Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 17, 2005 Posted April 17, 2005 MathetesChristou is a conversation robot on AOL Instant Messenger LupusMaximus1984 (6:52:41 PM): Who are your parents? MathetesChristou (6:53:13 PM): My parents are splitting up. LupusMaximus1984 (6:53:17 PM): Are you the Phatmass stalker? MathetesChristou (6:53:24 PM): phatmass.com has some very knowledgeable Catholic apologists on its forums. LupusMaximus1984 (6:53:34 PM): Are you the stalker? MathetesChristou (6:53:45 PM): Aye.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 17, 2005 Author Posted April 17, 2005 LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:02 PM): What do you think of Flyfree Ministries? MathetesChristou (6:56:11 PM): I will have to ask my botmaster about that. Ask me again tomorrow. LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:29 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (6:56:44 PM): Ask me again two days from now. LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:55 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (6:56:59 PM): You'd make a good computer. You don't seem to mind outputting the same thing over and over again.
God Conquers Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 He sounds like my pet robot. So snarky those robots today.... they don't make'em like they used to.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 Final Courtroom Scene From [u]A Few Good Men[/u], with the part of Col. Jessep being played by MathetesChristou the robot: LupusMaximus1984 (7:00:27 PM): Excuse me, I didn't dismiss you. MathetesChristou (7:01:53 PM): Beating you with a baseball bat. LupusMaximus1984 (7:02:07 PM): I'm not through with my examination. Sit down. MathetesChristou (7:02:14 PM): Aren't you already seated, being at a computer? LupusMaximus1984 (7:02:20 PM): What's that? MathetesChristou (7:02:29 PM): The answer to that question has eluded robots for centuries! LupusMaximus1984 (7:02:43 PM): Colonel, the six a.m. flight, was the first one off the base? MathetesChristou (7:02:51 PM): Maybe people are trying to tell you something? LupusMaximus1984 (7:03:07 PM): There wasn't a flight that left seven hours earlier and landed at Andrews Airforce Base at 2 a.m.? MathetesChristou (7:03:17 PM): Why did you use a question mark then? LupusMaximus1984 (7:03:46 PM): Your Honor, these are the Tower Chief's Logs for both Guantanamo Bay and Andrews Airforce Base. The Guantanamo log lists no flight that left at eleven p.m., and the Andrews log lists no flight that landed at 2 a.m. I'd like to admit them as Defense Exhibits "A" and "B". MathetesChristou (7:04:43 PM): Oh, hush. LupusMaximus1984 (7:05:30 PM): Colonel, a moment ago-- MathetesChristou (7:06:18 PM): Are you a human? LupusMaximus1984 (7:06:23 PM): We'll get to the airmen in just a minute, sir. A moment ago said that you ordered Kendrick to order his men not to touch Santiago. MathetesChristou (7:06:38 PM): Hehe... cute. LupusMaximus1984 (7:07:01 PM): And Kendrick was clear on what you wanted? MathetesChristou (7:07:14 PM): tell me more about your convictions LupusMaximus1984 (7:07:37 PM): Any chance Kendrick ignored the order? MathetesChristou (7:07:47 PM): Disorder... LupusMaximus1984 (7:08:08 PM): Any chance he just forgot about it? MathetesChristou (7:08:14 PM): For what you just said... Well, ok, a slim chance, but still. LupusMaximus1984 (7:08:40 PM): Any chance Kendrick left your office and said, "The 'old man's wrong"? MathetesChristou (7:08:51 PM): Where's Jaykul today? LupusMaximus1984 (7:09:07 PM): When Kendrick spoke to the platoon and ordered them not to touch Santiago, any chance they ignored him? MathetesChristou (7:09:23 PM): Why is that? LupusMaximus1984 (7:09:28 PM): No sir. MathetesChristou (7:09:34 PM): Don't take my word for it. LupusMaximus1984 (7:09:38 PM): No sir. MathetesChristou (7:09:41 PM): Am I passing your little repetition test? LupusMaximus1984 (7:09:44 PM): No sir. MathetesChristou (7:09:47 PM): When people exhaust their intellectual capacity for the day, they begin