.
[/quote]

Sorry, but when I read an almost 16 year old boy write about "terrible sexual sins" I feel uneasy. Ever think you might just be [b][i]normal [/i][/b]for your age? And that raises the question of whether your discernment is really a way of running away from the topic, since a religious life requires chastity? Have you discussed this with your SD?

I'm not too happy about confession being your favorite sacrament, either. While I, theologically speaking, do not understand the attraction of the Eucharist, it would seem that that would be the most important sacrament to someone contemplating religious life. Do others here feel that confession is more important, too?

[Spem in alium]

I echo a lot of what has been said above: Mass and the Sacraments as often as you can, nurturing a rich prayer life. The greatest times of prayer for me come in Adoration, Benediction and group prayer of the Rosary.

What also helps me is making time for silence and reflection. I like to set some time just to think and to write in a journal. Journalling is by no means for everybody, but I find that when I write, a lot of things I hadn't acknowledged or begun to think about make themselves known.


[quote name='Antigonos' timestamp='1341304267' post='2451870'] Do others here feel that confession is more important, too?
[/quote]

I do not. Reconciliation is a beautiful gift of grace, just as all other Sacraments are.
People connect with Sacraments on different levels. Some people rarely confess, while others will do so regularly and will see it as the most important Sacrament. Some people think very little about or don't understand the Eucharist, while for others it is the focal point of Mass and of life. For me the Eucharist is the greatest Sacrament. While [i]importance [/i]does not bear the same meaning as [i]preference, [/i]and while I can accept that each person is different in their thinking, tendencies and attractions, I do believe the Eucharist should be revered as the greatest Sacrament and the summit of all worship. It is in the Eucharist that Christ reveals himself most completely. It is where he is. All other Sacraments lead to or flow from this point.

St. Thomas Aquinas explains it brilliantly in the [i]Summa Theologica:[/i]

[quote name='St. Thomas Aquinas'] [font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)]Absolutely speaking, the sacrament of the Eucharist is the greatest of all the sacraments: and this may be shown in three ways. First of all because it contains Christ Himself substantially: whereas the other sacraments contain a certain instrumental power which is a share of Christ's power, as we have shown above ([/background][/size][/font][url="http://m.ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa.TP_Q62_A4.html"]Q[62], A[4][/url][font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)], ad 3, A[5] ). Now that which is essentially such is always of more account than that which is such by participation.[/background][/size][/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)]Secondly, this is made clear by considering the relation of the sacraments to one another. For all the other sacraments seem to be ordained to this one as to their end. For it is manifest that the sacrament of order is ordained to the consecration of the Eucharist: and the sacrament of Baptism to the reception of the Eucharist: while a man is perfected by Confirmation, so as not to fear to abstain from this sacrament. By Penance and Extreme Unction man is prepared to receive the Body of Christ worthily. And Matrimony at least in its signification, touches this sacrament; in so far as it signifies the union of Christ with the Church, of which union the Eucharist is a figure: hence the Apostle says ([url="http://m.ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa.TP_Q65_A3.html?device=mobile"]Eph. 5:32[/url]): "This is a great sacrament: but I speak in Christ and in the Church."[/background][/size][/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)]Thirdly, this is made clear by considering the rites of the sacraments. For nearly all the sacraments terminate in the Eucharist, as Dionysius says (Eccl. Hier. iii): thus those who have been ordained receive Holy Communion, as also do those who have been baptized, if they be adults.[/background][/size][/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)]The remaining sacraments may be compared to one another in several ways. For on the ground of necessity, Baptism is the greatest of the sacraments; while from the point of view of perfection, order comes first; while Confirmation holds a middle place. The sacraments of Penance and Extreme Unction are on a degree inferior to those mentioned above; because, as stated above [/background][/size][/font][url="http://m.ccel.org/ccel/aquinas/summa.TP_Q65_A2.html"](A[2])[/url][font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)], they are ordained to the Christian life, not directly, but accidentally, as it were, that is to say, as remedies against supervening defects. And among these, Extreme Unction is compared to Penance, as Confirmation to Baptism; in such a way, that Penance is more necessary, whereas Extreme Unction is more perfect.[/background][/size][/font][font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=5][background=rgb(239, 239, 239)][/quote][/background][/size][/font]

Edited July 3, 2012 by Spem in alium

[Lisa]

Great explanation, Spem!

