JP2Iloveyou Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 I wouldn't know from personal experience since I ain't married. But my Catholic friends sure are lovin' *ahem* married life. Same here. Currently, I'm in the seminary and the fact that I'm a virgin in every way makes it easier for me to be chaste. However, should the Lord not be calling me to the priesthood and is instead calling me to the married life, I can only imagine the joy I will feel when my wife and I express our love to each other in the greatest way God invisioned. That's why I can't understand why so many young people fornicate today. They say, "just use a condom and it will be OK." There's little chance for pregnancy or and STD. Aside from that statement being blatantly false, they totally disregard the fact that it is sinful and if left unrepented for, could earn you a one-way ticket down south if you know what I mean. They also care nothing for their future spouse. Imagine, the night of your wedding, you are about to consumate your marriage with your partner for life, and you look him/her in the eye, and say, "I hope you're as good as Jane/John." I want to be able to look my future wife in the eye, if God blesses me with one, and tell her that I loved her so much, even before we met, that I waited for her. Also, I realize many readers of this may have made mistakes in the past. Realize, God forgives you and it is never to late to decide to be chaste. When I was younger, I knew there was a line to not cross sexually, but I got as close to that line as I possibly could. Through the grace of God, by praying often, attending daily Mass, and praying at least one Rosary every day, these sins are no longer a problem for me. Nothing is impossible with God.
Paladin D Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 Sorry if this may be a little off subject but... Is it perfectly "OK" for a Catholic couple to masturbate BUT before ejaculation...emm...bond together? It's still procreation, without the...the...thrusting... Anyone?
BLAZEr Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 Anyone? I thought I did . . . or at least tried to . . . this is a pretty weird sitiuation you describe, but let me try again: If masturbation of each other (or even or ones self) is a part of the sexual act (part of union) than I would say that it is ok . . . but it seems disordered to me, if two people jsut sat next to each other and masturabted while watching each other, then just got together for the "climax" . . . first, the man would probably get there first, and second . . . why are they doing this again? All I can say is . . . virginity is looking better and better . . . .
Lil Red Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 Also, I realize many readers of this may have made mistakes in the past. Realize, God forgives you and it is never to late to decide to be chaste. I just wanted to interject something here. Many girls (and some guys for that matter) have such low self-esteem that anytime someone shows them affection/love/etc. they jump to please that person. And if that leads to sex, or simulated sex or whatever, it makes them feel loved. Some may not think it's because they have low self-esteem. But it is. Is it a mistake? Yeah. Should we make them feel worse cuz they've made one? No.
Guest jrob8503 Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 (edited) I have also heard, someone can correct me if I'm wrong, but the Church also teaches that it is OK for the husband to bring his wife to orgasm as well, as long as the act does not take away from the procreative aspect of sex. Wait a second. Tell me this. If that is true, does it mean performing oral sex on a woman is OK as long as the sperm is deposited prior to the act, and the woman hasn't yet climaxed? If, yes. Then the claims made regarding the Church being unfair to women are bogus. Edited October 23, 2003 by jrob8503
JP2Iloveyou Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 Wait a second. Tell me this. If that is true, does it mean performing oral sex on a woman is OK as long as the sperm is deposited, and the woman hasn't yet climaxed? If, yes. Then the claims made regarding the Church being unfair to women are bogus. Pope Pius XII said, "The Creator himself...established that in the [generative] function, spouses should experience pleasure and enjoyment of body and spirit. Therefore, the spouses do nothing eveil in seeking this pleasure and enjoyment. They accept what the Creator has intended for them. At the same time, spouses should know how to keep themselves within the limits of just moderation." So, pertaining to the issue at hand, I have heard it said that oral sex within the confines of marriage is morally permissible, as long as it does not in any way take away from the procreative means of sex. I don't want to scandalize anyone, so I'm going to not elaborate on this a great deal. I think what this means is that it can be done to the woman at any time and done to the man as long as the crucial moment is where it can lead to a new life. Now, I can't say for sure whether or not these were orthodox theologians, so I would take this with a grain of salt. My best advice: check "Theology of the Body." You can't go wrong quoting JP2. I was very hesitant to post this, since I do NOT know if this is official Church teaching or not. I DO NOT want to lead anyone to sin or to heresy. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, do not take this as dogma. It is only my completely fallible interpretation. I beg you, please check "Theology of the Body."
Dave Posted October 23, 2003 Author Posted October 23, 2003 What the Church teaches is that oral sex can NEVER be an end in itself -- always a MEANS to an end, namely, regular intercourse.
jmjtina Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 just to make a quick interjection as well, in one of the Catholic Answers radio shows, they asked about oral sex and other "stuff" w/n marriage. His answer didn't go into alot of detail, but his statement was just because your married doesn't make everything okay to do. You must strive to make it holy. I'm looking it up......
CatholicAndFanatical Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 is it me or is anyone else here feel odd about talking about this? I know its human nature, but the details in some of your posts are difficult to read for us people trying (stress trying) to remain chaste. just thought id ask, if its just me then so be it. my bad.
mp15 Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 is it me or is anyone else here feel odd about talking about this? I know its human nature, but the details in some of your posts are difficult to read for us people trying (stress trying) to remain chaste. just thought id ask, if its just me then so be it. my bad. I for one do not find it difficult. Human sexuality is something that one should not be ashamed of, and that is the sense I get sometimes from people; Shame
CatholicAndFanatical Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 well it might very well be shame on my part, im not afraid to admit that. Not for sexuality as a whole because I know its normal, good to have sexual thoughts and feelings. But I catch your drift, it is shame that I feel and probably shouldnt, so I'll go crawl back in my hole, sorry to jump in the middle like that :D *slithers away* :wacko:
mp15 Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 well it might very well be shame on my part, im not afraid to admit that. Not for sexuality as a whole because I know its normal, good to have sexual thoughts and feelings. But I catch your drift, it is shame that I feel and probably shouldnt, so I'll go crawl back in my hole, sorry to jump in the middle like that :D *slithers away* Hey, no worries. You can't fix what you don't acknowledge is broke. Hang in there. :)
EcceNovaFacioOmni Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 (edited) Everyone knows that an orgasm must be achieved to procreate. I was refering to the act of sex "just for fun", which usually involves contraception. Sorry if I was hard to understand. I wish we didn't have to take a stand on oral sex and other in-marraige erotic acts. To me, they are just kind of gross and nasty and I wouldn't do them anyway. Edited October 23, 2003 by thedude
BLAZEr Posted October 23, 2003 Posted October 23, 2003 Father Stan says: "Spousal occupation and self-donation, the beauty of sacramental obligation. Oral Stimulation and gratification must be open to procreation. "
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