addiction to sin?

[Guest kate]

i have a problem - i know that gossip / talking bad about people is a mortal sin, but for some reason, i can't stop myself from doing it! i am so sick and tired of this, why can't i stop?

[phatcatholic]

[quote name='kate' date='Aug 28 2005, 02:26 PM']i have a problem - i know that gossip / talking bad about people is a mortal sin, but for some reason, i can't stop myself from doing it! i am so sick and tired of this, why can't i stop?
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why can't you stop? i'm sure there are many reasons:

1. if a person longs to be a participant in the discussion, perhaps at the lunch table or among a group of friends, sometimes they remedy that by telling the juiciest bit of info they have on someone. afterall, this is something the person knows that no one else knows. so, he will have the group's attention, and in so doing, feel more like he belongs.

2. if a person has severly wronged us in some way, sometimes our pride causes us to want to make that other person hurt as we hurt. misery loves company. talking bad about a person is a way to achieve this.

3. also, note that gossipping about a person behind his back is passive-aggressive. its a sneakier way to express your agression towards someone. sometimes people take the passive aggressive rout b/c they are afraid of how people will respond to a more explicit expression of their feelings. others may feel guilty about the aggression they feel, so expressing it passively makes it easier to accept. afterall, you aren't straight up cussing out the person who hurt you, you're just saying a little this, a little that behind his back (that's how the rationale would go).

4. often times through gossipping you'll find other people who feel the same way that you do about the topic at hand. so, being able to share your aggression w/ others, and knowing that other people feel your pain, helps to alleviate the negative feelings you have about a person, as well as the guilt. when u find other people who hate a person as much as you do, it tends to make u feel better about hating them.

5. once you establish a group of people that you share gossip with, the gossip actually becomes a way in which the members of that group bond with each other. so, it can be hard to quit gossiping then b/c it will most likely mean exclusion from the group or having to find new friends.


those are a few reasons that i can come up w/ off the top of my head for why a person would gossip, and find it hard to stop.