Annie12 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 I have been discerning for 3 years now but I have become really confused latley and need some prayers. I'm pretty depressed about my vocation right now. I don't even know if I'm really called anymore. Prayers please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eagle_eye222001 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 Prayers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie12 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Share Posted July 17, 2012 I'm probably being too dramatic bree but still could use some prayers (thanks eagle eye!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnlySunshine Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 Hun, you are ANYTHING but a failure. I went through periods such as these in my discernment where I was really confused. For me, it meant just taking a break and maturing in my prayer life. Inevitably, after a period of non-discernment, the desire for religious life would return. Take some time "off" and focus your attention totally on God. Forget looking up orders right now. Sometimes our focus becomes so clouded by exteriors that the voice of God becomes drowned out. Do some spiritual reading like "I Believe in Love" or "Abandonment to Divine Providence." Let God take care of the rest. Prayers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie12 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Share Posted July 17, 2012 That's a good idea. I think part of the problem is that I don't feel like I have support from someone who understands. (You all on VS are great Though!) I don't have a spiritual director so its tough because. I tend to keep it all bottled up inside instead of chatting about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mysisterisalittlesister Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 What MM said Many prayers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emmaberry Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 [quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1342560390' post='2456505'] I have been discerning for 3 years now but I have become really confused latley and need some prayers. I'm pretty depressed about my vocation right now. I don't even know if I'm really called anymore. Prayers please. [/quote] You are no failure-you are normal. If you had not had serious doubts this far into your discernment, anyone wise would have told you to watch out, because they're coming! In all seriousness, everyone has doubts. I just finished my application to a community, and I too began to have serious doubts. It happens to people no matter how devout or sure of their vocation they are. Something that encourages me in my doubts and periods of dryness (often these go together) is to remember that Jesus is even more pleased with the works we do for Him in dryness, because we are motivated not by feelings or positive emotions but by pure devotion to Him. Remain close to Him in this hard time and your reward will be greater than all the works combined that you might do while you were in spiritual ecstasy or consolation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutureCarmeliteClaire Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 You are not a failure. Maybe you should take a break from serious discernment for a while if you are seriously overwhelmed. For many reasons, I've decided to put my discernment on hold for a while. I don't know when I'll start back up, at this point, I don't know if I will. At least I need to find out what is wrong with my medical stuff. So, anyway, know that God has a plan, and that I know how you feel right now. If you want to talk, you are welcome to PM me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NovemberFourth Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 [quote name='emmaberry' timestamp='1342571961' post='2456585'] You are no failure-you are normal. If you had not had serious doubts this far into your discernment, anyone wise would have told you to watch out, because they're coming! In all seriousness, everyone has doubts. I just finished my application to a community, and I too began to have serious doubts. It happens to people no matter how devout or sure of their vocation they are. Something that encourages me in my doubts and periods of dryness (often these go together) is to remember that Jesus is even more pleased with the works we do for Him in dryness, because we are motivated not by feelings or positive emotions but by pure devotion to Him. Remain close to Him in this hard time and your reward will be greater than all the works combined that you might do while you were in spiritual ecstasy or consolation. [/quote] This, absolutely this. And occasional periods of doubt won't necessarily stop when someone enters either. And, no, you are 100 per cent not a failure! Hugs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbTherese Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 [quote name='Annie12' timestamp='1342564491' post='2456528'] That's a good idea. I think part of the problem is that I don't feel like I have support from someone who understands. (You all on VS are great Though!) I don't have a spiritual director so its tough because. I tend to keep it all bottled up inside instead of chatting about it. [/quote] You have my prayers too Annie. If you are unable to find a spiritual director, then with all trust and confidence put yourself in The Lord's Hands - He will lead you and always has each of us in His Hands, leading us, be the weather fair, be it foul. I went near on 20 years without being able to find a good director although I sure hope it wont be that long or even near that long for you. One of the gifts He has given you and an expression of His leading you, is that you find Phatmass Phorum supportive and members understanding. There are many members here who are