A Mother's View Of Her Son's Vocation

[Luigi]

[url="http://domcentral.org/confessions-of-a-seminarians-mother/"]http://domcentral.org/confessions-of-a-seminarians-mother/[/url]

It's quite good, except there are a [i]number[/i] of typos. sometimes you have to scratch your head while you figure it out.

[emmaberry]

Thanks for posting! Not my favorite 'my son is a priest' blog entry or article, but I appreciated her frank honesty. My favorite person in her essay was her husband! What wise words he had for his wife, and for all of us as well.

[andibc]

Thanks, Luigi, I'll be sending this to a friend whose son is in formation.
Emmaberry, can you send me link(s) to your favorite(s) so that I can share those with her too?

[emmaberry]

[quote name='andibc' timestamp='1347315762' post='2481108']
Emmaberry, can you send me link(s) to your favorite(s) so that I can share those with her too?
[/quote]

The two I remember enjoying (not that I did not enjoy this one, but I found the mother's tone slightly irritating-obviously a problem with me, not her) were from VS. I just did a quick search for them and nothing came up. They were both a Mother's POV of her son's Dominican vocation as well. I will keep looking and update this if I find them!

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='emmaberry' timestamp='1347336369' post='2481216']
The two I remember enjoying (not that I did not enjoy this one, but I found the mother's tone slightly irritating-obviously a problem with me, not her) were from VS. I just did a quick search for them and nothing came up. They were both a Mother's POV of her son's Dominican vocation as well. I will keep looking and update this if I find them!
[/quote]

Eh, she kind of had a whole "I'm not completely okay with it" vibe going on, and that's her problem. Though my problem is I complain too much.

[emmaberry]

[color=#222222][font=Helvetica Neue', Arial, Verdana, sans-serif][size=4][background=rgb(255, 255, 255)][quote name='FuturePriest387' timestamp='1347337648' post='2481222']
Eh, she kind of had a whole "I'm not completely okay with it" vibe going on, and that's her problem. Though my problem is I complain too much.
[/quote]
Yes! I could not find out exactly what bothered me, so I figured it was my reading comprehension. After reading your post, that is exactly what it was! Though, like I said in my first response to the OP, I appreciate her honesty. I wouldn't have wanted her to fake being happy or uber-supportive just because it sounds better. After all her struggle with her son's vocation, I hoped she would say something about the dignity of the priesthood. I didn't re-read her blog entry, but I don't think she ever came to that point.

I think it also bothered me because I would hate it if my parent's felt this way-and my dad does. My mom is very supportive though, for the most part. Reading the mom's feelings made me more depressed about how my dad views my vocation. Every good comment she made about her son's vocation or the religious life was followed by "but I still think he'd be a great husband and dad." I wanted her to fall on one side of the fence or the other, and her balancing (I am supportive but I still want [i]this[/i]) made me uncomfortable...though, again, her honesty is admirable even if her sentiment isn't.[/background][/size][/font][/color]

Edited September 11, 2012 by emmaberry

[PhuturePriest]

[quote name='emmaberry' timestamp='1347337783' post='2481223']

[color=#222222][font=Helvetica Neue', Arial, Verdana, sans-serif][size=4][background=rgb(255, 255, 255)]Yes! I could not find out exactly what bothered me, so I figured it was my reading comprehension. After reading your post, that is exactly what it was! Though, like I said in my first response to the OP, I appreciate her honesty. I wouldn't have wanted her to fake being happy or uber-supportive just because it sounds better. After all her struggle with her son's vocation, I hoped she would say something about the dignity of the priesthood. I didn't re-read her blog entry, but I don't think she ever came to that point.

I think it also bothered me because I would hate it if my parent's felt this way-and my dad does. My mom is very supportive though, for the most part. Reading the mom's feelings made me more depressed about how my dad views my vocation. Every good comment she made about her son's vocation or the religious life was followed by "but I still think he'd be a great husband and dad." I wanted her to fall on one side of the fence or the other, and her balancing (I am supportive but I still want [i]this[/i]) made me uncomfortable...though, again, her honesty is admirable even if her sentiment isn't.[/background][/size][/font][/color]
[/quote]

Of course. Honesty was good, but perhaps a "This is what makes him happy and I know he wouldn't be happier doing anything else" would have been nice to throw in, especially since this is meant to help parents with their children's vocations. Also, a good spell-check would have been nice.

[Luigi]

"To have a son that loves and wants to serve God and His church in such a fully committed way is a beautiful gift."

"I cannot deny my heartfelt dream of seeing this son of ours, happily married, with children. [b]Much stronger, however, is my desire for our son to live the life to which he is called[/b]..."

"Yes, I want two very different things. Life tends to be this way. It is not the first time my desires have been in conflict, and I am certain it will not be the last."

It is entirely possible that the son's vocation is part of the mother's continuing conversion process (she says early on that she is a convert to Catholicism).

The older you get, the more complicated life gets.

[emmaberry]

[quote name='Luigi' timestamp='1347383132' post='2481344']
"To have a son that loves and wants to serve God and His church in such a fully committed way is a beautiful gift."

"I cannot deny my heartfelt dream of seeing this son of ours, happily married, with children. [b]Much stronger, however, is my desire for our son to live the life to which he is called[/b]..."

"Yes, I want two very different things. Life tends to be this way. It is not the first time my desires have been in conflict, and I am certain it will not be the last."

[b]It is entirely possible that the son's vocation is part of the mother's continuing conversion process (she says early on that she is a convert to Catholicism).

The older you get, the more complicated life gets.[/b]
[/quote]

Your comment about age makes sense-I am young so that must be why I didn't immediately identify with or understand the complexities she presented.

[AuthorOfMyLife]

Luigi, thanks for calling attention to this article, and especially to calling attention to the quotes that made her true feelings clear.

I think we should be careful about labeling her feelings as "this is her problem." Yes, it is her challenge. And she knows it. She appears to be doing what she can to overcome this challenge and accept her son's vocation with true peace and joy.

This is my favorite passage in the whole "Confession":

[i]"I do not yet have that sense of peace. But I do have the conviction to support my son in his desire to become a Dominican friar, because this is what he wants. If the Dominicans are to be our son’s new family, I want to get to know them and love them the way I would a daughter-in-law and grandchildren."[/i]

I think we should recognize that this is a wonderful desire to love!

It is true she ends the paragraph with:

[i]"I believe our son could make a wonderful priest. I also believe he could be a wonderful husband and Father." [/i]

But the second sentence does not seem to be a negation of the first sentence. This is just what she believes. And, really, I would think that any young man who can be a wonderful priest could probably also be at least a good father--just because he should be a healthy and well-rounded person who can give his fatherly love to all the people in his care.

Anyway, thanks again, Luigi! God bless all mothers and fathers who are at least trying to support the vocations of their children!

Emmaberry--I'm sorry that your dad is resistant to your own vocation. I'll be praying that he will come to be more accepting.

[cmaD2006]

Actually I read it and I got it. The key is ... of course she's not 100% ok with it -- that's the point of the blog entry. Deep down inside there is always a part of mom/dad who wants to see the grandkids, to see the daughter or son happily married, with a new developing family. With a religious it is not to be, and it is as if "my son/daughter is being taken away from me."

Parents do go through that (I think) even with marriage, but since entering religious life definitely limits contact (although marriage can do the same, it is still different) there is a loss.

It read quite well, and I didn't hear her complaining. I heard her putting into words the "loss" she felt.

[MIKolbe]

to be young and know everything...oh how i miss it.