[filius_angelorum]

Confession is very important to some, regardless of its objective nature. Sure, we are not supposed to need confession, but if we do need it, then it becomes essential. The grace, moreover, poured out in confession is so marvelous that it is perfectly understandable that a person should be moved thereby to a great love for this sacrament. And that is all for the best. I believe Pope John Paul II went to confession almost every day, and recommended regular, frequent confession. So there.

As for its role in discernment, I know that without confession I would have never moved forward in discerning my vocation. Making a vow of chastity is a TOUGH decision, and a number of temptations arise therefrom. Part of the grace of the sacrament is that it helps strengthen one's life of virtue and avoid sin in the future. Definitely this is an important component of any future vocation in the Church.

And don't underestimate a boy's need for conversion. Trust me. I heard about more dissipation and depravity from 16 year-old boys in high school than I ever did in college. Goodness gracious, the talk that used to go on in the bus! Also, it's not your soul, Antigonos, that FuturePriest is trying to save, so let him worry about which sacrament is his favorite....Many great saints have made it to heaven for their work in the confessional. So no more of this "I'm not so happy..." business.

[Antigonos]

[quote name='filius_angelorum' timestamp='1341318064' post='2451894']
Also, it's not your soul, Antigonos, that FuturePriest is trying to save, so let him worry about which sacrament is his favorite....Many great saints have made it to heaven for their work in the confessional. So no more of this "I'm not so happy..." business.
[/quote]

I am somewhat in a quandary as to how to answer this. I was surprised, that's all, that he should choose that sacrament. Miles has made previous statements that indicate to me that he has unresolved sexual issues which he finds troubling. All I wanted to say is that, at his age, that's perfectly normal. I not only have two daughters, I have a 32 year old son, and I remember his adolescence very well.

The Catholic Church is wrestling today with the phenomenon [which is probably nothing new, btw; the publicity is new] of priests who thought vows of chastity or celibacy would resolve their deep-seated sexual problems, but didn't. The Church today is much more aware of this than in the past, yet it persists. Miles gives the impression, perhaps I'm wrong, that he's distressed more than he should be by real or imaginary incidents in his past, and possible present. For an adolescent to talk dirty, think dirty, and [hopefully not!] act dirty is regrettable but certainly not extraordinary; for an adolescent to feel such guilt that endless confession is the only relief is, IMO, not. And I bet his SD would say the same thing.

I accept that occasionally --very occasionally -- someone can really discern a vocation when very young. I knew I would be a nurse by age 14. But the reality of nursing was very, very different than my mental picture of the profession, and of course, nursing is not something that one does 24/7* for the rest of one's life, nor does it preclude a normal sex life, marriage and children.

Miles needs to continue with his SD, finish high school, begin college, live as normal a life as he can. Then, at maturity, he will make an informed decision about what to do with it. Self-knowledge is essential to success in just about everything.

*Marriage and raising children, OTOH, is a 24/7 job that never ends.

[savvy]

Future Priest,

Antigonos is right here. Don't worry about your discernment too much. You still have time. Another thing is that once you leave your sins in the confessional. They are gone, dead, buried, even in heaven. So this guilt is not a good thing. Focus on the positive, not on the negative. Find productive things to do that will keep you busy.

Is there a good youth group you could join?

[emmaberry]

All the devotions listed are wonderful! Some days I find that I am just lagging, and I try to get in a daily rosary. Hopefully, you have very few of these, but they are days when nothing goes right, and there really is not one spare minute for LofHrs or adoration or anything. On these days, I find great comfort in Mary and the fact that she will keep me close to her son Jesus.

