Christian value - Tolerance?

[Didacus]

Is tolerance a christian virtue?  Yes or No?

STATE YOUR CASE!

[dUSt]

No.

The seven heavenly virtues are:

• Humility
• Charity
• Chastity
• Gratitude
• Temperance
• Patience
• Diligence

Tolerance does not appear in that list.

[Didacus]

I agree.

Why is it that Christians are called upon to be tolerant then?

[Anomaly]

Define tolerance and how it is applied.   
 

Is allowing your unwed and pregnant daughter to live in your home being tolerant of her lack of chastity?

[Luigi]

Tolerance, by me, includes the idea of allowing the other person to exercise her independence - she has to think for herself, exercise her own conscience, make her own decisions, live (or die) with the consequences of those decisions, take responsibility for her own life.

It also involves the idea of charity - seeing myself as connected to you. So I shouldn't rush to cut someone off from my acquaintance, or social circle. What is called 'shunning' in some churches should be a last resort. 

But love should trump all of that. I still need to want what is best for the other person. And here, one can make very few generalizations. In the example of the unwed pregnant daughter, if she's very capable and independent, it might be best for her not to live in your home; if she's immature, naive, or gullible, then maybe it's best for her to live in your home. And in this particular example, there's also the need to want what's best for the forthcoming child. 

There's also the question of one's relationship to the person being 'tolerated' (which goes back to charity). Is this my child, for whom I'm responsible, and whom I should train up in the ways of the Lord? How old is the child? OR is this my eight-years-older sibling, who might accept some input from me but who isn't going to follow my suggestions unless she can see clear personal benefits to herself? OR is this a college student in my class, whom I'm responsible to respect and teach but not so much to form as a human being? OR is this a coworker? A neighbor? A stranger in the grocery store? 

Charity tells us to accept - and respect - each person as a sister or brother. But some of our sisters and brothers are like sheep without a shepherd. If I'm in a position to offer counsel, I should do that; if I'm not...

[dUSt]

Yeah, don't confuse tolerance with any of the Christian virtues we should be adhering to. We should not tolerate evil, but we should always tolerate people, because that's charity, not tolerance.

[little2add]

“Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

JC

[Credo in Deum]

On 12/17/2023 at 12:59 PM, Didacus said:

Is tolerance a christian virtue?  Yes or No?

STATE YOUR CASE!

 

 

 

Yes and no, it depends. 

We are called to be tolerant of individuals, but not towards ideas. 

We are called to be tolerant of sinners, not towards sin. 

 

Edited December 29, 2023 by Credo in Deum

[Didacus]

Seems that many modern day christians confuse tolerance of the sinner with tolerance of the sin.

Society has 'played' christians on that angle it seems... when sinners define themselves by their sins and cannot differentiate between the two for themselves, it really stagnates the christian approach to reality.  aka - sexual preferences defined as what a person is... `born this way' hence alleviating themselves of their personnal responsiblity.

 

To me tolerance is to extend my love, even though the sin of the sinner hurt me (aka, he stole 20$ from me, I'll neve have it back, but I will refrain from seeking revenge and still be charitable to the thief)

[Norseman82]

In my experience, "Tolerance" is a buzzword the enemy is using to shame people for stating the truth, especially in deviant sexual behaviors.

[Luigi]

On 1/3/2024 at 1:27 PM, Didacus said:

Seems that many modern day christians confuse tolerance of the sinner with tolerance of the sin.

... `born this way' hence alleviating themselves of their personal responsibility.

I agree. We can understand this, perhaps more easily or clearly, if we substitute something other than an outright sin: 

- "I was born diabetic;" right, but you're still personally responsible for eating in such a way as to not make your diabetes worse
- "I was born alcoholic" (some people do have a genetic proclivity toward alcoholism): right, but you're still personally responsible for not driving drunk or letting alcoholism affect your life - and other people's lives - negatively
- "I was born with ADD;" right, but you are still personally responsible for learning to make lists, set timelines/deadlines, reward yourself for staying on task, or whatever else.

We're all born with some positive traits and some negative traits. And we're all personally responsible for strengthening the positive traits and learning to deal with the negative traits. It's not that complicated, and it's not a new idea. 

[Didacus]

On 1/14/2024 at 12:19 PM, Norseman82 said:

In my experience, "Tolerance" is a buzzword the enemy is using to shame people for stating the truth, especially in deviant sexual behaviors.

A sneaky trick, but unfortunately effective.  People fear being tagged with 'ugly words' like intolerant more so then being on the wrong side of the conversation.  Takes courage to state the truth these days, especially stating the Truth.

16 hours ago, Luigi said:

I agree. We can understand this, perhaps more easily or clearly, if we substitute something other than an outright sin: 

- "I was born diabetic;" right, but you're still personally responsible for eating in such a way as to not make your diabetes worse
- "I was born alcoholic" (some people do have a genetic proclivity toward alcoholism): right, but you're still personally responsible for not driving drunk or letting alcoholism affect your life - and other people's lives - negatively
- "I was born with ADD;" right, but you are still personally responsible for learning to make lists, set timelines/deadlines, reward yourself for staying on task, or whatever else.

