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Barriers to Confession


A Yearning Heart

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A Yearning Heart

It's been a while since my last confession and I'm finding approaching this sacrament incredibly hard. I think about it often and that I should go and then don't.  I'm not sure why this is so hard. 

When I think back to previous ones, I've also found those incredibly hard to do too.

What are some barriers to Confession and how are these overcome? 

Edited by A Yearning Heart
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When I was away for a while a Dominican priest told me despair and worry, the devil loves. He had me promise (slipped once) to never have fear or being uncomfortable keep me away. I would in the past, know a church near me had 11:15 to 12 confessions on Saturday and make an appt in my head. I wont lie, some Saturday's I planned to go got too busy but it helped to make it part of my day. I got to know what priests were kind and helpful and didn't let one or two who weren't as good at counsel or forgiveness, deter me. It had a friend of mine keep away decades ago being traumatized by a confession and that is a sin too I think, you never have a repentant soul feel less than when it took so long and it was so hard to go. Honest yes, but not mean. It was about abortion and I know it weighed heavily on her and felt terrible, unlike today, the healing couldn't begin.

I like not seeing the priest, I go to different churches and they all have that option but when I was away a very long time and knew I'd be a while, I made an appt with a priest not in my parish and met him in the rectory and over the kitchen table, poured out my heart. Unconventional maybe but it was how I was guided back. I needed that connection then and to know someone wasn't outside thinking "This is taking a while".

Just tell yourself, I am going to do this "fill in a day" Make an appt if you think you need more time, don't let so many human emotions keep you away. I am going to do this for next weekend. No sin is too much, don't make pride keep you away from feeling so good when you leave.

 

 

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Sometimes thinking about the grace and mercy of Christ and meditating on this is a beautiful way to approach Confession when you feel scared or afraid or dejected. It is always more about His redeeming love than your sinfulness. 

I will pray for you! Maybe too ask St John Vianney to intercede for you- he was known for his goodness as a confessor.

Oh and if you're afraid of not knowing what to say or the formula or when you say which responses or how to begin at confession, just tell the priest that you might need some guidance or help! Or read this little booklet from YouCat- especially page 7. (This is very basic but it's helpful I think)

https://assets.ctfassets.net/e1rvcpbj76la/35bY5Er2atkUj9t2kcbUJn/70b4199eaa6a0a6941605d489f2f5045/Conf-handbook-material-eng-11.pdf

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On 8/13/2022 at 12:33 AM, A Yearning Heart said:

how are these overcome?

I recommend reading "The Four Last Things" by St. Thomas More.  Part of the problem today is that we're so involved with everything going on around us and online, and especially with constant news around the world now, it's overwhelming and it takes away from our ability to focus on the things we should.

https://www.amazon.com/Things-Supplication-Souls-Dialogue-Conscience/dp/1889334650

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 8/13/2022 at 1:33 AM, A Yearning Heart said:

It's been a while since my last confession and I'm finding approaching this sacrament incredibly hard. I think about it often and that I should go and then don't.  I'm not sure why this is so hard. 

When I think back to previous ones, I've also found those incredibly hard to do too.

What are some barriers to Confession and how are these overcome? 

Did you go to the sacrament?

 

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  • 3 months later...
A Yearning Heart

Yes, I did but it took a while longer than I'd hoped. 

But thankfully and due to many prayers, was able to go. I feel like a real **** for avoiding/leaving that so long! 

 

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5 hours ago, A Yearning Heart said:

I feel like a real **** for avoiding/leaving that so long! 

 

Raise your right hand. Turn the palm backward. Pat yourself on the back for a job well done. Stop feeling like "a real ****." 🙂

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Honestly, I think the best thing to do is to schedule it, like you would any other important thing, like a doctor's appointment. If you leave it up to chance, then it won't happen. Put it in your calendar: On this day, at this parish, at this time, I'm going to Confession. Then set a reminder on your phone so that you won't forget. 

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