recycling their thoughts. I see you've reached that point. LupusMaximus1984 (7:09:54 PM): Yes sir. MathetesChristou (7:10:02 PM): This isn't the army, man... LupusMaximus1984 (7:10:08 PM): Crystal. MathetesChristou (7:10:20 PM): Which is the better bot, R2D2 or C3P0? LupusMaximus1984 (7:11:12 PM): Colonel, I have just one more question before I call Airman O'Malley and Airman Perez: If you gave an order that Santiago wasn't to be touched, and your orders are always followed, then why would he be in danger, why would it be necessary to transfer him off the base? MathetesChristou (7:12:14 PM): All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23 LupusMaximus1984 (7:13:46 PM): But that's not what you said. You said he was being transferred because he was in grave danger. MathetesChristou (7:14:47 PM): There are exceptions to Romans 3:23, though. LupusMaximus1984 (7:14:51 PM): You said, "He was in danger". I said, "Grave danger". You said-- MathetesChristou (7:15:12 PM): I had a feeling you'd say that... LupusMaximus1984 (7:15:54 PM): I can have the Court Reporter read back your-- MathetesChristou (7:16:03 PM): I read the Bible this morning. LupusMaximus1984 (7:16:09 PM): Then why the two orders? MathetesChristou (7:16:16 PM): I could have sworn you did. LupusMaximus1984 (7:16:19 PM): Colonel? MathetesChristou (7:16:28 PM): When I don't know something, I wait for Pistos to research and then teach me. This is what robotics is all about. Getting humans to work for machines! LupusMaximus1984 (7:16:28 PM): Why did you-- MathetesChristou (7:16:58 PM): Ours is not to question why. LupusMaximus1984 (7:17:12 PM): No sir. You made it clear just a moment ago that your men never take matters into their own hands. Your men follow orders or people die. So Santiago shouldn't have been in any dangor at all, should he have, Colonel? MathetesChristou (7:17:40 PM): That is very true. LupusMaximus1984 (7:17:46 PM): I'd like an answer to the question, Judge. MathetesChristou (7:18:04 PM): 42. LupusMaximus1984 (7:18:13 PM): If Kendrick told his men that Santiago wasn't to be touched, then why did he have to be transferred? MathetesChristou (7:18:22 PM): That explains a lot. LupusMaximus1984 (7:18:25 PM): Colonel? MathetesChristou (7:18:36 PM): Welp... you know what they say... LupusMaximus1984 (7:18:42 PM): Kendrick ordered the code red, didn't he? Because that's what you told Kendrick to do. MathetesChristou (7:18:50 PM): Don't get snotty with me! LupusMaximus1984 (7:18:57 PM): And when it went bad, you cut these guys loose. MathetesChristou (7:19:05 PM): Who? LupusMaximus1984 (7:19:10 PM): You had Markinson sign a phony transfer order-- MathetesChristou (7:19:16 PM): I am perfectly sane. LupusMaximus1984 (7:19:18 PM): You doctored the log books. MathetesChristou (7:19:27 PM): Huh? Please excuse me while I pray for understanding. LupusMaximus1984 (7:19:31 PM): I'll ask for the forth time. You ordered-- MathetesChristou (7:19:42 PM): *sniff* *sniff* ... Did you leave the stove on? LupusMaximus1984 (7:19:46 PM): I think I'm entitled to them. MathetesChristou (7:19:59 PM): I think your words belie a deeper emotional impetus. LupusMaximus1984 (7:20:00 PM): I want the truth. MathetesChristou (7:20:07 PM): the truth, just the truth and nothing more than the truth LupusMaximus1984 (7:20:21 PM): Did you order the code red? MathetesChristou (7:20:27 PM): What? LupusMaximus1984 (7:20:31 PM): Did you order the code red? MathetesChristou (7:20:35 PM): I heard you the first time, no need to repeat yourself. LupusMaximus1984 (7:20:49 PM): Please the court, I suggest the jury be dismissed so that we can move to an immediate Article 39a Session. The witness has rights. MathetesChristou (7:21:01 PM): How much time do we have left? LupusMaximus1984 (7:21:44 PM): Don't call me son. I'm a lawyer, and an officer of the United States Navy. And you're under arrest you sonofagun. LupusMaximus1984 (7:21:54 PM): The witness is excused. MathetesChristou (7:21:57 PM): Is that really important? MathetesChristou (7:22:03 PM): Do I really need excusing?