We're all born with some positive traits and some negative traits. And we're all personally responsible for strengthening the positive traits and learning to deal with the negative traits. It's not that complicated, and it's not a new idea. 

Yes indeed, I agree!

Its like the primacy of conscience - we are to act to the limit of our conscience, regardless of scripture or dogma... HOWEVER - we are held responsible to exercise our conscience to its potential by discerning scripture and dogma.  Primacy of conscience is NOT A LICENSE TO DO WHAT YOU WANT.

[Anastasia13]

So what does this mean for my friendship with a homosexual coworker? 

On 1/3/2024 at 11:27 AM, Didacus said:

Seems that many modern day christians confuse tolerance of the sinner with tolerance of the sin.

Society has 'played' christians on that angle it seems... when sinners define themselves by their sins and cannot differentiate between the two for themselves, it really stagnates the christian approach to reality.  aka - sexual preferences defined as what a person is... `born this way' hence alleviating themselves of their personnal responsiblity.

 

To me tolerance is to extend my love, even though the sin of the sinner hurt me (aka, he stole 20$ from me, I'll neve have it back, but I will refrain from seeking revenge and still be charitable to the thief)

I think about this sometimes. I have seen signs and heard that homosexuals are going to hell and gays are going to hell. When I was younger, I thought people were saying those with homosexual attraction (disordered attraction) are going to hell (regardless of what they do with it.

Years later a public health worker said that understood those terms clinically to refer to those who engage in or have engaged in such behavior. I am not entirely sure everyone uses those terms the same way.

Edited October 5, 2025 by Anastasia13

[Luigi]

As dUSt said in December '23: 

"The seven heavenly virtues are:
Humility
Charity
Chastity
Gratitude
Temperance
Patience
Diligence

Tolerance does not appear in that list."

However, you are not responsible for your homosexual coworker's innate desires, history, experience, life decisions, etc. You must be charitable (in its basic meaning, charity mean seeing that you are connected to other people) and loving (in its basic meaning, love means wanting what is best for the other person) toward everyone. So treat him with the same respect and dignity that you treat your heterosexual workers with. 

If a homosexual coworker asked me about the Catholic Church's position on homosexuality, I would explain it the best I could. But I would not walk in one Monday morning and begin preaching to him about homosexuality and hell. I'm not trained in it; I doubt that it would change his mind (I assume other people, with closer relationships to him, have already talked to him about it); he would perceive it as uncharitable; and when one is at work, one is supposed to work (that's justice), not try to change people's long-held and deeply held beliefs.

You probably also work with people who are living together without benefit of marriage, or using recreational drugs, or have a gambling addiction, or lots of other possibilities - the world is a sinful place and it always has been. But at work, that's none of your business; if someone asks - at lunch, or on break time - I'd be honest, but I'd also tell them, "We should talk about this later in more depth; I'm no expert; I can refer to experts; I can give you some resources" or some combination of all that. 

[Anastasia13]

On 12/17/2023 at 12:59 PM, Didacus said:

Is tolerance a christian virtue?  Yes or No?

STATE YOUR CASE!

It depends if you get actually drunk while developing it or just a little buzzed on a regular basis.

yes or no? State your case. 🥂 🍻

Edited October 11, 2025 by Anastasia13

[Anomaly]

Tolerance: The ability to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behaviors that one does not necessarily agree with.  
 

Essentially, it’s active Christian humility, charity, temperance, and patience.   Not being an empty gong.   1 Corinthians 13. 

[Didacus]

On 10/5/2025 at 4:52 PM, Anastasia13 said:

So what does this mean for my friendship with a homosexual coworker? 

I think about this sometimes. I have seen signs and heard that homosexuals are going to hell and gays are going to hell. When I was younger, I thought people were saying those with homosexual attraction (disordered attraction) are going to hell (regardless of what they do with it.

Years later a public health worker said that understood those terms clinically to refer to those who engage in or have engaged in such behavior. I am not entirely sure everyone uses those terms the same way.

Maintaining the friendship and charitable stance towards your friend does not mean endorsing his sinful nature... you can be friends with him or her even though you disagree with their lifestyles can you not?  If they reject you for your difference of opinion - then the fault is theirs for being intolerant of you.

On 10/21/2025 at 11:59 AM, Anomaly said:

Tolerance: The ability to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behaviors that one does not necessarily agree with.  
 

Essentially, it’s active Christian humility, charity, temperance, and patience.   Not being an empty gong.   1 Corinthians 13. 

But notice the tolerance part does not endorse of excuse the errors presented to you - tolerance does not include agreement.  And humility, charity, temperance and patience are the virtues - tolerance is a manifestation in certain circumstances - but it is not a virtue in and of itself.