[quote name='Antigonos' timestamp='1341332842' post='2451991']
I am somewhat in a quandary as to how to answer this. I was surprised, that's all, that he should choose that sacrament. Miles has made previous statements that indicate to me that he has unresolved sexual issues which he finds troubling. All I wanted to say is that, at his age, that's perfectly normal. I not only have two daughters, I have a 32 year old son, and I remember his adolescence very well.

The Catholic Church is wrestling today with the phenomenon [which is probably nothing new, btw; the publicity is new] of priests who thought vows of chastity or celibacy would resolve their deep-seated sexual problems, but didn't. The Church today is much more aware of this than in the past, yet it persists. Miles gives the impression, perhaps I'm wrong, that he's distressed more than he should be by real or imaginary incidents in his past, and possible present. For an adolescent to talk dirty, think dirty, and [hopefully not!] act dirty is regrettable but certainly not extraordinary; for an adolescent to feel such guilt that endless confession is the only relief is, IMO, not. And I bet his SD would say the same thing.

I accept that occasionally --very occasionally -- someone can really discern a vocation when very young. I knew I would be a nurse by age 14. But the reality of nursing was very, very different than my mental picture of the profession, and of course, nursing is not something that one does 24/7* for the rest of one's life, nor does it preclude a normal sex life, marriage and children.

Miles needs to continue with his SD, finish high school, begin college, live as normal a life as he can. Then, at maturity, he will make an informed decision about what to do with it. Self-knowledge is essential to success in just about everything.

*Marriage and raising children, OTOH, is a 24/7 job that never ends.
[/quote]
[quote name='savvy' timestamp='1341337112' post='2452035']
Future Priest,

Antigonos is right here. Don't worry about your discernment too much. You still have time. Another thing is that once you leave your sins in the confessional. They are gone, dead, buried, even in heaven. So this guilt is not a good thing. Focus on the positive, not on the negative. Find productive things to do that will keep you busy.

Is there a good youth group you could join?
[/quote]

If you have all this advice for FP's discernment, feel free to send him a message. As for A's comment that he's focusing too much on those 'terrible' sins-he did say he was recovering from scrupulosity, so he has that part under control. It seems like you are trying to affirm FP in his sins-every 16 year old boy does it, etc-and, while that stems from a caring heart and wanting to encourage others, A, it's not really in his best interest, discernment-wise. People are wanting to join religious life today because Jesus said, "Be perfect as your Heavenly Father is perfect" and they take this very seriously. In [u]An Infinity of Little Hours[/u], Carthusians are depicted confessing their sins in Chapter, many of which are sexual and torment them. Obviously, FP understands Confession, and subsequently knows of Jesus' generous love, mercy, and forgiveness. He is not wrong in saying sexual sins are terrible-they are, though society paints them as 'the norm.' Jerome writes that Origen , along with other well-intentioned Early Christians, cut off their genitals because they read Jesus' words "Some have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom" and "If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off" literally. This is drastic and not something to do today, but they had the right perspective on fleeing from sexual sin.

As for your advice for him to wait awhile to further discern, no one will let him into a religious order at 16. The Church has guidelines for young people who are discerning, and will make sure he is ready before he enters a community. Of course, we have to remember little St Therese entering the Carmelites at 15! We don't know FP's discernment, only he does, although it probably is good advice to wait a bit, as the Church echoes this sentiment too.

[filius_angelorum]

In any case, this thread has been hijacked by a less-than-helpful thread. The only question salient to the discussion is whether or not the sacrament of confession is a precious gift, an important aid in the strengthening of one's spiritual life and vocational discernment. FuturePriest, myself, and many others, including a good many saints and spiritual writers, say yes.

And of course, prayer, mortification, and penance are all part of helping one develop an "interiority" to one's spiritual life. A fast may be distracting at first, but a prolonged fast slowly deprives the body of the kind of sensuality that leads one to sin and away from humility, provided that one is not prideful about the fast itself. I have always thought that the Western tradition tended to under-emphasize this tradition of spiritual authors.