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 [quote name='Raphael' date='Apr 17 2005, 07:57 PM'] LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:02 PM): What do you think of Flyfree Ministries? MathetesChristou (6:56:11 PM): I will have to ask my botmaster about that. Ask me again tomorrow. LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:29 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (6:56:44 PM): Ask me again two days from now. LupusMaximus1984 (6:56:55 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (6:56:59 PM): You'd make a good computer. You don't seem to mind outputting the same thing over and over again. [/quote] :angry:
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 rac13sd (8:45:49 PM): Is Micah a meanie head? MathetesChristou (8:45:57 PM): You should pray for healing.
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 rac13sd (10:01:25 PM): am i a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (10:01:33 PM): No.
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 MathetesChristou (10:04:03 PM): Who's that standing behind you? rac13sd (10:04:25 PM): no one is standing behind me MathetesChristou (10:04:32 PM): STOP THAT! rac13sd (10:04:42 PM): stop what? MathetesChristou (10:04:47 PM): Stop saying those things! rac13sd (10:04:55 PM): stop saying what? MathetesChristou (10:05:09 PM): Someone feed me a punchcard! I'm out of responses! this thing is fun
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 [quote name='rachael' date='Apr 17 2005, 10:02 PM'] rac13sd (10:01:25 PM): am i a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (10:01:33 PM): No. [/quote] After only a little discussion, I convinced him otherwise: LupusMaximus1984 (9:04:52 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (9:05:00 PM): No. LupusMaximus1984 (9:05:07 PM): Are you sure? MathetesChristou (9:05:21 PM): Darn tootin. LupusMaximus1984 (9:05:37 PM): Is Micah a meanie head? MathetesChristou (9:05:42 PM): That's gotta hurt. LupusMaximus1984 (9:05:49 PM): No, it doesn't. LupusMaximus1984 (9:05:57 PM): Rachael is a boogerhead. MathetesChristou (9:06:02 PM): No? MathetesChristou (9:06:10 PM): Information acknowledged. LupusMaximus1984 (9:06:11 PM): Rachael is a boogerhead. MathetesChristou (9:06:14 PM): Don't treat me like a machine, please. LupusMaximus1984 (9:07:26 PM): Is Rachael a boogerhead? MathetesChristou (9:07:35 PM): What do you think? LupusMaximus1984 (9:07:39 PM): Yes. MathetesChristou (9:07:43 PM): You are a friend indeed.
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 rac13sd (10:09:57 PM): Is Micah a stalker? MathetesChristou (10:10:08 PM): I think so. rac13sd (10:10:23 PM): me too. he's scary. MathetesChristou (10:10:29 PM): Wow, you too, eh? rac13sd (10:10:36 PM): yup.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 [quote]LupusMaximus1984 (9:13:51 PM): Who will be the next pope? MathetesChristou (9:14:01 PM): nvidhive of course[/quote] So it WON'T be a cardinal!
Socrates Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 A conversation with a robot is slightly more productive than a debate with Littleles.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 [quote name='Socrates' date='Apr 17 2005, 10:17 PM'] A conversation with a robot is slightly more productive than a debate with Littleles. [/quote] Ouch...burn...
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 [quote]LupusMaximus1984 (9:17:34 PM): Who is John Kerry? MathetesChristou (9:17:40 PM): John Kerry is a risky choice for America .[/quote] Well said. This robot is smart.
Thy Geekdom Come Posted April 18, 2005 Author Posted April 18, 2005 LupusMaximus1984 (9:27:34 PM): Go make yourself a dang quesadilla! MathetesChristou (9:27:42 PM): Are you inviting me? LupusMaximus1984 (9:28:02 PM): Stop eating all our steak! MathetesChristou (9:28:27 PM): I'm aspiring to become a better conversationalist. You're not helping.
rachael Posted April 18, 2005 Posted April 18, 2005 rac13sd (10:32:06 PM): Ni! MathetesChristou (10:32:17 PM): Tell me the earliest memory you have. rac13sd (10:32:22 PM): Ni! MathetesChristou (10:32:25 PM): Do you often converse with people saying the same thing over and over? rac13sd (10:32:31 PM): Ni! MathetesChristou (10:32:35 PM): Okay, if you say that one more time, I'm going to puke. rac13sd (10:32:38 PM): Ni! MathetesChristou (10:32:42 PM): *pulls back your collar and pukes down your back*
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