coming from an absolute wealth of experience and all kinds of experiences related to discerning (and living) religious life and in my time here, I am yet to see a person in difficulty not receive much encouragement and support. Feelings are just feelings, its what you do with them that count and feeling down and somewhat despondant is no easy road - but through continuing to have Faith and trust in The Lord though in a very dark patch just now, your Faith and trust will strengthen and grow. Its not difficult to have Faith and trust when the weather is fair, it is when the going gets rough that Faith and trust is strengthened for times of foul weather and difficulties - and they possibly will come at times and probably now and then throughout life. True Faith and trust in The Lord can be just a sort of 'very lonely act' (as it were)of one's will without feelings providing any support at all for such Faith and trust. Strangely, such 'very lonely acts' of one's will, when feelings are no support at all, are the most virtuous of all - but it sure dont feel that way I know. Don't force anything, just tell The Lord you trust Him implicitly (you can talk to Him about exactly how you are feeling and why) and pray daily even if it is simply to share your feelings with Him - and then continue to live your everyday life normally. Remember too that in the lives of our saints there is always suffering of some kind or other either external or internal, or both. I also highly recommend "Abandonment to Divine Providence" which MaterMisericordiae suggested. There is an online text here : [url="http://www.ccel.org/ccel/decaussade/abandonment.iii.html"]http://www.ccel.org/...onment.iii.html[/url] Have you spoken with the vocations director in your diocese - this person may be able to help you find a spiritual director. I will keep your finding a good spiritual director as an intention in prayer. Other people who may be able to either offer spiritual direction or how to find a director would be your parish priest and religious orders of nuns or sisters and also priests and/or brothers. PS You are not [u]in reality[/u] a failure; however I am not going to tell you what you should feel. Feelings are just feelings and we can't dictate to anyone what they should feel or must feel, or should not feel. Feelings tell me in part who I am - but they are not the whole of me and it is what I do with my feelings that is important. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spem in alium Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 Prayers, Annie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cappie Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 We are human and go through phases. Some of these phases are zeal and great love... at other times, however, we forget what we are fighting for or where we want to go. It is these points in time that we must work for Faith.If you have ever been in a large crowd, you know how important it is to keep some landmark or sign in sight in order to stay with the group and not be carried away by the numberless crowd. You can't see the people you are trying to stay with, at times, but you rely on this landmark or sign to lead you to them. So also is faith important to keep one from getting carried away. In the Old Testement this concept appears to be clearly understood. Moses' last words to his followers included "The Lord will go before you and deliver you into the land of your inheritance"... or something like that anyway... but is this not the same faith I am speaking of? The Israelite's knew of the Lord's Promise and through all their trials and blindness allowed Him to be their sight. This is how we must act when our own minds and hearts fail us. The Divine Office is a perpetual prayer, as is the Mass... no matter how many years will pass, the Church must maintain this liturgical year for the safety and security of her flock. By praying in such a structured way, we are walking even when our legs are tied with fear and doubt. We are steadily walking, steadily working, and most importantly steadily making progress with the Lord through these prayers. We do not stop our efforts, even when all motive and hope is covered by a veil. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximillion Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 And on a lighter note............... [color=#000000][font=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=3] [i]The next time you think God can’t use you, remember:[/i][/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=3] [i]Noah was a drunk Abraham was too old Isaac was a daydreamer Jacob was a liar Leah was ugly Joseph was abused Moses was murderer had a [url="http://blog.adw.org/2012/06/if-you-can-use-any-thing-lord-you-can-use-me-a-meditation-on-the-readings-for-the-11th-sunday-of-the-year/#"]stuttering problem[/url] Gideon was afraid Samson had long hair and was a womanizer Rahab was a prostitute Jeremiah and Timothy were too young David had an affair and was a murderer Elijah was suicidal Isaiah preached naked Jonah ran from God Naomi was a widow Job went [url="http://blog.adw.org/2012/06/if-you-can-use-any-thing-lord-you-can-use-me-a-meditation-on-the-readings-for-the-11th-sunday-of-the-year/#"]bankrupt[/url] and depressed Peter denied Christ The Disciples fell asleep while [url="http://blog.adw.org/2012/06/if-you-can-use-any-thing-lord-you-can-use-me-a-meditation-on-the-readings-for-the-11th-sunday-of-the-year/#"]praying[/url] Martha worried about everything The Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once Zaccheus was too small Paul was too religious Timothy had an ulcer. Lazarus was dead![/i][/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][size=3] [i]No excuses then, God chooses the weak and makes them strong[/i][/size][/font][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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