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can someone give me advice


spiritualbeing

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i'm seventeen years of age and for the most of my life i have thought god wanted me to become a priest. so in turn in high school, as i graduated early i never dated. i also never went to the dances, ie homecoming, sweater swirl, prom, welcome back to school dance, and others

people at school always made fun of me, and when i wanted to be cool i told them i didn't want to be a priest but actually deep down i think its what i'm suppose to do.

however recently i became really attracted to a few girls in general and i've never dated as i said before. so i don't know if i should give it a try or not, because really i don't know how to apporach all of this since i've always wanted to be a priest.

i could just avoid it and pray that i'm going in the right direction or i could give it a try and see where it goes.

like i said i've never dated and really i never had any friends that were girls while i was in school. so i don't even know how to go up to a girl i like that i don't know that well and just start casually talking and maybe ask her if she'd like to go out ot eat sometime.

for the order i want to join i don't even have to have a college degree because that is included within the formation, but i could go to college just to see where god wants me to head on with my life. basically i could go and start my canidadcy tomorrow and enter the order or i could give it time.

what do u all think i should.

i'm not asking you all to help me make some decisions in my life like if i should enter the order tomorrow, i'm just asking you all if you think i should try to date a girl or something and just see if it is for me or not.

thanks for your help amigos and amigas,

spiritualbeing

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I would say that if you're seriously discerning the priesthood, that you forego dating. Take it to prayer, surely, and if you have a Spiritual Director, talk to him about it. Sometimes our feelings can mess with our vocation, though. If you are pretty serious about the priesthood, I think you should say no to dating relationships right now and just really discern priesthood.

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from what i've gathered your considering the legion of Christ. that's good.

but i would recommend going on a few dates first.

you're in my prayers.

-brendan :lol:

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well spiritual being, i totally understand what you are going through, as someone who has just entered an order. I think that you should seriously consider how you relate to girls. Picture this, you are called to be a priest, and you have no idea how to talk to girls, or relate to girls in the confessional giving advice. If you do not know how to relate to girls as friends, you will have a hard time ministering to them. But i am sure most orders would tell you that.

But does that mean dating. Not necessarily. I think that you will need to find relationships with girls that will not have to be romantic. Because i can tell that it is pressing on your heart. And establish those ones. That doesnt mean date, or not date. But i would recommend that with all the other good advice that has been given you.

SHALOM

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I'm in agreement with MC. Knowing how to relate to the opposite sex (it doesn't have to be romantic!) is pretty important. Personally, I grew a great deal in my discernment of the religious life through a very close friendship with a seminarian who is now a religious brother. I learned through him more about the One who is calling me to be his bride, because he had many different insights into life, holiness, and the priestly vocation (the order I hope to enter is dedicated to praying for priests) that I never would have learned otherwise.

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[quote name='spiritualbeing' date='Sep 7 2005, 08:51 PM']i'm seventeen years of age and for the most of my life i have thought god wanted me to become a priest.  so in turn in high school, as i graduated early i never dated.  i also never went to the dances, ie homecoming, sweater swirl, prom, welcome back to school dance, and others

people at school always made fun of me, and when i wanted to be cool i told them i didn't want to be a priest but actually deep down i think its what i'm suppose to do.

however recently i became really attracted to a few girls in general and i've never dated as i said before.  so i don't know if i should give it a try or not, because really i don't know how to apporach all of this since i've always wanted to be a priest.

i could just avoid it and pray that i'm going in the right direction or i could give it a try and see where it goes.

like i said i've never dated and really i never had any friends that were girls while i was in school.  so i don't even know how to go up to a girl i like that i don't know that well and just start casually talking and maybe ask her if she'd like to go out ot eat sometime.

for the order i want to join i don't even have to have a college degree because that is included within the formation, but i could go to college just to see where god wants me to head on with my life.  basically i could go and start my canidadcy tomorrow and enter the order or i could give it time.

what do u all think i should.

i'm not asking you all to help me make some decisions in my life like if i should enter the order tomorrow, i'm just asking you all if you think i should try to date a girl or something and just see if it is for me or not.

thanks for your help amigos and amigas,

spiritualbeing
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Wow, I'm like, exactly in your position but instead of a boy, I'm a girl. This is crazy. And it does seem you are going to enter into the Legion? That's also crazy because I was a precandidate for the girls to see if I was called to be Consecrated.

Here is my advice: Give God the first chance in your life. I say don't worry about the girls and dating. Go to the Candidacy and discern your vocation there, you will learn a lot about both vocations, believe it or not. (Priesthood and Marriage.)

I'm only a year younger than you and I have never dated and don't plan on it till I'm 20, I have never gone to dances either. I'm also afraid of socializing with guys, haha.

If God wants you to be a priest, then you'll be a priest, but if he wants you to do something else...you can come out of the order and then do the dating. But you don't lose anything if you go straight to the order without dating.

And like others have said, pray. God will tell you what He wants you to do in His time. Also......talk with your Spiritual Director. (Is He a Legionary by any chance?)

I'll be praying lots for you!!

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[quote name='Dudette' date='Sep 8 2005, 10:09 AM']you don't lose anything if you go straight to the order without dating.

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I totally agree.

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I have to tell you something that a Retreat Master told us one time. He said that there was a young priest that was very distressed because He felt like he had fallen in love. So he went to talk to an older priest to tell about his problem. The older priest said something like this, "Oh, well, I've fallen in love about once every decade. But I am a priest and I give it to God and I go on."

What he was trying to say was that just because we are a Sister or a priest does not mean that we will not be tempted or attracted to other people. We're still human. We still have blood flowing through our veins.

So personally, it was beneficial for me to date before I became a Sister. Why? Because when I dated, God spoke to my heart that that was not the life He had for me. He wanted me to be a Sister instead.

If I would not have dated, I would have wondered my whole life if [i]maybe[/i] I should've gotten married. But because of my experience, [u]I have no doubt.[/u] Even if I am attracted to a guy every once and a while, I know that this is normal, and I am careful not to get too close to that person, and I go on. Jesus is the Spouse that I chose and that's final (I'm in Final Vows).

God bless you in this time! My prayers go out to you! :topsy:

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I too have been in your position, though more from the "I was told to date". I tried to feel "in love" with a significant other and never felt right to me. I have had an appreciation of the opposite sex mind you :blush: but like Sr. Mary Micheal says God was telling me that wasn't the life for me.

If you want to find out but don't want to go on "dates" with one girl alone, why not try going to a group activity and making a point of talking to some of the girls as friends?

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