Parishner Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 Hi, I am new to Phatmass and seventeen years old, I was homeschool, completed my schooling and now have a full time job. My name Parishner, refers to myself as a member here on phatmass. However I belong to not one Catholic Church. My job causes me to travel to many different cities. I am currently in one particular area where I will be for 6-10 months. I began going to a more of a traditional church. I'm not much on dating, heck I don't even know how to talk to a girl, or start a conversation. For a long time I thought I was called to the priesthood but after meeting with four vocation directors, (for the diocese and a few other orders) it was determined I didn't have a calling to be a priest but an attraction, that I wanted to be a priest. Now I think I am called to marriage. I first saw this one girl at mass my first weekend there, I told myself “she's cute, i wouldn't mind dating her” I have never been introduced but found out her name was Maria. I recently was invited out to eat at the local diner with this one person, because I was knew and he wanted to find out who I was and what I'm all about. During our conversation he stated that this one girl from mass had a crush on me, though I never talked to her, it was kinda like how I told myself she was cute and wouldn't mind dating her. It must have been a vibe thing or something. This one girl just happened to be Maria. However I haven't talked to Maria, though I think maybe I had a general conversation one day with a group of people saying who I am what i do for a living, etc. i haven;'t had a one on one conversation with her, and she is always with another person after mass always. I was wondering what you people think I should do. Should I ask her out? How do I start a conversation? Can u give me advice?
onathing1 Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 Definately talk to her. Then, if you feel you still want to, ask her out on a date.
prose Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 Find out if she is involved in any church groups (ie. a youth group), or something of the sort, then you can join and have a reason to talk to her! It seems like it might be weird just to walk up to her and ask her on a date since you don't even know eachother. Maybe if you don't know any groups she is involved with, you could find a way to just talk to her after Mass casually until you are more familiar with eachother I definately think you should so SOMETHING to act on this. Good Luck!
photosynthesis Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 how do you start a conversation? Saying hello is always good. Then, you can ask her how she's doing... find some kind of common ground to talk about (i.e. that you're both Catholic and go to Mass) and build from there.
theculturewarrior Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 I still haven't figured out how to talk to women. I can't force myself; it usually just happens. I can tell you this...if you stutter, trip over your tongue, and look really nervous, she might think it's adorable, so don't worry about that. Don't do it on purpose though! :
PadrePioOfPietrelcino Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 My sister used to play the cello for her Church during their services, one day she had a guy come up to her and tell her, I know we really know each other, but I've noticed you and thought I might like to get top know you better. Then he asked her out to the rodeo (neither of them had ever been). Now he is my Brother in Law. So take a risk, be yourself and pray, it might just work out. TALK TO HER. Ben
the_rev Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 (edited) uncharitable comment Edited November 7, 2005 by the_rev
the_rev Posted November 6, 2005 Posted November 6, 2005 (edited) double post Edited November 7, 2005 by the_rev
Lounge Daddy Posted November 7, 2005 Posted November 7, 2005 Moe: "hey - do you wanna go out... you know, out back?"
BC4Life Posted November 7, 2005 Posted November 7, 2005 definatly start a conversation with her, bro. just a casual "hows it going", etc. i think its best if you allow her to speak the most, but also talk when there is a pause. ask her questions, and then maybe ask her to do something with you. most importantly be yourself haha
Philippe Posted November 7, 2005 Posted November 7, 2005 go for it, wat do u have to lose? maybe she's the one
Jazz4jesus Posted November 7, 2005 Posted November 7, 2005 Yea one thing i have noticed people havnt said is introduce yourself, though you know her name and she prolly knows your name doesnt mean a thing, besides its a helpful step in the first talking bit. gives you more ground then the "Hello" to jump off of.
Parishner Posted November 7, 2005 Author Posted November 7, 2005 [quote]Yea one thing i have noticed people havnt said is introduce yourself, though you know her name and she prolly knows your name doesnt mean a thing, besides its a helpful step in the first talking bit. gives you more ground then the "Hello" to jump off of. [/quote] I was generally introduced in a huge group. When word got around that I am orignally from Russia everyone wanted to know what it was like, so a family invited me over for dinner one night since I'm newer to the area, and they introduced to that family.
avemaria40 Posted November 7, 2005 Posted November 7, 2005 say hi, have someone introduce you, and let things happen. If God wills, it will happen.
doc Posted November 8, 2005 Posted November 8, 2005 You said that your kinda new to the town right? You could start a friendship first. Like evryone said introduce your self, and i suggest you to ask her to give you a tour of the town. Its not a date but you can actually get to know her better. Or something like that. Its weird because I go through the same situation with girls/women. Dude dont feel shy, I am 23. . .lol and I am still having problems in that same area. I just get so shy!!!
little_angel202 Posted November 8, 2005 Posted November 8, 2005 find some one who could introduce you to her!
StMichael Posted November 8, 2005 Posted November 8, 2005 You'll get plenty of advice, but lets start at the beginning. - you like this gal. - you both attend the same Mass - you are new to this town - you are both hopefully around the same age Advice from a guy who was never shy: (Begin by introducing yourself and extending your hand to shake and asking her her name). - Ask a Church related question, "ie: Are you familiar with the ministries of this Church, because I'm thinking of doing something for this parish." - Ask a new town question, "You: I'm new to this area and looking for good places to eat." "Her: Oh, There are a ton of great places to grab a bite. There's .... and....." "You: "That last one sounds good, would you like to join me for lunch, etc." These are pretty rudimentary, but you get the idea. Good luck.
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