Help And Prayers, Please!

[Spem in alium]

Recently I experienced a change in my discernment (and truly a change for the better!).

 

Basically, I've been discerning with two different Congregations.My heart is becoming more and more inclined towards one Congregation in terms of my vocation. I was on a retreat with them recently, which really helped me make sense of my feelings and desires. I have been praying since that time and have experienced nothing but joy and peace. My desire would be to start Affiliacy with them soon (ideally by the end of next year).

 

However, I do visit the other Congregation fairly regularly and am very close with the Sisters (one of the Sisters is actually my Spiritual Director, and I talk quite often with another Sister). I was initially not drawn to them vocationally, but over time I became more attracted to their way of life. Yet the peace I feel when considering the first Congregation is on a different level to that brought by these Sisters.

 

I feel like I need to tell the second Congregation of the change in my discernment, especially since they are treating me as a discerner, but I'm not really sure how. Would it be best to talk to my SD? What kind of thing should I say? I've never done this before, so am quite unsure of the steps to take. It's not very urgent that I tell them right away, I just don't want them to feel as though I've led them on or that my feelings are something other that what they truly are.

 

I guess I could also talk to the Vocations Director of the first Congregation (tell her that I'm interested in her Congregation but unsure how to tell the other Sisters) and see what she says. I'm quite friendly with her and she's very open.

 

Any advice would be welcomed, as I'm really clueless. And please pray for me, if you wouldn't mind :)  I am very joyful but still doubtful at times.

 

 

[Gabriela]

I think you have suggested a good way: Tell the VocDir of the community you are interested in that you aren't sure what to say to the other community. Ask her advice. Then, I suspect, she will tell you to simply state your feelings to your SD in the second community. Remember that any religious community worth its salt is going to help you discern where you are TRULY called, rather than simply try to pressure you to join their community. If the woman in the second community is your SD, and you have a good relationship built on trust, then I am sure she will not only understand but also offer her support and encourage you to follow your heart.

 

Best of luck to you! :-)

[Spem in alium]

I think you have suggested a good way: Tell the VocDir of the community you are interested in that you aren't sure what to say to the other community. Ask her advice. Then, I suspect, she will tell you to simply state your feelings to your SD in the second community. Remember that any religious community worth its salt is going to help you discern where you are TRULY called, rather than simply try to pressure you to join their community. If the woman in the second community is your SD, and you have a good relationship built on trust, then I am sure she will not only understand but also offer her support and encourage you to follow your heart.

 

Best of luck to you! :-)

 

Thank you! :) While I love both, I feel there's been a little more pressure with the second congregation - mostly as a result of how I first got in contact with them and the fact that my SD isn't yet aware of my deep discernment with the other congregation (as much of it happened after our last meeting). Plus the average age of the Sisters is quite high, so I know they are looking for younger women to join them. Both congregations have been open and caring though, and they definitely have helped me discern better.

My SD is great and I do trust her. I just don't want them to feel put out, because they've offered me a lot as a discerner with them.