My Life

[the_rev]

I have come to the conclusion that I am a very lonley person, a person who becomes filled with anger. I can't handle it when I am mocked and made fun of. Today at our Drama Production one person said something, I blew up because it wasn't to complimentry and started walking home, the director stopped and gave me a ride back.

I always feel like I am scum, you know a piece of gum that is stuck on your shoe and you can't get it off. It's like I'm always in the way. If I am in the hallway with no one around someone always comes by and says your in the way.

After the production I walked a mile and half to where we all went to eat supper because no one would give me a ride there.

I'm always a nice person, a person who tries to act like Christ did. When someone needs a ride home, even if it is ten miles away from our house, my mom and I are always willing to give them a ride home. However it seems when I need a ride home one is never given.

Last night, I went to Green Bay with a few of the people from Drama, and at WalMart and the other stores, they continually made fun of me by stating I was a girl, and should buy something from the female section.

However, when in Green Bay and everyone was hungry, I did offer to buy each person one thing from the dollar menu, would I expect a simple thank you for hte food. Nope! Just continual nagging.

This has all led to the breakdown of my selfesteem. And this is the reason why I feel that I need to be somewhere else.

So I leave you all in the words of Our Lady, God in God's Peace!

In Christ,

Eddie Lee

[Dudette]

Eddie, don't let what others think of you change your life.
Drop your human respect (hope you know what I'm saying by that) Think of how you're pleasing Christ and how happy that's making Him! You will receive your reward in Heaven and it will be great!

Prayers for you!

Edited March 19, 2005 by Dudette

[geetarplayer]

Know that you are still in my prayers, bro.

-Mark

[Guest Eremite]

Don't worry about what other people think of you. If they like you, they like you. If they don't, they don't. Just do your thing, be who you are, and let the chips fall where they may. Life is too short to get caught up in their little personal dramas.

[Cathurian]

Eddie,

I am so sorry. You have my prayers, and those of Our Lady and all the angels and saints.

[Cathurian]

And even though it might be hard to realise...

You're blessing those who curse you. Loving your enemies.

It's hard but you're doing such a good thing, something most of us can only aspire to.

May God be with you and give you strength. In the name of the Father, and the son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

[Catholictothecore]

You humble me, man. Truly, you do inspire me, cause if someone treated me like that, I would act on "let 'em walk the ten miles." I'd regret it a second later and ask forgiveness, but I'd still say it.


However, there [i]is[/i] a difference between being selfless and being a pushover. I don't think that's you, but keep praying for them; as we grow, maturity kicks in in someway or an other, no matter how badly we fight it.

[theculturewarrior]

You're too nice.

[Guest Eremite]

"Loneliness is the greatest suffering anyone can ever experience."--Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta

The Lord often makes us outcasts among men to detach us from them and cleave to himself all the more. All the Saints knew the pain of loneliness, as did the Lord himself, whose friends couldn't even stay awake with him in his hour of desperation in gethsemane.

[Birgitta Noel]

Eddie,

Why do you continue to hang with these Drama folks? If you enjoy the Dramatic stuff stick with the group as far as the actual plays etc go, but then just head home. Maybe they'll notice that you're not hanging out with them and if/when they ask why tell them that you're tired of being disrespected. Then they have the option to change or not.

Lonliness is one thing. Being trampled upon is entirely another.

Hang in there!

[Carnanc]

[quote name='Eremite' date='Mar 18 2005, 11:47 PM'] "Loneliness is the greatest suffering anyone can ever experience."--Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta

The Lord often makes us outcasts among men to detach us from them and cleave to himself all the more. All the Saints knew the pain of loneliness, as did the Lord himself, whose friends couldn't even stay awake with him in his hour of desperation in gethsemane. [/quote]
prayers

[Phazzan]

Edward, take their insults with a grain of salt. You show your weakness they will pounce, you should know that. If they like to make fun of you, perhaps you should stand up for yourself, cause if you don't, they will continue to make fun of you.

