ChristinaTherese Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 So, a while ago I was on facebook chat with a friend from Spain. I haven't really talked to him often, maybe once every few months, since I met him and spent a week at his house about two years ago. (It made sense, because our parents know each other and his family was hosting me in Barcelona.) As I was leaving chat, since I had to go to orchestra, he implied that he had an extremely longstanding crush on me and I didn't have the presence of mind to tell him that I'm discerning, he's the child of Protestant missionaries in Spain, and there is no romantic relationship going to happen between the two of us unless he becomes Catholic and I stop discerning religious life. So I just left his comment hanging after a bit an incredulous "What??" type of answer, since he hadn't been explicit in the first place, and left for rehearsal. It's been a while, maybe a month or two, but... do you guys think that it's fine to leave it at that until our next contact, or that I should somehow try to convey to him that I'm discerning. (Interestingly, I was talking to him about that a bit over a year ago.... I'm not sure if he remembers, though. And I wasn't as nearly sure, then. And I might have been talking to him about how things were incredibly awkward with another guy, which would have complicated matters in his mind.) So.... What do y'all think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thepiaheart Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 Leave it be, IMO; no need to dramatize & blow up something that has passed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
savvy Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 (edited) Christina, If this guy is still pursuing you, then tell him, that you are seriously discerning. This way, you won't lead him on, only to break the news later. If not, then just don't say anything to him. Edited July 18, 2013 by savvy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benedictus Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 He may think he has made a major mistake by being honest with you and now you've not replied because you've rejected his suggestion or somehow shocked by it. I would personally try and open a general chat with him and see if he raises the issue again or not. If he doesn't then leave it be, but at least the fact you've initiated chat generally indicates you're not seeing his comment as something that's an ongoing problem between you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spem in alium Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 In my view, you should only tell him you're discerning if he makes his feelings for you explicit or brings up the subject again. Good luck with whatever you decide! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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