Prayers for Home Situation...

[St.JosephsRose 2]

On 1/28/2021 at 4:14 PM, JHFamily said:

May I ask how old you are? Are you in a position to enter soon? If not, I would start living my social and family life as if I had forgotten about religious life, but live it more deliberately as if you are certain of your (now secret) vocation.

I'm not sure if I understood this right, so please correct me if I did. From the sound of it, you're telling her to live a double life in a way? Take away all the attention from her vocation to the outside world, but continue to live it completely in secret. I don't believe this is healthy. My spiritual director told me that living a double life can cause deep wounds that will take a while to heal. When you know where God wants you, the only peace you will find is following that path, and when you're trying to seem like you aren't following that path to the people closest to you it causes you to lose peace and keeps you on gaurd at all times.

 

PaxCordis, my heart is with you during this trying time in your life and I will be praying for you ❤️ Remember that God has a reason for everything, and that he's giving this situation to strengthen you and bring you closer to him!

 

God Bless!

[JHFamily 202]

23 hours ago, St.JosephsRose said:

My spiritual director told me that living a double life can cause deep wounds that will take a while to heal. When you know where God wants you, the only peace you will find is following that path, and when you're trying to seem like you aren't following that path to the people closest to you it causes you to lose peace and keeps you on gaurd at all times.

This is a great point. This writer is still is school and is not yet able to follow his/her vocation. What I suggest is to quit talking about the vocation and focusing on doing your daily duty and growing in virtue. Grow in holiness. All of us are called to do this, no matter what situation we are in, including the person entering next week. I do not think that would constitute a double life. Then, if the talking about the vocation stops, the harassment may stop, at least until that time when entering is imminent.  

[gloriana35 107]

I agree with JH. This is not about living a double life at all - which indeed is problematic. It is about being discreet, when revealing a vocational path that is well in the future is leading to harassment from others. 

I do not see 'discussing boundaries' as being likely to have a positive outcome. It might lead to further mockery. In my younger days, I found that even a polite 'I do not care to discuss this' led to laughter and mimicry. (... trust me, I survived.. though it surely is divine providence that I didn't stick anyone's nose in his ear and have him blow his brains out.) 

It is wiser to focus on developing a prayer life, being open to guidance from a director (or others knowledgeable in the religious life), and working towards removing the distractions from love of God and neighbour than to have a circular argument. Be patient - you know who you are (...though we keep learning more about that till the day we die... perhaps even beyond), and your ability to pursue your religious vocation is not that far off. 

Though I cannot find the source, a Franciscan friar told me, many years ago, that Francis of Assisi often prayed, "Lord, who are you? Lord, who am I?" Had I a son who was giving away priceless silks from China (and this during the wars of the 13th century) from my shop, I'd have thought he was crackers, no less than Pietro Bernadone.

[RosaMystica 13]

4 hours ago, JHFamily said:

This is a great point. This writer is still is school and is not yet able to follow his/her vocation. What I suggest is to quit talking about the vocation and focusing on doing your daily duty and growing in virtue. Grow in holiness. All of us are called to do this, no matter what situation we are in, including the person entering next week. I do not think that would constitute a double life. Then, if the talking about the vocation stops, the harassment may stop, at least until that time when entering is imminent.  

Good advice

[St.JosephsRose 2]

On 2/22/2021 at 9:00 AM, JHFamily said:

This is a great point. This writer is still is school and is not yet able to follow his/her vocation. What I suggest is to quit talking about the vocation and focusing on doing your daily duty and growing in virtue. Grow in holiness. All of us are called to do this, no matter what situation we are in, including the person entering next week. I do not think that would constitute a double life. Then, if the talking about the vocation stops, the harassment may stop, at least until that time when entering is imminent.  

Oh, I see now. I do completely agree. Thank you for clarifying!