[toledo_jesus]

stick up for yourself. If you don't really WANT to buy these jerks some food, then don't. If you don't LIKE these people, then don't associate with them. They are surely not the only game in town. They obviously don't think of you too highly, so you aren't doing them any favors by hanging around. Find some people who will treat you like a friend, and don't look back. Humility is knowing your place, not being a victim all the time. You are at least equal to them in dignity, and if they do not see that then just walk away.

[the_rev]

[quote name='Phazzan' date='Mar 19 2005, 10:57 AM'] Edward, take their insults with a grain of salt. You show your weakness they will pounce, you should know that. If they like to make fun of you, perhaps you should stand up for yourself, cause if you don't, they will continue to make fun of you. [/quote]
I almost punched one of those jerks last night.

[jasJis]

Join the club of low self-esteem people.
Why do we judge ourselves through other's eyes? And once we let other's know we do, we give them power. Once we give them that power, the wield it against us to get a reaction so they can watch a show.
And you have handed this power and control to people in a Drama club and expect them to resist? They are doing wrong and you are making it easy for them.

Eddie. The most damaging thing we can do is to forget that God Himself would suffer for you personally. He does this for you with complete knowledge of your imperfections, sins, failures, evil deeds, etc. You know this, but forget this often. I've done the same for many, many years. Why do we seem to care so much about people who are mean to us and so easily miss the people who are so nice to us?

In my darkest years, a non-Catholic co-worker (whom I didn't really like) gave me a small statue of Jesus in a little case to carry in my pocket. I'm not really sure why. I carried that statue for many years, but lost it when I got into the habit of carrying it with my rosary & case. It must have fallen out when I was getting my keys one day. I pray that God gave this to someone else who needed it.

But that little metal statue was a constant reminder that God had not abandoned me. I would clank against change, keys, or my rosary often and remind me. It reminded me often that God loves me and is thinking about me. Jesus was never too busy to take my hand and remind me He loved me. I often would grasp that little statue and remember. It drew my attention to those who love me (especially the Holy Trinity). It game me courage to look to judge me through the Father's eyes who wept with Joy when the Prodigal son began his return to the Father. I will never be a perfect saint, nor will you. There will allways be many people cooler, better looking, luckier, happier acting, more talanted, smarter, richer, and have more of anything you have. God loves them no more than he loves you and I. You and I have so much right this second, right at this time in our lives, that there is no reason we shouldn't laugh with joy. God also understands our frailty and weakness that brings sadness and lonlieness to our hearts. It doesn't disappoint Him. He is still patiently, and lovingly, holding us in His arms and wiping our needless tears.

[dUSt]

Just keep lying to yourself and say that you do not have low self-esteem. Keep telling yourself that you're the most confident, assured person in the world. That's what I do. It works for me.

[Phazzan]

[quote name='dUSt' date='Mar 19 2005, 10:26 AM'] Just keep lying to yourself and say that you do not have low self-esteem. Keep telling yourself that you're the most confident, assured person in the world. That's what I do. It works for me. [/quote]
It works for me too.

[jasJis]

Clanky metal Jesus statues are so much cooler.

[theculturewarrior]

[quote name='toledo_jesus' date='Mar 19 2005, 10:04 AM'] stick up for yourself. If you don't really WANT to buy these jerks some food, then don't. If you don't LIKE these people, then don't associate with them. They are surely not the only game in town. They obviously don't think of you too highly, so you aren't doing them any favors by hanging around. Find some people who will treat you like a friend, and don't look back. Humility is knowing your place, not being a victim all the time. You are at least equal to them in dignity, and if they do not see that then just walk away. [/quote]
this is great advice. I would however recommend that you not resort to violence, except in self defense.

[Fidei Defensor]

"The disloyal will get what their conduct deserves,
and a good man, what his deeds deserve."
--Proverbs 14:14