Repost on "Mature Discerners"

[Amyprs12]

5 hours ago, nikita92 said:

I would like to remind everyone, that this is a repost of a old post from back in 2013. I am not the author of it! 

This is a clear example of ageism, of micro-aggression that everyone seems to be condoning as okay.  The only reason this 2013 should be reposted is to say that it is wrong.  It is not an example of following Christ.  Instead, it seems to be used to justify the ugliness of pride among those who supposedly desire to imitate Jesus and Mary.  Don’t spread evilness @nikita92 Older women endure enough discrimination already!  Why spread more out of pride? To feel knowledgeable and respected? Seek humility and not awe from others.

[nikita92]

Amy- You are entitled to post your perspective; just as I am entitled to repost what I wish. You are judging me on something I have not even personally commented on myself. By the way...for your information..I will be turning 64 next month! 0;->

[Ash Wednesday]

On 11/30/2021 at 3:21 AM, Amyprs12 said:

This is a clear example of ageism, of micro-aggression that everyone seems to be condoning as okay.  The only reason this 2013 should be reposted is to say that it is wrong.  It is not an example of following Christ.  Instead, it seems to be used to justify the ugliness of pride among those who supposedly desire to imitate Jesus and Mary.  Don’t spread evilness @nikita92 Older women endure enough discrimination already!  Why spread more out of pride? To feel knowledgeable and respected? Seek humility and not awe from others.

You'll fare much better on this board if you give people a greater benefit of the doubt rather than assuming the worst about them. 

[HollyDolly]

 Why does everyone  have to snip at each other? So much of this goes on nowadays because of social media.Did it happen in the past yes, but it's really gotten worse since this modern age. I once wanted to be a nun, in fact my parents took me to see the Discaled Carmelites in San Antonio, of course we had an appointment. Did I join, no.Why, because my mom had a stroke and took care of her until she passed, and then later my dad with his COPD until he died. Have I thought about it, yes. But something more active, like the Parish Visitors of Mary Immaculate, or Sisters of Charity,etc. especially work with children and the elderly, and families in general. However, I'm still working  and haven't retired yet, especially with this whole Covid -19 deal, not sure when would be a good time to do so.   Maybe the life of a beguine would suit me if it was possible. I know there are a few in Europe still, and if there were any in Germany (dad's side), it's possible I  had some ancestor who was a member  centuries ago, maybe that's why the idea appeals to me.  For those who are over the age limit of some communities, maybe they have an associates program, or volunteer program for those active  enough in their golden years who can help. 

[Mhairi]

If I remember right, this original post was from someone who had been in a contemplative community for several years and had witnessed quite a few entrances and exits, and I certainly encountered some interesting people who were discerning with my community in my time in religious life in the 80s. I can only speak for the UK and a couple of contemplative communities now, but with the advent of Cor Orans the discernment process (on both sides) gives both community and discerner up to 2 years as an aspirant, up to 2 years as a postulant, and up to 2.5 years as a novice, so there is certainly more time for a thorough exploration of all the joys and challenges of community living! There are many women and men out there who want to explore if God is calling them to religious life and a period of aspirancy can facilitate that process without commitment on either side.

Personally I would be wary of any community that rushes any part of the process. I know of one contemplative community in the UK who has basically insisted that prospective entrants do not have a ‘live-in’ and give away everything prior to entering (with the community being the beneficiary). This happened to two people in their 50s who were left penniless when the community voted for them to leave. This is downright unethical apart from anything.

[Sponsa-Christi]

11 hours ago, Mhairi said:

I know of one contemplative community in the UK who has basically insisted that prospective entrants do not have a ‘live-in’ and give away everything prior to entering (with the community being the beneficiary). This happened to two people in their 50s who were left penniless when the community voted for them to leave. This is downright unethical apart from anything.

This is also *really,* super-against canon law!

[Mhairi]

Yes indeed, Sponsa! Sadly it didn’t stop the community doing it …

[Sister Leticia]

On 12/1/2021 at 6:10 PM, Mhairi said:

I know of one contemplative community in the UK who has basically insisted that prospective entrants do not have a ‘live-in’ and give away everything prior to entering (with the community being the beneficiary). This happened to two people in their 50s who were left penniless when the community voted for them to leave.

I'm in the UK, and I'm now wondering which community this is. The most enclosed one I can think of (ie, a community unlikely to allow live-ins, because it would mean allowing someone who is not a sister into the enclosure) has an upper age limit of 35. 

I'll add that when people are utterly in love with Christ, then they might well want to divest themselves of everything and be as radical as possible. After all, we admire Christ's disciples and our favourite saints for just such generosity and radicality. And of course, nobody embarks on religious life or marriage thinking it might be temporary! - so they don't think they'll regret getting rid of things, because they don't want to imagine every needing them again. So, their generosity and fervour needs to be nurtured, of course, BUT there is a need for prudent, impartial advice, and practical help. Assigning your property to a trusted person (instead of selling it) or storing things in someone's attic while in formation doesn't make you less fervent or "given" - it just means you're being sensible!

[Mhairi]

Sr Leticia, guess again! It is a community that has had two Apostolic visitations regarding this and other concerns. It is a sad but true state of affairs …